Hi all, I am very new to the whole concept of a forum as I have never used one, so I will need to get used to it. But for now more Important is for to to get proper chizuk so that I can finally stop getting in Hashem way, and HIM to do the fight for me.

I will update this chart with my story as soon as I get this figured out. But until then I ask for some chizuk. I need it all.

Thanks.

Welcome, brother!
There is plenty of tools on this site for a hard-worker.
Have you read the GYE in the Nutshel yet?
Subscribe to daily chizuk emails, read the Attitue Handbook (it's done wonders for me), and share your story and your journey on the forum here.
Hatzlocho,
Mottel
P.S. they call me Mottel around here, 'cause that's my name.

Welcome Newbi,

You found the right place, I found the chizuk emails to be a major chizuk boost during the day. Just take one minute, hour, day at a time.

Share with us the whole story and watch how you make wonderful friends in no time, friends who "understand" you, and friends who "really" care for you.

just "Keep Climbing". even if you make some detours and rest stops on the way as long as your climbing.

Welcome!

I highly recommend the attitude section of the handbook. Its more than chizuk its the proper perspective on this issue.
Just Keep Going
Lol KC "just keep climbing" I wonder what the philosophical difference is between "climbing" and "going".....?

Hi Newbi and welcome aboard!

As the others already said, look around, read the handbooks and emails, you will quickly find the Mehalech that will work for you.

Keep on [s]climbing[/s] [s]going[/s] Trucking! (even if you make some detours and rest stops on the way)

And keep posting, soon you won't be a Newbi anymore!

Gevura!

Well I must say, you have definitely made the right choice about coming here for help!
Well Done!

Fist of all have a good read around the forum and GYE, download shiurim, download and read the Handbook, sign up for the Daily Chizuk emails, sign up to the 90 Day Chart! And you are making fast progress already!

Its amazing, so many people think they are "getting in Hashem's way" by lusting.
I don't think this is true.

Lets start from the beginning,
Hashem created this wondrous and incredible world, with many different problems, dangers, illnesses, worries and so on.
Hashem created us humans, with even more problems, worries, Yetzer Horas, trial and tribulations, anxieties, depressions, illnesses and so on and so fourth.
Why?
WHY??
WHY???
Because Hashem loves us!
Huh?
(Hashem please put the right words into my tiny and undeveloped brain. I do not know if what I am writing/thinking is correct. BUT YOU DO!)
Yes thats right!
BECAUSE HASHEM LOVES US!

Now if Hashem loves us, then why on earth, do we have all of these tests and troubles, trials and tribulations??
Because HASHEM LOVES US!!
okay...I think we may be getting somewhere

Hashem put us in this world on a 120 year incessant battle with the evil inclination.
The reason for all our tests are simple.
We need to GROW.
We need to come closer to Hashem.
The only way for us to get closer to Hashem is by fighting the Yetzer Hora, over and over again.
By passing our tests.
And by realizing that we are totally helpless and hopeless without Hashem.
Only then do we see the truth.

We need to beg Hashem to help us, in whatever we are struggling with in life!
Hashem gave us these tests, for a reason.
It does not matter whether we pass them or not!
As long as we do the very best we possibly can to pass it then its fine.

We know that Hashem loves us because otherwise we wouldn't be here. We wouldn't have all the Nisyonos every day.

Hashem has given us this magnificent world with so many amazing creations and wonders.
Just stop and think for a second.
Lets take a brief look at what Hashem has so kindly given us,
Well for a start we are Jewish! Hashem is our dear Father in Heaven, who is always right by our side, no matter how low we may feel.
In fact when a person is low in Kedusha it is then that Hashem is closest to him. Because if a person uses that time when he feels low to get up instead and to understand that Hashem is always there for him, then he will truly grow and be lifted up higher and higher in Kedusha!

Think about everyday life, that we simply take for granted as if we are meant to have it all, as if it all belongs to us.
Every breath is a miracle!
Every Brain Impulse is a miracle!
look at all the goodness that Hashem odes for us every single day, that Hashem has done for us throughout the ages!

Baruch Hashem! Thank You Hashem!
I have a unique and amazing family that is made just for me!
I have friends!
I have GYE!
I have LIFE!!
I have YOU!!!

Everything comes from Hashem our loving Father in Heaven!
Everything Hashem does is for our very best! So next time something annoying happens and you feel like screaming! Stop and think for a second! Compose yourself! Remind yourself.
HASHEM LOVES ME!
THIS IS FOR MY VERY BEST!

So now, lets see, ARE WE REALLY GETTING IN HASHEM'S WAY?
No! Absolutely Not!
Just the OPPOSITE!
Hashem has put these tests here for us, for our benefit!

WOW! That is a different way of looking at it.

All of what is written here came straight from Hashem. I asked Hashem to help me write this. He did!
most of it I took from this beautiful video clip called:
Can you guess?
Hashem Loves ME!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=eTmlyTdTn0Y&feature=player_embedded />
I have learnt so much from Rabbi Lazer Brody, this is where I got a lot of my Chizuk from: lazerbrody.typepad.com/ />
May Hashem help us to have Hatzlocha Rabboh in passing all our tests and to have true Emuna Sheleima - Complete belief in Hashem.

