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The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :)
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TOPIC: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 341174 Views

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 05 Apr 2013 00:11 #204255

  • gevura shebyesod
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You forgot the Irishman (or the Poilisher). Picks up the fly and shakes him and says "Spit it out!"
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 08 Apr 2013 02:12 #204435

  • inastruggle
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sanhedrin perek aleph mishna vov rov divrei hamaschil meah v'esrim

the rov defines two words in a way i didn't really hear before

Batalnim: people who don't work and sit in beis medrash all day

notice he didn't say batlanim are people who dont work and hang out in the streets.....

Chazanim: people who punish guilty people

i always feel punished when i hear chazzanis uh oh...

I may have taken his words a bit out of context so please don't bashmutz the rov with this.

now for a little siyum plug. (rabbi voice)
raboissai go take a masechta for the gye siyum, not only do you get oilam haboh you also get oilam hazeh because of all the jokes that are in there. (switch to salesman voice)
it's easy
it's free
it only takes a minute
to take a masechta click the link below
guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/203016-GYE-SIYUM-MISHNAYOS---please-join%21-%28Glauber%29

questions? comments?
call 1-800-mr. emunah
thats 1-800-mr. emunah
Last Edit: 08 Apr 2013 02:25 by inastruggle.

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 08 Apr 2013 20:23 #204496

  • mr. emunah
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ize gonna get me a sretch red Hummer withe EMU on the plates

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 08 Apr 2013 20:34 #204501

  • TehillimZugger
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mr. emunah wrote:
ize gonna get me a sretch red Hummer withe EMU on the plates

huh?
?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 08 Apr 2013 22:32 #204542

  • mr. emunah
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stretch hummer,

because inna is promoting to rock star status

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 08 Apr 2013 23:51 #204572

  • TehillimZugger
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inna: where's my mussar voice?
?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 09 Apr 2013 00:04 #204580

  • mr. emunah
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save it till after sfira,
then you can release an album,

Tehilim Zugger sings

"Voices of Mussar"

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 09 Apr 2013 00:32 #204598

  • TehillimZugger
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good song
?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?
Last Edit: 09 Apr 2013 00:36 by TehillimZugger.

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 09 Apr 2013 00:53 #204604

  • mr. emunah
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is it fast or slow?
a bit of hip hop with some juicy chord progresions?
good basslines?

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 19 Apr 2013 12:27 #205557

  • Blind Beggar
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What did the Arab say when he wanted to do some Jewish cooking?

:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
The Blind Beggar is a character in Rebbe Nachman's story of the Seven Beggars.
If I view a woman as an object, I am powerless over lust, but I don't have to look.
I can guard my eyes.
I want to guard my eyes.
I do guard my eyes.
Why do I say these four lines?

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 01 May 2013 01:33 #206294

  • zvi
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Why did the plane crash?
The pilot was a mushroom.

What's green with wheels?
Grass. I lied about the wheels.

(Anti-jokes, in case you didn't chup...)
Life’s a mountain. You just gotta keep climbing…

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 01 May 2013 22:55 #206388

  • inastruggle
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Why did the plane crash?
the pilot smoked too much mushroom

What's green with wheels?
a lulav on a chol hamoed trip
a pickle on roller blades
grass isnt green in my backyard

grass after smoking mushrooms

(anti-anti-jokes)
Last Edit: 03 May 2013 20:56 by inastruggle.

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 03 May 2013 06:45 #206526

  • syataDshmaya
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How many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Dont Worry, I'll just sit here in the dark!


Hey many people with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Hey is that a butterfly? Wanna go ride bikes?


How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb?
4. One to put it in, and three to argue about how it really should have been put in.

Why do we eat jelly donuts on chanukah.
They have enough oil to recreate the miracle.
-I may fall eventually, but does it have to be today?
-Trying to fill my God void with Hashem instead of more emptiness.
-One time is too much, and a thousand times is never enough.
-There is a small organ in man; when he satisfies it, it is hungry, and when he starves it, it is satisfied (Sanhedrin 107a)

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 03 May 2013 22:21 #206578

  • mr. emunah
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how many irishmen to screw in a lightbulb?

one to hold the lightbulb, and 10 to drink until the room starts spinning.

Re: The Depressed Person's Chill Spot :) 03 May 2013 22:26 #206579

  • inastruggle
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What does ADHD stand for?

Attention Deficit, HEY DONUTS
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