Happy to hear you are doing well. A freilichen tomid!

Amazing! Happy Clean Monthiversary!

Could you post the ma'arei makom?

here it is the whole piece is great can be found on hebrew books but at the end he says a vort about hayom

b"h purim was great but oy the after purim release of all that stress found me on youtube  for 3 hours 
i think i need to get high again
how do we deal with the need to let out a lot of stress when i need peace and quite i find myself craving
this distraction from everything  

maybe try some good old fashioned exercise

tzomah wrote on 14 Mar 2017 19:58:

"Getting high," as you put it, is probably not such a good idea. How about "getting normal?" A healthy stress relief for me is to help another person or have a schmooze with someone. It gets me out of my head and I generally feel good afterwards. Some people also like doing creative things, like painting or drawing. 

it turned into a fall and i struggled a whole day today with not letting it drag me down all the way 
i still was clean for longer than ever 
i saw how much better life is without thinking every second about the next fix
i never thought i will never fall again on this journey 
i'm fine and still normal 
i can't be scared of a fall because it probably means i am already tripping
i'm getting up today so i can stand tomorrow

Longest streak ever!
Great action plan, pick yourself up and take the lessons with you to the next longest streak

tzomah wrote on 16 Mar 2017 17:22:

It's a sign of great strength that you didin't let the fall "do you in". In the past when i fell and m***, i would throw in the towel and do it a bunch more times until it simply didn't work. You made it BH for a nice long stretch and will iyh continue on to success. This fall will just be a bump in the road. May Hashem give you the ability to do as you wish - to get up, shake off the dust, and move forward. We are all rooting for you. Keep posting. (and if you have not done so yet, maybe start talking to people too)

today i was teetering 
sat on comp. for 6 hours
but i only am considering it a slip
lot's of stress at home i need to figure out how to deal with stress
i started listening to cure the craving what were others experiences with it?

tzomah wrote on 19 Mar 2017 19:36:

Imagine how many threads you could have read from the forum in that time
Being in front of the comp isn't the issue, its doing the right thing for your soul that is when in front of it.
Everyone has different ways of dealing with stress, many here say exercise and therapy are two of the big ones.
You should be blessed with less stress in your life and with the tools to deal with everything that happens with yishuv daat.
Stay strong, climb out of the hole, and hold your head high! (eyes down) 

thanks for the chizuk
tom. will be a good day bez"h

tzomah wrote on 19 Mar 2017 19:36:

Acting out is the easy way out stress reliever which makes us feel horrible anyway. Don't do it. Instead, exercise. It really works. Also, talk to someone. A real person. A voice on the telephone. It also works. You do not need to reveal your true identity (but you eventually should, once you feel the person is trustworthy). You can get a google voice fake phone number for the meantime. Personally besides exercise and developing relationships with partners and successful people I also worked a lot on why I am so stressed. CBT and old fashioned therapists can be very helpful in dealing with this. May Hashem give you strength and da'as and menuchas hanefesh.

b'h i am feeling great and relaxed
because of that the situation at home is much better my wife is much happier and more into 
relations and is finally starting to get something real out of it (i think/i hope) after 6 years of marriage
i think my mindset is starting to shift that i really have to work on myself and stop wishing everyone else to change 
btw i started doing exercise and stretches its really helping knock out cravings so thanx all for that advice
also started listening to cure the craving cds really interesting and helpful did anyone else do that program?

So happy things are straightening out. When relations work the way they are supposed to, the whole matzav ruach at home changes; not just in the bedroom. You are one of the honest and courageous people that is growing in the realization that we cannot change the world around us; however we can effect a change on that world by changing ourselves. Did you ever listen to simcha feuerman's chosson shiurim (in the shiurim section of the GYE site)?