Refoel, beautiful words. You don't sound like a newbie.(Maybe you're the Benzi we miss?)

JustKeepGoing, we seem to be crossing paths here quite a bit. Let me take the defensive and explain the difference in our names. I found that just plain "going" wasn't really taking me anywhere, after all that's what i've been doing all along, I felt I needed more, I need to climb and make progress. Get it? No offense. Still friends?

Newbi, we're all looking forward to hear your progress and what specifically worked for you.

Just keep going, climbing, trucking, hummering. As long as we don't stand still. That's just recipe for disaster.

Hatzlacha

Wow I must start off saying, I'm just amazed at the time that everyone takes to respond, and to give chizuk. It really means a lot. I hope to be able to give back.

Refoel, I want to clarify what meant "getting in Hashem way". I have been doing a lot of reading, the emails, diff posts as well as handbook. And there have been many times that I felt Hashem was truly fighting for me, and hes the best fighter as we all know. But then I got in the, meaning even though I felt him fighting I decided to lock my self in the bathroom and fall. I should've just stayed out of the battle field and I would've gotten thru.

I would like to add too. That sometimes the moment after a fall is a great stepping stone to move forward at least one step sometimes even two. I don't mean by getting depressed over the fall, thereby falling even deeper. I mean that usually right after a fall one feels like, "oh gosh how stupid am I...." so many time at least for me it will compell me to do something them and there to prevent another fall.
For instance, I am a big smartphone, tablet(iPad) freak and I have a couple hundred apps, when I fall instantly I will delete any app that I can find a browser on. I should add that I have the phone locked and I use k9, app store is locked as well as iTunes.... By my friends wife so she must unlock if I need to download and I kno how to dig up many was to come across a browser. But after a fall I will quickly go thru apps to see what has to be deleted. And it helps me feel a little better, to brush my self off and tell yetzer hara to get lost.

Keep Climbing, I have been around GYE for a good few months now and with Hashem's help doing well and making good progress Baruch Hashem!
However, Just today I got the courage together to actually post on the forum.
So, no, I am not "the Benzi" you miss, sorry about that.

Oh well at least I tried to find a friend we miss dearly.

You mention that you are b"h making nice progress, can we hear more about it? Why not share your success? It's part of the recovery process, no?

Keep climbing going.......

Lol KC I hear what your saying, the only real difference is you have to be going towards a goal, I agree "just going" aimlessly won't do much good. Which is pretty much trying to beat the yetzer by just wanting harder.

Did you know shteiging really means climbing in yiddish?

Newbie, did you read the handbook on atitude yet?
"I decided to lock my self in the bathroom and fall"
It sounds like you need to work on not wanting to lust, ya you can you win some battles, but you said it yourself, you still want to fall (don't worry I'm in the same boat)
You (we) have to not WANT the fantasy world. Not want it and fight ourselves and go crazy.- I want it. I DON'T want it-but I DO argh!!!!!!!!! *bash head into wall* etc you know the drill

Keep on keepin' on!

P.S. When I said were in the same boat that was meant figuratively. Don't worry. You are not actually on a boat.

Just keep going, I've been trying to figure out for the last 10 minutes what you mean by a goal. What really is the goal? Of course the goal is to be sober=no p**n, m*s**n, shemiras einayim. But I have a feeling i'm missing some very essential piece of information here.
thought anyone?

KC

It helps me to say at the beginning of each day:
I give up my right to fantasize for today.

Keep wrote on 10 Jul 2012 05:36:


I once heard a tape from R Noach Weinberg zt'l from the 48 ways I believe it was "happiness." In the class he says that happiness isn't the goal. Its not a goal in itself. True, you ned to strive for a goal of hapiness but now what? Your living to be happy?

So the messilat yesharim says we were created l'hitaneg al hashem. Through torah and mitzvot we are mashlim ourselves and can come to love hashem and be midabek ourselves to him. Making ourselves like the creator by approaching life the way he wants us to.
So back to happiness R Weinberg was saying you need happiness, to live life! A guy who's depressed has no zest for life no zing! Similarly addiction to lust. Ya its tremendously important to get out of lust, heck just to live you need to get out of lust, but then what? Now were left with what do we do? So b"h we have some guidance with what the purpose of our lives are for.

I read a story, I think referenced from gye, about a goy who worked on overcoming his masterbation addiction, and he logged it and took records, and notes. Eventually he wrote that he was at a point when he felt he could live the rest of his life without it.

......
But he didn't. Because for him there was no point. What else does he live for?

So my goal is to acquire the Torah mind and the Torah way of living, eventually establish a Torah home, and well take it from there.

But the point I'm trying to make is that your asking, what's the goal and yet you say of course this is the goal. So your right, the goal is to get clean, but then when your clean what's the bigger picture goal? So were lucky we have an answer for that otherwise like the story with the goy, what is the point there's no point to anything that way.

I might be COMPLETELY misunderstanding you but if what I think you mean to ask is what your asking then this is what I mean to answer

Wow amazing words and insight.

Didn't think of it like that. But it's very true.
Chazak!!!