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Needing Help. Trying to stay strong.
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TOPIC: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 4404 Views

Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 07 Nov 2010 05:56 #83261

  • dovekbashem
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Hey Everybody. Shavua tov.

The craziest thing happened tonight... I checked the 90 day chart and... I'm on it! Shabbos was day 5.

It's a little late and I'm in my room talking to all you amazing Jews with my computer. Part of me would kind of like to fall tonight. Thankfully, I know exactly which part of me that is and listening to him in the past never did me any good!

Staying strong. Staying clean. Staying Kadosh.

Hope all is well with the holy yiddin of GYE.
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 07 Nov 2010 07:08 #83265

  • silentbattle
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Fantastic, and truly beautiful, my friend. You are an inspiration!

Now, tell me - having stayed clean, how good does it feel?
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 07 Nov 2010 07:18 #83266

  • dovekbashem
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SB,

I'm glad you asked.. and I'm glad you asked now because I really needed the reminder. It feels amazing. I am already smiling more. I am more confident. My future is already looking brighter... and speaking words of Torah never felt so good!

When I'm not clean, I actually feel guilty learning and speaking Torah... I feel like I'm pretending to have a relationship with Hashem when he is really so far away from me. I know it has only been 5 days, but He already feels closer and I can almost taste the sweetness when speaking his Torah.

It is hard... right now it is VERY hard, but I truly love it. I love yiddishkeit. I love avodas hashem. I love Hashem. I love being oved hashem b-taharah.
Ashreinu ma tov chelkeinu. Good night chevra.
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 07 Nov 2010 22:09 #83335

DB....youre awesome..............



you love hashem......he loves you back
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 08 Nov 2010 06:56 #83395

  • dovekbashem
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Friends,

Day 6 down, 98 years to go!

We are really a lucky people. There is a whole world outside of this site that has not only immersed itself completely in garbage but, even more unfortunately, has called that normal and settled for a life that wallows in p** and quick-fix stimulation.

We, on the other hand, despite being dragged down in the dirt (or should I say quicksand?), can clearly see, touch and feel the glory of an entirely different world. One that elevates us beyond any physical pleasure. One that envelops us in a warm and loving relationship with the transcendent creator of ourselves and of our universe. It really is something incredible that can bring you to tears just by the lack of words to describe how privileged we really are and how amazing our world truly is. We are an amazing people. G-d gave us a gift of indescribable depth and significance. Every night, before kriat shmah, we describe G-d's torah by saying "ki hem chayeinu v-orech yameinu"... this is true life, and this is what it means to truly be living. HaKadosh Baruch Hu wants us to choose life - v-chai bahem; u-vacharta ba-chayim etc... - and we are all in the process of choosing life and, more importantly, finally learning what it really means to live.

Ashreinu ma tov chelkeinu... ki hem chayeinu v-orech yameinu.
Good night chevra.
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 08 Nov 2010 11:40 #83405

  • jewinpain
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WOW!!!! What an inspiration to all of us, keep the flow, let hashem in ur heart
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 08 Nov 2010 11:57 #83406

  • frumfiend
beautiful beautiful !
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 03:06 #83578

wow.

they say that the name of a person really represents who they are  (they= chazal)
and you my friend are not only yourself davek bahashem, but you help us become dovek bahahshem
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 03:29 #83587

  • Yosef Hatzadik
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I think that I am becoming Dovek b'HashemsSoldier! Almost every thread has a nice post from him!
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 03:34 #83591

  • dovekbashem
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Mitzvah d-oraisah l-hidabek b-talmidei chachamim... Let's all be dovek b-Hashem'sSoldier.. and, ultimately, be dovek b-Hashem.
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 03:38 #83593

  • Yosef Hatzadik
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dovekbashem wrote on 09 Nov 2010 03:34:

Let's all be dovek b-Hashem'sSoldier.. and, ultimately, be dovek b-Hashem.


The ultimate goal is for every guy to be the best THAT THEY CAN POSSIBLY BE!!!


DovekBashem's ultimate goal is to be DovekBashem!!!
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 03:47 #83597

  • dovekbashem
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Amazing. Im Yirtzeh Hashem, Edabek bo.

Today has been a good day 7 (and, to be honest, a pretty rough day otherwise). This is peak time for me to act out... I'm stressed out and overworked.... but I won't do it. To act out, one needs a yetzer harah, and I sent him on vacation. He won't even recognize me when he gets back!
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 03:53 #83602

  • Yosef Hatzadik
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You are letting him come back??  :-\ > :-\ >
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 03:59 #83605

wow.....what a holy yid. you know 7 represent nomality, 7 days of the week, nature. and 8 goes beyond the seven days of the week.
you are on day seven, but i can see that you are ready for day 8 cus you are using supernatural powers to keep clean!
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Re: Needing Help. Trying to stay strong. 09 Nov 2010 06:37 #83641

  • dovekbashem
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7 days finished. Part of me would really... I mean seriously want to fall right now. It's late at night. Everyone is sleeping.  I have all that I need to fall at my fingertips... I have been so stressed out recently and it would be such a great escape... haven't I already proven to myself that I can stay clean if I want to? Do I really have to prove it to myself anymore? It would feel sooo good... and part of me really really (did I mention really?) wants it right now. O well. Too bad. I'm a Jew, an eved Hashem... and I think that has to mean more to us than some simple dirty pleasures in life.

Dear Yetzer Hara,
I told you you wouldn't recognize me next time you came to visit. I know we used to be friends and I used to come to you for advice, but this friendship thing wasn't really working for me. I moved on to better, wiser, holier friends.

Good-bye 7, hello 8. Good night dear chevra.
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