IT WONT

BARDICHEV  DONT LET!!!!


HUST GEHERT!!!!

Feeling GREAT now, b"h!!! And living in the moment...

DONT FALL into the trap of bigpictureism

ive gone through a bunch of threads here and it seems to me that it is very common for folks to fall in days 25-30...why is that? this is especially true of people doing this for the first time...any ideas?
also, i dont know what the halacha says but i can tell you from personal experience that you would benefit tremendously from a three day bahab fast...gd is giving you a message you cannot ignore...if i were you i would fast on thursday the 24th, if you add tzom gedaliah and yom kippur you have a behab right there...good luck...

RAGE MY MAN

(I WILL NOT INSULT YOU AND CALL YOU HEILIGEH RAGE ALTUOGH TH CHASSIDIC MASTERS HAVE SUCH A CONCEPT)

THE YH WILL "ALWAYS" LET A PERSON DO TESHUVAH UP UNTIL HIS POINT OF GREATEST RESISTANCE

THAT IS WHY I FEEL THE MIDDLE PART OF THE 90 DAYS IS SO DIFFICULT

THE INITIAL 2 WEEKS
IS MUCH EASIER TO A CERTAIN DEGREE BECAUSE YOU ARE CONCIOUSLY FIGHTING

KEEP IT UP !!!!!!

IF PEOPLE DONT GET YOU HUMOR TBOT (too bad on them)

THE OFFICIAL FLAKE OF GUE

bardichev

Bardichev (your handle makes me sad, actually, because it always conjures up to me the tremendous jewish life that existed in bardichev and the awful destruction that followed...of all of the towns in europe, i dont know if there is a sadder tale),

You said: THE YH WILL "ALWAYS" LET A PERSON DO TESHUVAH UP UNTIL HIS POINT OF GREATEST RESISTANCE

Thats interesting. why do you think our brains work that way? thats so weird.

anyway, i guess if your statement is true, until now, my point of greatest resistance has been like a day and a half...so theres something about coming back to this forum on a regular basis that has strengenthened the resistance (oooh, for a commy punk like me, "strengthening the resistance" brings up such a powerful image)...

thanks for your post...i hope one day we will be able to sit and drink together...we can even listen to mona rosenblum's niggunim, or something (no ratm, i promise)...

Day 30:

Day 30! A third of the way there! Who would've thunk it?!
bardichev wrote on 10 Sep 2009 13:47:


Powerful pointer for me as I enter the middle leg of my journey.

Thanks, Leivy Yitzchok.

Day 30:

Today is the hardest day to date.
I'm afraid I'll have to take a leave of absence from this forum for a while, as it seems to me that reading about people falling left and right has me thinking, "Gee, why can't I fall and enjoy the low once again? Big deal. I'll dust myself off again afterwards?"

Shmilu wrote on 10 Sep 2009 19:48:


As someone who has been to the low more recently than you, please allow me to remind you that there is no enjoyment there, only 10 seconds of fake, plastic endorphins rushing to the brain followed by days and days of total misery...you (like me) are an addict so youre not thinking straight right now...keep going, if only just until tomorrow...

Day 33:

I've been slipping alot the last couple of days.
Paging Revitalization, paging Revitalization. Please report for duty immediately...

shmilu,

can i please buy days 17-34 from you? it will make my climb to 90 a lot easier...name your price, bro, trust me im good for it...
what? you cant?
no, unfortuantely for me and fortunately for you, each day that you acquire is non transferable and thus priceless...motivation, zeal, resolve, attitude, revitalization these are all things that by pressing the right buttons in your brain, you can acquire in a single moment but each day of this streak of 34 has been painstakingly earned by you and no one (but yourself) can take that from you and you cant give it to anyone...my only request from you is that you dont give it away for free, for nothing to nobody...press those damn buttons in your head...make it to rosh hashana; get past this rough patch...youre more than a third of the way to shutting down the addiction...DONT BLOW IT...

Day 34:

I'm not sure what to say and how to say it:
I'm not doing well lately...

Yesterday I wanted to check if the Google SafeSearch is indeed "safe" -- since I don't have the possibility of a filter on my mobile, I had to resort to this kind of Syag: enabling SafeSearch -- and I Google Imaged some improper terms, closed my eyes almost completely so I shouldn't be totally exposed to the shmutz in case Google filtering proves to be suspect, and it 'takke' didn't show me completely exposed women, but it definitely wasn't clean either.
Today, I stumbled upon the blog of a certain (formerly) Lubavitch woman which some of you are probably familiar with and lingered for a bit too long.
Now I want you people to judge if I slipped or fell.
And it hurts especially now before the holy days, when I was convinced that I'll make it clean till Rosh HaShana, which would fall on day 40.
Why do I feel so vulnerable these days? I need major chizzuk, Rabboissai.

Elul seems to be very hard for everyone. I see that as a slip. It is not worth getting yourself down about something like that. It is a slip.

I fell.
Some might call it a slip, but I'm going to consider it a fall and start all over; I feel like a cheat continuing my "clean streak" when I wasn't completely clean.
Day 1 tomorrow.

Shmilu wrote on 15 Sep 2009 04:59:


Dear Shimlu,

Can you send me a private message telling me what happened? This past week I has some pretty serious slips which I thought were falls, until I consulted with R' Guard and he clarified where to draw the line. There is no reason to reset your count if you didn't actually fall. If you stopped in time, not only did you not fall, but really what you did by stopping was "climb".

2B