To me, this is indicative of real progress, when the urges come, and we somehow figure out how to manage them. Understanding how our YH works, is also helpful, as a tool before we're in his clutches. Once we're in grip it's often too late. Keep on trucking and moving forward! One day at a time, one urge at a time.

I’m making a quick in and out trip which means lots of room to slip.
Here's the plan
1. I made sure to take a companion and although he’s not thinking to look out for me but I don’t want to get “caught”
2. I’m posting here that although I’ll be in a airport 4 times within 24 hours I’ll try to be extra vigilant to not let my eyes and thoughts wander
3. thinking to learn something on the way there and think about the purpose of my trip

let you know how it all went tomorrow night

Day 13

Day 14

2 weeks



BH my trip went well I managed to keep myself distracted by staying on the move when possible and when just waiting around I went to a quiet area, I learned a little and had a companion to keep me busy. 

Now I see that I can do it, I still need to be careful but it’s attainable 

Mazel tov!! 
Not on two weeks, but on realizing that its attainable. If you did it once you can do it again!!

My friend your growth and aspirations to be closer to Hashem is awe inspiring!

KOMT ODAAT

Day 15

Day 16

Today we did bedikas chometz, my chometz isnt really hidden I just need to get rid of it.
I think every year by the yehi ratzon the thought crossed my mind that hopefully this time ואת יצרנו הרע תעבירהו מאתנו.... now I think I will come to biur chometz a little further in the journey of getting rid of it. I don't know of a physical Korban pesach that I can bring (besides for the entire internet which I don't control) as @vehkam writes on his thread but I will again be asking hashem for help in getting rid of it for me.

Accomplishment!
The chometz within us is the ישות , the aspect in us who feels it neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeds, and if not, he will disintegrate into nothing (aka ביטול)...
א כשרן און פרייליכן פסח

Day 20
BH had a really nice Yom Tov and put some thought into cheirus.

Day 21

Day 22

Day 26

trying23 wrote on 21 Apr 2025 04:57:

גמטריא שם הו"יה
Hashem is helping you.
Keep it up

Day 28
Don't feel that posting here is making much of a difference at the moment but iI'll try to keep it up

trying23 wrote on 23 Apr 2025 03:06:

It inspires others buddy. Loads of guys lurk in the shadows of the forum looking for chizuk - "is this really possible?" Post for their sake.