Yossi,

Re: Dear G-d, From a Very Far Place

I saw this poem in one of your threads when i was just starting here, and it made me cry bitterly. You captured exctly how i felt in the times when i was at my lowest, knowing deep inside that what i am doing is wrong and that i am distancing myself from Hashem, even as the monster inside me was convincing me that i shouldn't care, because He doesn't care (CH"V) and that i can never get back close to Him again so i should just do what i want.

I have been looking for it again and now I found it (and i'm crying again reading it). i am going to print it out so i can read it whenever I start feeling numb and discouraged, to remind me of where I am coming from and where I am trying to get to.

Thanks
Gevura!

Thank Zemiros for unearthing this:


bardichev wrote on 14 Aug 2009 04:05:

The OFFICIAL GYE POEM page:

www.guardyoureyes.org/?cat=52

(I wrote this as a teenager)

The Addict

In another reality you lie
Above this Earth’s sky
Where emotions wither and die
Without graves.
 
I hold out my hand
To that barren place where you stand
In that desolate land
But it passes right through you.
 
Your lips move apart
As you pour out your heart
Yet I know from the start
I won’t hear you.
 
As you fade gently away,
Softly, as light from the day,
With each vanishing ray
A part of me grows cold.
 
When you’re gone, I’m alone,
Chilled to the bone,
Colder than stone
In Antarctica.
 
But inside I do burn
As I pray, hope and yearn
For your eventual return
From that place.

Late Night In Zion
by Matisyahu
We're the reflection of imperfection
We come from the infinite place of limitation
Rejoice in these days, make a correction
We're the completion....

Lights out, down for the count and can't get up
Meanwhile the enemy screams the boy is stuck
And the legs of the King are dangling in a rut
Fallen pieces, lost sparks, hearts cut

We're not alone in the madness
If we're here, then so are you
Deepest caverns underground
We've been searchin' for the truth
Scrape my knees on the hurdles, face down in the puddles....

Only one who'll get us out of this mess
The one who put us here
I've got a spear driven through my ear
Can't you hear the sound crystal clear
Pistols crashing chandeliers
Long for brooks of water like the deers

A man is just a man filled with faults and weakness
4 AM Jerusalem all alone and speechless
At nighttime nobody's home, roam streets in darkness
I feel I'm just a man, flesh and bones, homeless

Planting seeds, they won't sink in
I'm dried up, like the desert earth
How could these seeds give birth?
Water me down, liquify, I will not be cursed
From one into a million disperse....

Wisdom rains like water from the Heavens to below
Crush my earth, seeds grow, garden starts to grow
You know you've got to rise, although you like to flow
You can't keep staring out the window....

Earth, water, wind, fire we stay low while gettin' higher
Spark igniter, fightin' tired
Stay wired, lighten loads
Fly alive, weep, wail, chant, cry, let out a sigh
Energized, give my last dime, life shouldn't pass me by

Rise to the occassion
Keep these hearts all blazin
Build your life on a river of wax
Melt into space, we've been here since the beginning, not going away
Not going away....

A man is just a man filled with faults and weakness
4 AM Jerusalem all alone and speechless
At nighttime nobody's home, roam streets in darkness
I feel I'm just a man

Doing the strong
Reckoning from all along
Atone for the weakness
Dig a fire pit, I'm speechless

Annihilate the sinning
Beg the pardon of the king
'cause I don't know what I'm singing
But from the heart it's appearing

Cream of the crop
It's a one stop shop
Drive it up with the rock
Attack from the rear to the top

Get the emotions out
Cause enemy emotional drought
From the fire the salvation sprout
To win and now without no doubt

Making sense of it all
Too crazy make no calls
To the conscience
Just stay on top of the ball
Being in the present
To make the call
From the decision prior to it all

Grasp not thin air
Achieve the dare
Don't be scared
Your fortune's waiting
's all for the taking

No one's left behind
Just the mind
Will stay wondering what went by
It will be ignored
We hear the knocking on the door

Conquering I've won
I know I'm not done
'tis part of the action
Having no distraction
Knowing he's not gone

But I can feel good
Live in the now
Be in darkness or light
Access the inner depths of my soul
Not scared of reality no more
And I can love myself and the world
I know truth and love again

kidush hashem!
AMAZING JOB, BEAUTIFUL


GUITAR
(Get Up: Into Truck, And Roll....)

Yosef Hatzadik wrote on 26 Jul 2011 19:17:


where we can't post...