So my journey starts. This is where I'll be chronicling my journey to 90 glorious shmutz free days. I will I"yh post my full story soon but I didn't want to push off starting. One minute at a time! Thank you in advance for any chizuk you give me may Hashem pay tout back manifold!

Great to see you on the journey!!!

It's really much shorter than 90 days and much longer!!

It's shorter because it's only one day, one hour, one moment.

It's longer, it's an entire lifetime.

So welcome!! Join the crowd, and post away!!!

please note that every post is a chizik for all of

Thank you Pidiani and Ddmm for the chizuk! Quick question: part of the rules is your have to be sober for three days which I was. So is today day 4 or day one?? Chazak Rabbosai!

for sure day 4

Thanks ddmm. Hopefully I'll have my story up in the next day. Day 4 b"H was very busy so that really helps. I have to go through the handbook every day to get keep on working. I am also going to be working the steps to really just give my list over to Hashem. Have a great night.

chazak vamutz ! welcome ! its really a big boost for all of us seeing someone new joining and try to be good so keep up your good work and remember its a full time battle so keep on getting stronger and stronger because you don't know what to expect along the way .

Shgoyach DD for the kind words of chizuk and I needed them on day five! I started really weak when all I wanted to do was succumb and give it all up. I started thinking, "if on day 5 I can barely get our of bed because I'm paralyzed with lust how can I possibly keep this up?" B"h I somehow managed to convince the monster that just for the morning I wouldn't act out. One day at a time worked!

Looking back it's so terrifying how close I was to throwing it all away. Absolutely terrifying. Got to ready some extra chizuk emails today.

great job!!

One day at a time ROCKS!!!!

KUTGW!!

keep up the good work !!!!!!! hold on tight !! every hour you are being mekadesh shem shamayim . and cleaning yourself(neshamah) from whatever it got dirty with over the years . its defenitly worth the effort even when if gets hard . chazak chazak!

Pidiani and DD thanks for keeping me going. Day 6 bli ayain harah has been busy busy which is great obviously. I fell the yetzer hara is trying to use my streak against me and is saying "You're doing great what's the big deal of you look at that girl or fantasize a little before you go to sleep" that's been tough and I need to fortify that area but bli ayin hara this day this hour this second there is sanity and that's all you can ask for, right? Chazak Chevra!

ur every ones biggest chizik here
just keep in ur mind that when you are strong, you make us all strong.
make us positive
makes us going on
so keep us posted
ה' עמך גבור החיל

I would suggest that you work on each day as a challenge rather than the seemingly Mt Everest like goal of 90 days. This website and the pilpul Chaverim have helped become and remain clean for more than 100 days, the longest that I can recall since my addiction began as an adolescent.

I hear that SIB I'm just having problems plugging the cracks, for instance what's the big deal of you look at a girl. Obviously know it's very wrong but as far as my sobriety goes I wish I had more urgency in this area. What does the oilam suggest? Maybe SIB meant that I should for one day challenge myself boo matter what to be super vigilant in this area?

It's actually very simple, my problem is not only porn or masturbation, those are only the symptoms of a much broader problem.

I have a problem with lust. period. Any lust, any fantasy (and especially sexual related fantasy) is dangerous and little bits end up adding together until it ends up in masturbation.

So I need to stay away from all lust, for that is the problem, not porn or masturbation. If I am lusting, but I hold back from acting out, that is called dry drunk, or holding my breath. When I am sober that means that I am living real life, without going into that fantasy world.