Disclaimer: I am not an expert, and I am not "paskening."

I think that it may very much depend on the individual circumstances to "decide" whether a wet dream is a good sign, a bad sign or somewhere in between.

On the one hand it appears to be not such a good sign. The Kitzur Shulchan Aruch in 151:5 says
מִי שֶרָאָה, חַס-וְשָׁלוֹם, קְרִי בַּלַּיְלָה, כְּשֶׁנֵּעוֹר מִשְּׁנָתוֹ, יִטּוֹל יָדָיו וְיֹּאמַר בְּשִׁבְרוֹן לֵב, רִבּוֹנוֹ שֶל עוֹלָם, עָשִׂיתִי זֹאת שֶׁלֹּא בְּכַוָּנָה, רַק בְּהִרְהוּרִים רָעִים וּבְמַחֲשָׁבוֹת רָעוֹת. לָכֵן יְהִי רָצוֹן מִלְּפָנֶיךָ, ה' אֱלֹהַי וֵאלֹהֵי אֲבוֹתַי, מְחַק בְּרַחֲמֶיךָ הָרַבִּים עָוֹן זֶה, וְתַצִּילֵנִי מֵהִרְהוּרִים רָעִים וְכַיוֹצֵא בָהֶם לְעוֹלָם וָעֶד, אָמֵן וְכֵן יְהִי רָצוֹן

(I'm not sure if this tefillah/viduy is his own idea or he is quoting others. Anyone out there know?)

So the way I understand this, we are basically saying, "God, I understand this is an Aveirah, but please understand that it was unintentional and don't let it happen again."

So then the question is, who is the person that this happened to? Is it someone who was just recently acting out all the time and just started to sober up? Then I would not be shocked if he still had lust built up inside him and it came out now in his sleep. Is he growing? Yes. Is he a recovered person? No, of course not he still has a long way to go to work on stopping fantasies before they start and all the rest. But maybe the question to ask is, when he woke up and discovered what had happened, what is his immediate gut reaction? Is it "Wow, that felt good, and it can be guilt-free pleasure because I don't fall off the chart for this"? Or does he naturally say "How can this happen to me, I have really been making progress lately. Oh well at least it was noot intentional, but I do know that my head is not clean yet, and I will work on controlling my fantasies before they get out of control (or surrendering them if they are already out of control)"

For someone who does not struggle with fantasies, it may be either a red flag, or maybe it came completely by accident.

In any case, we don't need to judge anyone but ourselves when these things happen, even when it happened to me I wasn't sure myself how to take it. Was it a sign that I am not doing as well in my covery as my thread might suggest? Was it just one of those things that happens to everyone and I shouldn't give it much thought? Or somewhere in between?

It doesn't matter a whole lot what the rest of the hashkafos behind it are. As long as the Maskana is

Ah vet dream is vhen der bear is stuck uhn der tree und der vet comes to teyk him down end uses his tranquilizer bullets end den chaps det it's not rilly heppening it only be eh dream.

An old man jusmps into a freezing river to save a drowning cat.

After he comes out someone asks him "wow, you must really love animals, are you a vet?"

He answers "Of course I'm vet, I'm freezing"

shkoyach im maskim that it is not neccessarily what we want....but i was just expressing a feeling of gratitude to hashem and using these occurances that do need teshuvah and making possitive feelings out of them

In my very old and wet experience, it is having the fear of a wet dream that most often causes one, and not much else. A great, old sefer says that, too. (I will not quote it, though, becs it is one of those sforim that has probably caused more wet dreams than all the porn in the world - cuz it makes us obsessive-compulsively sperm-fearing guys have wet dreams.)

Really.

perhaps that's true, but I just had one; on R"h none the less; I haven't had one in ages, and there was no fear on my part whatsoever beforehand; it completely took me by surprise! Again, not saying that your assortment is not the case.

The second night, it almost happened again, and there I did have a fear of it happening.

inastruggle wrote:


A chasid dives into the freezing river and, after a while, emerges with what looks like a sopping wet cat. "Such mesiras nefesh for tzaar baalei chayim!" exclaims an onlooker. "Not at all", says the chasid. "That's my expensive shtreimel."

As I already said recently, we should have a "happy" new year.

MT

hi
checking in
still clean becasue of hashem still having very good quality life and sobriety...cus of hashem

Dov wrote:

I beleive I once heard that as the explenation as to why it is considered a nes that the cohen gadol on yom kippur never saw keri. Why should we expect him to on such a holy day with holy thougts? The answer is like dov said, fear of keri can cause it.

On a related note. Although it is brought down that seeing keri on Yom Kippur is potentially a bad sign, I saw it brought down that it does not apply to us who have improper thoughts. In that case, it is not a sign of anything. For someone who generally has pure thoughts, it can be a siman from shomayim.

I wish us all a keri free yom kippur, but don't freak out if it happens.

Rav Shternbuch in Moadim Uzmanim has a piece on this and explains it's not a sign that one will die (or whatever it is that that chazal say about one who sees keri on YK). I don't remember what he wrote though.

reallygettingthere wrote:

You remind me of a children's tape by Rabbi Fischel Schechter:
There was a kasha, ummm, but I don't remember the kasha... and ummm, there was a terutz.... but, I don't remember the terutz... I do remember though!

see also Rav Wolbe in mamarey yimey ratzon page 406 pshat in the whole sugya in yoma bsheim the rama mipano that it is to wake him up to be mischazek betshuva (ayin sham od divarim niflaim)

hi....long time no speak....bein hazmanim wasnt able to shlep to a computer
still clean since the last time. good quality also. had tons to say ver the past couple weeks but dont remember to much....gtg

That's nothing to complain abt, pal. It's super!

ditto