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The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General)

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TOPIC: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 6066 Views

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 16 Oct 2013 22:17 #221301

MendelZ
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There is soooo much great stuff from the olden days. For example...

Elya K wrote:

Its like this story in 6 chapters:

Chapter 1: I walk down the street, I see a hole, I fall in.
Chapter 2: I walk down the street, I see a hole, I fall in, I get up.
Chapter 3: I walk down the street, I see a hole, I walk around it.
Chapter 4: I walk down the street, I see a hole, I cross to the other side.
Chapter 5: I walk down the other side of the street
Chapter 6: I walk down a different street.

This is the story of recovery... setting boundaries, falling sometimes, getting back up, keep going but not pushing it.

As the saying around here goes, "I put it here because I like it!"

אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר
That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 23 Oct 2013 01:56 #221636

MendelZ
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Here's what I've been thinking lately:

In the sefer Tzeida Laderech from Rabeinu Menachem Ibn Zarach, it says:
אין מנוחה כעזבון התאוה. There is no menucha like abandoning desire/lust. (I saw it quoted in the chassidishe Pele Yoetz.)

It doesn't say overcoming or conquering lust, rather abandoning it. There is no menucha like that of simply giving it up, giving it away and no longer NEEDING taaiva to survive. I don't need to beat lust. Instead abandon it. Its not delivering what it promises to. Leave it behind.

We go for lust because we feel empty and disappointed with ourselves and our lives. As long as we remain with that in our gut, we NEED lust to survive (as has been pointed out on this forum many times). But as I stay clean more and more, by accepting the life Hashem wants me to have, by staying away from triggers, by engaging in real, meaningful things in a real, meaningful way, I am finding out more and more that I don't NEED to run after lust anymore to deal with that emptiness and disappointment. As we invite Hashem and His goodness into our lives, we become untethered. We are no longer chained to lust. That's real menucha. Rest from having to frantically run after lust just to get by. If we don't abandon it, and instead we try to either use it or fight it, we have no menucha.

A furry old bear mentioned b'shem Rav Shloime Twerski of Denver: "Happiness comes from abandoning desires, not from chasing desires."

Similarly, it could be said: "Menucha comes from abandoning desires, not from conquering desires."

אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר
That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 23 Oct 2013 16:15 #221680

tryingtoshteig Current streak: 115 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder תן חיוך, הכל לטובה Posts: 489 Karma: 13	MendelZ wrote: A furry old bear mentioned b'shem Rav Shloime Twerski of Denver: "Happiness comes from abandoning desires, not from chasing desires." I never said that!
	"ויעזור ויגן ויושיע לכל החוסים בו ונאמר אמן" -- ArtScroll Gabbai's Handbook

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 23 Oct 2013 23:12 #221725

MendelZ OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 291 Karma: 14	tryingtoshteig wrote: MendelZ wrote: A furry old bear mentioned b'shem Rav Shloime Twerski of Denver: "Happiness comes from abandoning desires, not from chasing desires." I never said that! I didn't say a furry old bear with a Nanach kappel.
	אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 24 Oct 2013 01:42 #221747

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	he meant this one. maybe. (Mendel, thank you very much for sharing that!)
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 24 Oct 2013 02:23 #221753

Pidaini OFFLINE Platinum Boarder פדני מעושק אדם-מיצר הרע העושק את הבריות-רש"י Posts: 2189 Karma: 107	ZemirosShabbos wrote: he meant this one. maybe. (Mendel, thank you very much for sharing that!) That's it Mendel, If those are the guys ur quoting, I ain't talking to you again, uh uh.
	Yankel \| My Ladder \| Talking to Hashem I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus. Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel "Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov Last Edit: 24 Oct 2013 02:26 by Pidaini.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 24 Oct 2013 16:31 #221790

tryingtoshteig Current streak: 115 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder תן חיוך, הכל לטובה Posts: 489 Karma: 13	Pidaini wrote: That's it Mendel, If those are the guys ur quoting, I ain't talking to you again, uh uh. But if he quotes me, it's OK, Yankel, you can still talk to him.
	"ויעזור ויגן ויושיע לכל החוסים בו ונאמר אמן" -- ArtScroll Gabbai's Handbook

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 24 Oct 2013 16:47 #221792

tryingtoshteig Current streak: 115 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder תן חיוך, הכל לטובה Posts: 489 Karma: 13	...unless that really was me! Warning: Spoiler!
	"ויעזור ויגן ויושיע לכל החוסים בו ונאמר אמן" -- ArtScroll Gabbai's Handbook Last Edit: 24 Oct 2013 16:49 by tryingtoshteig.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 24 Oct 2013 18:29 #221802

gevura shebyesod
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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear
Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair
Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, wuzzy?

!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל

"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant

My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 25 Oct 2013 02:51 #221833

MendelZ
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I have nothing clever to respond to all of you comedians, so I'll just say "hi".

Oh yeah, and today I'm celebrating an official 87 days free of masturbation, porn, movies of any sort, Youtube, fantasies about women and intentional arousal. (I say official because B"H I was clean for a few weeks, maybe a month or two, before I started counting.)

Thank you all for your chizuk and inspiration! Thanks to GYE, Guard and, most of all, G-D!!!!

אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר
That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 25 Oct 2013 16:25 #221869

tryingtoshteig
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MendelZ wrote:

I have nothing clever to respond to all of you comedians,...

Then I guess your avodah here is not finished!!

MendelZ wrote:

Oh yeah, and today I'm celebrating an official 87 days free of masturbation, porn, movies of any sort, Youtube, fantasies about women and intentional arousal. (I say official because B"H I was clean for a few weeks, maybe a month or two, before I started counting.)

You're doing awesome, Mendel! KOMT!!! KUTGW!!! And KOIU (keep on inspiring us)!!!

MendelZ wrote:

Thank you all for your chizuk and inspiration!

...and comedy routines! You're welcome!

"ויעזור ויגן ויושיע לכל החוסים בו ונאמר אמן" -- ArtScroll Gabbai's Handbook

Last Edit: 25 Oct 2013 16:27 by tryingtoshteig.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 25 Oct 2013 19:06 #221885

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	Mazel Tov Mendel! many more happy clean days! you should speak to Dov about comedy. He has a retirement plan similar to a Roth 401k, except that in involves "clown costumes and talmudical research". for more details see here guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/212313-Married-a-Long-Time-and-Need-Help?limit=15&start=240#221853
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 28 Oct 2013 03:57 #222067

MendelZ OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 291 Karma: 14	Thanks guys! Just wanted to share something I heard from my Rebbe last Shabbos: "Evil is too strong. We won't win. Hashem will! By living one day at a time with mesirus nefesh, by transcending self, Hashem will step in and put Evil in its place." Just sayin'.
	אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d. Last Edit: 28 Oct 2013 03:58 by MendelZ.

Re: The Ramblings of a Recovering Lunatic (General) 28 Oct 2013 04:09 #222069

MendelZ
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So, I thought I was at 90 days and I'm thinking "YAY!! WOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!" Etc. et al.

Then I went to update my chart thingie, which I haven't done for a spell. The page refreshes and it says "91 days clean". WHAT?! I MISSED day 90!!! And I was soooo close!! Aargh!!!

I guess its true after all: One day at a time. And if you do what you can (read: what you are supposed to do), Hashem might just throw in an extra day because he loves you.

Hashem, I know you look at me as I am right now. Not as who I might be tomorrow. Please, help me make good choices today.

אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר
That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.