laagvokeles wrote on 16 Dec 2010 18:15:
hahaha you are really funny u entretain me almost like porn.....
Perhaps that exactly can be your outlet, as Dov eluded to previously. Writing and reading this forum has helped many people, and yes can even be relaxing. Not just your thread, but look around the whole site. There's even a bais medrash where I am sure you can add a lot. It will help you and other at the same time.
My humble advice to you is to stop asking and second guessing. Re-read and listen to the chashuve guys that responded above, and stick around this forum a bit. Perhaps make a kebala to stay here for say a minum 30 days before deciding that you had enough of this.
Hatzlacha.