Hi everyone, fellow fighters. This is my first post, trying to figure out how this forum works. Will post my journey shortly. 
This forum seems to be quite complicated and confusing. I'm used to 2025 technology, this system seems older then the internet itself....

Welcome Reb Yosef!!!!!!!!! hatzlocha raba can't wait to hear more about you!

p.s. here in the mir in shanghai this technology is extremely advanced......

Hi, my name is Yosef, a 20yo bucher swimming in the stormy oceans of 2025.

Now for my journey,  I'm gonna add a little suspense, just to keep the oilem entertained a little....

Should I start from the introduction, choose from chapter 1 to 20, or straight to the current chapter? 

Is this (Introduce yourself) even the correct forum to share my journey?

Yosef, 

you're definitely in the right place.... there's noting like the GYE family....

as far as your journey, i think it's more of what the pro's here at GYE can help you get out of the ocean, we all swim in the same ocean....

Hey there Yosef. Welcome! You'll feel at home here. Don't worry you'll figure out the forum, not too complicated...

I choose chapters 1-20!
בהצלחה!

Hey, Someone123, you gotta provide some popcorn if that's your choice!
Welcome YosefHetzaddik!!! This is a great place where you'll beH learn how to get past all the garbage. Looking forward to hearing from you

Welcome to the warmest family in the world!

Here you will find true care, concern, and warmth.
Here you will learn that you CAN break free!
As you may know, there are many tools here to help you in this fight, some of them you may not be familiar with.
There is the F2F Program, the Vaad Program* (click here for an explanation of what the vaad is), and the book The Battle of the Generation - many have found this very helpful in reframin' the struggle.
Posting is a great way to connect, learn, and grow also. 
(The Hall of Fame Thread is an awesome compilation of some the great threads on GYE.)

There is also an extremely powerful tool of accountability, friends, and mentors that has helped hundreds - myself included.
HHM - Hashem Help Me - is the mentor-in-chief around here. He's reachable at michelgelner@gmail.com.
Some of the other great guys here are Eerie - 1gimpelovitz@gmail.com, Muttel - muttel15@gmail.com,   Reb Akiva - mevakesh247@gmail.com iwantlife - iwantlifegye@proton.me minhamayim - minhamayim1@gmail.com amevakesh - amevakesh23@gmail.com iwannalivereal - iwannalivereal@gmail.com

Keep postin', you'll see, the oilam is here for you.

Lookin' forward to seeing great things from you!
And don't forget, as always, KOMT!!

eerie wrote on 30 Jun 2025 18:29:

No problem! Next time you're in town I'll make sure to get you some! 

"My Struggle"

Hi, my name is yosef, im a 20 y/o single bucher.

My journey started in my mid teens when my friend introduced me to masturbation. His goal was to get me to be his sin buddy, thank g-d that i didn't fall for that. But since then, till like 7 months ago, i got totally hooked and masturbated daily, sometimes even multiple times a day.

3/4 of a year later, about 5 years ago, I bought my first device, got hooked on P, and watched every day till like January 2024 when I upgraded my Gentech filter settings and blocked almost all stimulation. But for the next few months I fell through from time to time on my spare devices through Hotspot, or on my own device with creative hacky workarounds that I found. Hodu la'shem ki tov that this Rosh Hashana I accepted as a new years resolution to never fall again and hashem with his great mercy helped me and I finally quit completely and never fell again since. I feel like it isn't even a nisoyon anymore.

But.

Masturbation has remained as a hard struggle.
Because the whole נושא of מז"ל is so taboo in our community, I didn't even realize it's a problem. I thought that for a bucher it's 100% permitted. After all ער ואונן were married. That was their sin, they wasted valuable useful seed. Why would it be assur for a bachur?

I have since educated myself that it is indeed assur for a bucher too, although I am not still clear why from a halachik point of view.

Now to my current struggle to overcome מז"ל.
B"h after sukkos I managed to complete around 11 days. Then starting before Chanukah I managed to complete 40 days, at which point I was sure that I am an angel and the biggest hidden tzadik since Yosef HaTzadik himself. But after the 40 days I fell hard, falling daily again for a week or so. I then decided to make a goal to try to reduce frequency to only once every 3 days, thinking that's an easier goal to achieve. I then found out that once by 3 it's much easier to go for more... so Pesach at night after the seder I was at 4 days and made a resolution to count sfira completely clean and reach Shvuous and be mekabel the Torah on a spiritual high. That didn't work out after I fell on day 8. I then completed another 15 clean days by using the only 3 days method. And then another 38 days with that method, after which g-d sent me a very immodest woman in a very unexpected place that caused me such urges that i just couldn't resist. I fell through that night, thinking of g-d the whole time, in a way that I didn't even enjoy it, zero pleasure. The next day the urge was still there, full force, I managed to push another day, and another, but ultimately fell through very hard.

Then I discovered this wonderful GYE project, and started the 3 day method again together with a very strong Shmiras Einiyim resolution (i had shmiras einiyim since mid-winter, but i became very extremely strict with it), and here I am, June 30 2025, on day 12...

For context, i feel that my struggle is mostly a coping mechanism, because, without getting into detail, I had an VERY hard childhood, with extreme family disfunction.

Hoping to get advice, guidance, maybe a mentor or accountability partner, and swim to freedom together with all of you tzadikim on here, g-ds personal warriors, 

Yosef the Tzadik

Shalom and Welcome Yosef the Tzadik!

Sounds like you've been doing some tough and meaningful work already. Kudos!

Check out some of the great resources that ProudYungerman posted and reach out anytime.

All the best!

yosefthetzadik wrote on 30 Jun 2025 19:42:

Welcome Yosef!! 
It's great to have you on board! Your determination and honesty will get you far iyH!!
So you've decided to skip the 20 chapters – looking forward to hearing the full version (maybe a little about your difficult childhood?) when you're ready... no pressure obvs.

From my experience, as long as we're not 100% convinced that M* is wrong and bad for us, all the counting in the world won't help. I am not sure what you've read so far to educate yourself, but it may be worth learning all of the sources properly inside (not the scary ones) until it becomes your passion to win this battle. Once you have that clarity and strong will, you'll find it much easier to overcome. Just like you've managed to overcome the P* challenges with such success – you clearly have what it takes to beat the YH!!

Much Hatzlachah!!

Looking forward to hearing from you,
UpAndDown

wow!!!

at this point you should be proud of yourself, the fact that you're able to overcome these tough Nisyonos you are like Yosef Hatzadik.... and with Hashems help you will be able to bring this to the level and iyh get rid of your remaining struggles....

Thanks you guys for all the love and support, it really means a lot and makes me feel good.

Even more when I check out the profile of each of you guys that commented, and I get a picture of you guys's struggles, endurance, resilience and i see the large number of Holy days under your belts, it gives me hope, chizzuk, and what to look forward too. 

I feel honored to be part of such a holy family. A part of Hashem's most Elite Commando Unit, "Guardians of the Eye.

P.s. I see that almost everyone active on the chat sharing their story are married. Although it is a similar struggle, i do somewhat feel that a married person has somewhat of an advantage. Not that this is a competition. When I look at the 90 day chart, I see a trend that the higher you go, the less percentage people are singles. I set my eyes on that 90-day target, and it would be great to hear advice from singles how they reached that goal, and if in their opinion there is a difference between the struggles. 

Hoping to be up there one day, and thanks again.

Yosef

I feel that pretty soon I'm gonna have to join an addiction recovery program to break free from this forum, I'm nearly addicted by now...