eved41 wrote on 10 Dec 2020 00:38:

MIRACLE #2 BY Eved41

Thank you for accepting the challenge and posting! 

I just want to address the words in your post that I bolded. Many times the things that people get encouragement from is from places we didn't expect. Here and there a specific line somebody wrote about their struggles or victories, resonates with a person in a particular situation. I've had many times where I've been reading a post, hoping for encouragement and I gained it from a few words here or there that the writer would never have thought that those would be making the impact.

Another point. The fact is that posting about your struggles lends an accountability that works for some reason. Although it's an anonymous forum and none of us know who the other one is, at the end of the day there's a brotherhood and a camaraderie that we have for one another and we don't want to let each other down. I can clearly say with 100% complete honesty that the only reason I'm holding where I am today is due to the accountability of the forum, in addition to what I've learned here. It's tried and true.

I'd like to encourage you to continue to participate in the forum by starting your own thread and committing to post continuously about your journey.

                                   Grant

Hi Guys, 
I have posted many times on this forum.
But these days I am having a hard time, so I am going to hash it all out from the beginning. Unfortunately, I can't speak around my wife as she doesn't like it. So although, I would love to speak to you guys on the phone I could only do so when I am out of the house. This does not happen often, and therefore I am going to put it on display over here.
Thanks Grant for bringing out this challenge to all of us.

It all started when I was 22 years old. I had to visit physiotherapy and my physiotherapist a frum yid told me to buy bike shorts as I liked to bike a lot. So I googled bike shorts and youtube came up. Not knowing that youtube was going to schlep me down I watched a man in those shorts. Then the next video was bad. I felt myself needing the washroom and then white stuff came out and I was shocked. It never happened to me before. BH, I stopped watching and that was it.

The next time these things happened to me, when I was taking courses and it involved writing a paper about women. We had to google certain things which led to going reading not the right stuff which put me on a wrong trajectory. I fell several times during this semester. But at a certain time I said that was it and it was.

Then BH I got married and things were going well in not being motzei Zera until I got anxiety about premature ejaculation. That made me fall several times 509 days ago.

BH since then I have been pretty good. But now, I am googling things that are not bad, but do have the potential of going the wrong path and losing it. 
I enjoy wearing shorts to bed, that's just the way I am, of course with tzizis and undershirt. I like googling pj sets for men, but often include women too. I stop and then I do it again. I want to stop. I dont consider it a fall unless i C"V lose Zera C"V.

I need Hashem's blessings in so many areas and I feel like such a miserable person. I really want to stop and some times I do. 
BH I have an amazing filter that sends an email to my wife if I request a site to be open. It also does not allow me to have see any pictures on google. I have closed and locked many categories.

Thanks all for listening

I must give a huge Yasher Koyach to grant. Recently he is very active on the threads and I see he has clarity and has the mind set to help us in our struggles. 

May we learn from Yosef Hatzaddick in this week's parsha to win our struggles and lust.

Also the mackabbes had to fight the yivonim in all the things they were doing. We know that the yivonim also did many things that were not tznius in public.

In any case may we all over come and turn our yetzer hora into a yetzer tov so that we could have 2 instead of only one.

Thanks all

Eyes

eyes wrote on 10 Dec 2020 02:54:

MIRACLE #3 BY Eyes

Thank you eyes for accepting the challenge!

Thank you for sharing your story and struggles. You have quite a long streak under your belt! Kol hakavod!

I understand there's difficulty with being in contact with GYE members by phone as of now, but the forum is extremely useful too.

By continuing to use it by starting your own thread, you will find it very helpful to post about your struggles. There are so many great guys here with a lot to share and a lot to gain from you.

About your Googling the "light" stuff. We all know that besides for bringing us down a path were we have a big chance of ending in a fall, it just makes it much harder for ourselves on a daily basis. To constantly be tempting ourselves and giving the lust in us little nips just causes us pain. So, is there a way you can put a stop to those "innocent searches"?

Can't wait to see you around on the forums!

                                   Grant 

As we await for all the miracle people to come out from their caves...

Please share your story, don't hide it just because you think noone will benefit from it.

You might never know the result of sharing your story.

Thank you to those that have shared their stories. Please continue to post and share chizuk.

@grant400 thank you for starting this challenge.

And who will accept the challenge tonight??

On the first night of chanukah??

Who will be today's hero??

Grant400 wrote on 10 Dec 2020 23:39:

LET US NOT BREAK THE STREAK OF HEROES !!!!

WHO HAS THE COURAGE TO ACCEPT THE CHALLENGE TODAY?!?

I think people who are afraid to post could start small by clicking Thank You on posts they read, to start getting their name noticed. (Baby steps.)

Let’s go guys! It’s not so hard, post about yourself and join this chevra of aspiring Ovdei HaShem!
Together, anything is possible!

We have had many new people post for the first time in the past few days. Those people took their first step in the new journey of the rest of their life. Here's another invitation for those that need a little bit more of a push to summon up the encouragement to start posting.

Who will be the next one to accept the challenge?

Dear friends,
It says in sforim that zos chanukah is the final day of the rosh hashana and yom kippur period. We can still make this year clean.
If you have a struggle share it. Share your story. We are all here for you.
Make a new start and post.

This morning, i wanted to google something  that I should not. I reminded myself what Mr. Grant said that these searches of lust get us nowhere. So BH up until now and even this second I am holding myself back.
Post your story, get out of the pit.
You will feel like a boulder has been lifted off you.
I am shocked that there were so few responces.
In the GYE video for Rosh Hashana campaign they said that GYE has 30,000 members. 
Where are you guys?
Come here and post. We are a family. Come out and post. Do it for yourself, your wife and your kids.
It can be a life changer 

Its almost zos chanukah

I was also taken aback when they said they have 30,000 members

I suspect there are a lot of guys that either come and go or they are just not ready to open up and share their story.

It's really difficult to eccept the fact that "I" need help. As well its just as hard to eccept yourself, the way you are.

In fact, what made me start my own journey on gye is because I eccepted myself, I eccepted the hard truth that I need help and I can't help myself.

guys, if what you are trying is not working, if after you tried yourself and nothing is working, then get serious and realize you need help.
Start sharing your story, start calling the chevra on the forums. You are not alone and there are many on here that relate to your struggle.

Grant400 wrote on 10 Dec 2020 04:06:

Yes, BH when i read your posts they really help

Your contribution to klal yisroel is greatly appreciated

Eyes, your post is super. Courageous, honest, and inspiring. A question - What are you trying to accomplish when you google questionable items? Are you teasing yourself? Are you trying to cause an accidental ejaculation? Or to indirectly cause a wet dream? Or are you trying to escape something? I think if you have clarity why you are doing it, you can iyh get a handle on it.

Grant400 wrote on 08 Dec 2020 16:00:

Rabboisai,
It doesn’t need to be Chanuka to do the “Chanuka Challenge”!