jewizard21 wrote on 13 Nov 2024 01:15:

I'm no rabbi but if it's a mitzvah and you are ready to get married, it would be no different than tefilin and Lulav where 'i have no time's simply isn't an excuse (obviously אונס is not included) 
You should speak to someone to prioritize your day and figure out how to find the time. 

Believe me, having a wife and kids is the absolute best thing a human could have happen to them. Just experience one time where you come home from work and when you walk into the door, the kids come running and say "Daddy" (tatty or abba is acceptable too) makes every second spent on dating and marriage worth it. 

Hashem should bentch you to find the 'perfect for you wife' bekorov mamish! 

You don't understand how busy I am.  I want nothing in the world more right now than to start dating and to get married but I don't believe it's the right thing to do in my current situation. How can I be devoted to my wife if I am too busy.

If you want more of an explanation as to why I don't have time, message me.

When I pass the part in benching that your supposed to say ואת אישתי I get sad that I can't. I want to share my life with someone but I don't even have enough time in the day for my own life right now.

Please don't think that I am saying I don't have time to get married because I am lazy. I wish that were the case because then I would be able to.

Again, for more details private message me.

Thank you so much for your response, I appreciate it. I will definitely talk to a rav that can understand my situation.

Keep on Trucking, One Day At A Time!!

Today was really hard, I'm exhausted, stressed, and demoralized, and I'm not even done with the week. Hopefully next week won't be as difficult 
I'll be on gaurd till I'm in a better mood in case my brain tries to tell me that masturbation will help bc I know it wwon't. It would just make things worse.

Keep on Trucking, One Day At A Time!!

jewizard21 wrote on 15 Nov 2024 02:09:

You're a wizard! 
And a warrior. 


Pick up the phone and call someone. 
It's worth it

    Have you ever taken a deep breath, straightened you posture, and put on a smile? It does wonders!!
    Tell yourself it will be OK and that it will all work out because Hashem is there for you.
    I made sure to talk to ppl (they were not from GYE) and I've also scheduled a meeting with a rav to discuss the previous post about shidduchim and when it's responsible for me to start.

Thank you all for your support of just being here on this forum, and don't forget to smile. Have a great shabbos!

Keep on Trucking, One Day At A Time!!

    Just a thought I had on last week's parsha that I feel really relates to this nisoyon and the schar (reward) that comes from battling.

Disclaimer this is not a post to discount the greatness of the people in tanach but to try and learn from them.

    We have 2 instances in the 4th alya. 1 with Lotes daughters and another with Sarah being abducted by avimelech if im not mistaken.
   From the story of Lots daughters we know that even with good intentions illicit relations are assur, they thought they were the last in the world! We know that they got the zchus of the line of Malchus to come from after they did full teshuva.
    By the story of Sarah Emanu the medrash/mefarshim tell us that Avimelech did not even touch Sarah because Hashem protected her. We see that even in what seems to be the most inevitable and worst situations that Hashem will protect us.

I'm not sure if I explained this well but what I took out of it is that We may fall but when we get back up and prevail not only will we get tremendous reward but Hashem will be with us every step of the way.

Keep on Trucking, One Day At A Time!!