Hi Everyone,
I am a little hesitant to write on this forum. I have finally decided to give it a go. I have been struggling for a while now with internet addiction. I have tried to stop countless times and always failed. I am married with children. My wife is aware that I have a problem with watching movies and tv shows online. I can go a whole day watching films whenever I have a free moment. I am usually pretty good about not watching inappropriate movies, however every once in a while I slip up and watch one inappropriate film . I am ready to stop, I have applied the necessary filters(K9), and watchchaver, my wife has the passwords. I have just finished my first 24 hours and and I am looking forward to making real change in my life.

Welcome aboard! You've already made a good start. Hatzlacha!

Welcome!
Sounds like the first half of a good plan.
The second half is what you're going to do instead. On a regular basis. Include renewing relationships with people you care about, exercise, maybe a chavrusa.

Welcome aboard shlomo...

Congratulations on your first 24 hours. As they say around here, all we have is today. So if you can do today, just keep doing today, again and again, forever and a day. But we need to be aware that the YH is forever lurking, and we must forever be vigilant. A slight slip can quickly become a big fall ch"v. So we need to be extra careful with what we look at and even what we think about.

Hatzlacha! Stick around and enjoy some real progress.

MT

Okay i am finishing my second day. I am getting ready to go to sleep. I have succeeded in not giving into my temptation and masterbating. I have a strong want to give in. What should i do?

Keep busy. Do something, anything to keep busy. Or take some melatonin and go to sleep.

Then daven (a lot)

Welcome and Hatzlacha.

shlomoanonymous wrote on 25 Oct 2012 03:00:


Not sure I can tell you what you should do, but I can tell you what you should not do, as the GYE handbook puts it:

One addict who is already sober for 20 years likes to say, “Just for today, I won’t act-out even if my backside falls off!” (And guess what? It never did! :-).

Hatzlacha

MT

I have found that when I guard my eyes vigilantly, not even checking out my own wife outside the bedroom, and guard my mind against thoughts about sex (again, even about my wife), then the urge to masturbate is significantly weakened, even nonexistent.

Okay, I have made it 48 hours. I couldn't sleep last night, but I succeeded in resisting my urge. I have just started the 90 day challenge. I can't wait to succeed another day. It's crazy as I am writing this message I realize my hand is moving in the wrong direction, B"H I caught myself. Thanks for all the support and advise.

shlomoanonymous wrote on 25 Oct 2012 16:15:


If you want to make it 72 try to get yourself to sleep soon.

Shlomo,
It sounds like you're trying really, really hard. Which is great. It means you're really motivated -- maybe because you have come to realize that you can't go on living like you've been. But simply wanting to quit and fighting urges, for an addict, is typically not enough. We call it "white knuckling."

Personally, I tried to quit many times. Until I came here and learned that I was an addict. And learned a skill called surrender. When I feel any urges -- be it the urge to entertain lewd thoughts, look where I shouldn't, or more -- I verbally surrender that urge to Hashem and ask him to take it from me, to fight it FOR me, because I am unable to fight it on my own. Baruch Hashem, for He has done so for me, one day at a time.

Now don't get all excited. He didn't take my Y"H. He just helps me when I ask sincerely, telling Him I that I honestly don't want to lust.

@shlomoanonymous,

I'm anxiously awaiting to see your name on the 90 day chart tomorrow

Knock 'em dead :-)

alexeliezer wrote on 25 Oct 2012 17:00:


White knuckling it is only when you think about sex freely but just don't act out. It's not white knuckling it if you don't do the thoughts.

I have been doing research into the 12 step problem. One of the issues I have with it is I want to be able to move past my struggles. I don't think it is healthy to talk and think about sex all the time. Even these forums, right now they are helping me tremendously, I am not sure if I would want to be on forever. I am not saying to ever remove the filter and accountability from our lives. It is still important to know that you have someone looking over your shoulder and will help you if you stumble. However to deal in these issues all the time is it really good?
What do you think?
I am sure this has come up many times, and I would love to hear feedback on what other people think.
Thank you again.
On a side note i registered for the 90 challenge as I am in my third day even though it hasn't been 72 hours yet.