Hello all. I reached 4 months clean and then had a slip in a hotel room that had HBO available on the TV.  I thought I was doing enough before but this slip is an opportunity for me to learn from my mistakes and tighten up my plan.

I've revised my sobriety plan and wrote a plan for when I am out of town. My new travel plan prohibits having a TV in my hotel room and all M'ing, as both are risky situations for me.

My therapist recommended that I not M at all right now, which makes sense to me because I find it nearly impossible to M without picturing women or P that I have seen in the past. I've gone about 10 days without M'ing now, and it hasn't really been that hard for me. I am finding that I am having dreams every night about women, but maybe that'll go away.

Thought that getting back to posting here would be helpful too.

Keep on fighting. Posting your struggles and sharing is very helpful.

4 months is a long tine and the period of sibriety for that long will always be yours. You can get back up and do it again! Much hatzlacha and thanks for posting this.

Thanks guys. One day at a time, right?

coulnt of said it better.... 8)

I'm up to 12 days again... and I have to say it's so much easier this time around. My therapist said it's pretty typical for guys to have sexual dreams when they cut out M'ing, and I am finding that that's true... it was every night for a few days (torture) but it's getting easier.

Things are really tough between my wife and I - we've been married almost 2 years and she says she's not sure she wants to stay much longer. The P addiction is not on the top of her list of issues, probably because I've managed to make some progress over the last few months. Her feelings of unhappiness and threats of leaving are adding significant stress and anxiety to my life. My therapist has pointed out that at least I can be sober. If I wasn't, it would make everything even worse.

Music guy,

Don't let despair paralyze you, don't let the hardness of this process freeze you from pushing forward. What I mean to say is: if you are focused on real honest recovery then you will improve greatly and the relationship with your wife will as well. Keep your eye on the gold and keep on fighting!

Music,
Great to hear about your 4 month stretch!  Sorry you're having relationship issues.  Have you read Garden of Peace, a Marital Guide for Men by R' Shalom Arush?  Highly recommended. And soon!
BTW, how's your leg?
Alex

Thanks for the recommendation - I'll check it out.

My leg is getting better - walking slowly but without a boot or crutches these days. Thanks for asking!

Just wanted to post an update - went on a business trip for one night and did NOT act out. I had the TV removed from my room, did not MB, and stayed off the internet in my room. Feeling good about it!

Thanks for sharing Music Guy. It's good to hear peoples' successes.
Keep it up!

wonderful i am really happy for you.

Thats poweful music guy! To have the tv removed, wow!