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A bit of my story
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TOPIC: A bit of my story 143 Views

A bit of my story 01 Apr 2025 02:11 #433904

  • menchu660
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Hi!
I’ve been on here for quite a while, never really posted tho.
I’ve been having a rough time recently, I can’t seem to get myself past 2 weeks.

my struggle started from way back when, I mean even in first grade my mind was already curious. 
I didn’t actually discover porn till I got a device in 6th grade or so, from that point I was kinda hooked. Of course all the feelings of sham and secrecy were constantly present and quite hard to deal with.
no one ever taught me about these kinda things.
i struggled till 9th grade and then some weird thing happened. I decided to stop, and i did, for a full 5 years.
pretty crazy no?
in that time i was in a mind space were sexual acting out was so not an option.
then one night I was after a farbrengen, I drank a bit of mashke, and I m’d.
like what?!?! How did that happen.
i have no clue.
but that was 3 years ago and since then it’s been a struggle. Up and down.
I’ve had some long streaks like 150 days, but that passed, now I’m just trying to get past 30.

I’ve reached out to some members here, but I need some solid support, I need someone I can speak to and a group I can be in touch with.

anyway, feel free to reach out,

my email is mendel08040@gmail.com

Re: A bit of my story 01 Apr 2025 03:38 #433915

  • trying23
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Big welcome 
kudos for taking this seriously and trying to work on it now instead of waiting till you're older
Much hatzlocho on your journey 

Re: A bit of my story 01 Apr 2025 15:41 #433952

  • proudyungerman
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Welcome to the warmest family in the world!

Here you will find true care, concern, and warmth.
Here you will learn that you CAN break free!

Have you tried any of these tools?
There is the F2F Program, the Vaad Program (click here for an explanation of what the vaad is), and the book The Battle of the Generation - many have found this very helpful in reframin' the struggle, as you mentioned.
Posting is a great way to connect, learn, and grow also. 
(The Hall of Fame Thread is a great compilation of some the great threads on GYE.)

There is also an extremely powerful tool of accountability, friends, and mentors, as has been mentioned, that has helped hundreds - myself included.
HHM - Hashem Help Me - is the mentor-in-chief around here. He's reachable at michelgelner@gmail.com.
Some of the other great guys here are Eerie - 1gimpelovitz@gmail.com, Muttel - muttel15@gmail.com,   Reb Akiva - mevakesh247@gmail.com iwantlife - iwantlifegye@proton.me minhamayim - minhamayim1@gmail.com amevakesh - amevakesh23@gmail.com

Keep postin', you'll see, the oilam is here for you.

Lookin' forward to seeing great things from you!
And don't forget, as always, KOMT!!
Feel free to reach out and say hi!
proudyungerman@gmail.com
406-219-8398

My Journey:
guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/406231-The-Real-Me
Last Edit: 01 Apr 2025 15:43 by proudyungerman.

Re: A bit of my story 01 Apr 2025 16:32 #433960

  • yerushalmikugel
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Hi.

Kol hakavod for taking the plunge.

As has been mentioned, your best bet really is reaching out to one of the mentors. But the chevra on the forum are a tremendous source of chizuk and friendship too
"In life, you've only got your slice. If it's too peppery, take another pickle!" ~ Yerushalmi Kugel

"If you're getting burned, you're too close to the platte" ~ Yerushalmi Kugel (from experience)

"You can leave in peace, or you can leave piece by piece" ~ Unknown university professor

"Why take a slice, if you can have the whole entire thing"  ~ Mr Pickle 

Hey! Have you ever seen a talking yerushalmi kugel?

Re: A bit of my story 01 Apr 2025 19:30 #433973

  • redrobin
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Hi Mendel,

You are not alone. You are good. You are loved. 


Don't forget to be kind to yourself as you go through this journey of healing.

Many of us tend to be hard on ourselves. 

Hashem loves us


-RR
-RR
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