Question to throw out there:

I might not be "clean" for long enough to be asking this question, but (1) I've had a clean period before for almost two years, and (2) I really think I just need the constant chizuk and accountability this site provides for me to stay in control. But maybe that's dangerous thinking...

I'm wondering how those of you with children - old enough to have adult conversations with, or close to that age - handle talking about these issues? I am particularly concerned that one or two of our children have addictive tendancies similar to mine (i.e. introverted, sensory-needing type personalities). They are still little, but I know these will be topics I'll have to deal with in the future. On one hand, I'm afraid that after getting a handle on my own issues, I will end up being mistrustful of my children if I sense they're spending too much time alone, etc. On the other hand, I sense that if I "fix" myself and become more of a confident person that will rub off on the rest of the family. I realize the most important things will be taking care that images, whether computer or other media, are not available in our home, as much as possible. But, I'm worried I may "live through" a similar struggle in my children making their own discoveries. I also worry that I may feel guilty bringing up conversations and a willingness to be open about these topics since I couldn't control myself for so long. Sorry if this isn't clear - but just kind of sharing some thoughts of my own and interested to hear yours. Thanks!

Oops - I meant to post this in the "Baalei Batim" forum. I'm going to post it there also - so anyone who wants to respond please do so there.

There are good parent guides in the eBooks section of GYE. That should give you some good material. guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/category/prevention

You say " I realize the most important things will be taking care that images, whether computer or other media, are not available in our home, as much as possible."

I'm not sure I agree - . Raising emotionally healthy children (something I am not qualified to talk about) is probably the most important thing. Imagine parents that are controlling and overbearing. The child is likely to rebel. Now, the parents were VERY CAREFUL to NEVER let the child see anything inappropriate. The child now rebels by doing exactly those things.

Dr Sorotzkin tells a story about a father that was that way, and his kids were going off the derech right and left. He said that he was having emunah problems because how could Hashem do this to him if he is so zahir in mitzvos?! He was clueless that his stringent attitude was pushing his kids off the derech!

I realize this is an extreme case, but I'm just trying make a point.

Obviously, it is important to eliminate bad influence as much as possible. I am only taking issue with the words "the most important thing". I'd say - "second most".

See this eBook guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/gye-protecting-our-youth-experts-speak?category_id=149

I especially like the Dr Sorotzkin and Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen parts.