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Hello, I need chizuk
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Hello, I need chizuk 15 Dec 2011 04:28 #128557

  • Needyjew
Hi everyone. I'm a teenage boy suffering from acting out. I'm not that addicted but addicted enough that it is interfering with my relationship to HAshem and my work habits. I really want to stop doing this garbage so I came here. PleAse help give me some chi um and suggestions of how to deal with this.
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Re: Hello, I need chizuk 15 Dec 2011 16:06 #128579

  • aamallen
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Hi there
first off kol hakavod for posting - it hard at your age to realize how much of a problem this is and how serious it is.  The fact that you are here is allready a good first step.  Someone will send you the links to the handbooks etc.  but that a good place to start.

Also important - are you in a good envirnoment spiritually -
do you have unfiltered internet ?
What are your triggers ?
answering some of these questions for yourself will give you insight to how you need to stop and what to pull away from.

the next step is to start filling your days with as much activity as possible - school , learning , activites ( sports etc.) that way you wil have much less time to wander the net and get into trouble

Good luck -we are here for you!!!
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Re: Hello, I need chizuk 15 Dec 2011 16:12 #128581

  • gibbor120
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WELCOME Needyjew,  you have come to the right place.  The sooner you face this problem, the better.  Here's the official welcome package with lots of good information.  Take some time to go over it.  Hang around, you will find your own path to recovery. HATZLACHA!

Welcome to our community, you have finally come home!

GuardYourEyes (GYE) is a vibrant network and fellowship of Jews of all affiliations, struggling to purify themselves and break free of lust related behaviors. For the first time, there is somewhere to turn to for help in these areas. We're all in the same boat here. Tzuras Rabim Chatzi Nechama  .  Once you've arrived, there's no turning back. Everyone here will just grab a hold of you and pull you up with them!
 
In the last couple of years, the GYE network has helped roughly 1,000 Jews get back on a path of sanity, self-control and healing and has touched the lives of thousands more. GYE has become known throughout the Jewish world as the number one address for dealing with these challenges which have reached epidemic proportions. 

The tools of our recovery program were developed with guidance from the best experts in the field, such as Rabbi Dr. Avraham J. Twerski, and through the personal experience of hundreds of Jews who successfully broke free. We use a unique approach that recognizes that there are many different levels in these struggles.

Our network is comprised of a website, a pulsating forum, phone conferences, daily Chizuk e-mails, support hotlines, therapists, live 12-Step groups and a program of recovery for all levels of this struggle/addiction.

All our work is free of charge and we zealously protect the complete anonymity of all our members.

Here are some quick things you can do to help you jump straight into your journey:

1) See the "GYE Program in a Nutshell" (Right Click the link and press "Save Link/Target As" to save the PDF file to your computer) that can help you quickly identify at what level of the struggle you are at, and which tools and features would help you most at your particular level.

2) Install a strong filter (see this page for more info). It is hard to break free of this while having all the garbage within a mouse click away.  The filter gabai at filter.gye@gmail.com will hold the passwords for you. We also highly advise installing "Reporting Software" such as webchaver.org to give you some accountability.

3) Join the daily Chizuk e-mail lists to get fresh chizuk every day.

4) Join the 90 Day Challenge. Scientific studies have shown that it takes 90 days to change the neuron pathways created by addictive behaviors in the brain.

5) Post away on this forum, where hundreds of yidden like you exchange chizuk and post logs of their journey to recovery. You will internalize that you are not alone, and you will learn the techniques and attitude that work for so many others.

6) Join our free anonymous phone conferences, led by an experienced sponsor.

7) If you need more general guidance, write to GYE’s helpline at gye.help@gmail.com or call the hotline at 646-600-8100.

8.) Download and read the "Guard Your Eyes Handbook" (a hard copy can be purchased for cost price over here). This handbook outlines the GYE approach in detail, and makes our network much more effective and helpful for people. The handbook has two parts:

A) The first part, "The 20 Tools", detail suggested tools and techniques, in progressive order, beginning with the most basic and fundamental approaches to dealing with this addiction, and continuing down through increasingly earnest and powerful methods. No matter what level our addiction may have advanced to, we will be able to find the right tools to break free in this handbook!

The second part, "Attitude & Perspective", detail 30 basic principles to help us maintain the proper attitude and perspective on this struggle. Here are some examples: Understanding what we are up against, what it is that Hashem wants from us, how we can use this struggle for tremendous growth, how we can deal with bad thoughts, discovering how to redirect the power of our souls, understanding that every little bit counts, learning how to bounce back up after a fall, and so on and so forth…


Our souls cry inside of us, but we have accustomed ourselves to block out that cry. Today we can begin to be who we really want to be.

We are here for you.
www.GuardYourEyes.org
GYE E-Mail Helpline: gye.help@gmail.com
GYE Phone Hotline: 646-600-8100
Help us help others: Donate Here
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Re: Hello, I need chizuk 18 Dec 2011 02:09 #128667

  • AlexEliezer
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Welcome young friend!
So so happy to have you here.  Because you want to stop.  And you can stop before this taiva takes over even more than it has.

Read a lot here.  Post often, keep us in the loop.
Train yourself to avert your gaze from women, tznius or otherwise, live or in pics.
When lustful thoughts come knocking, start davening, asking Hashem to take your lust.
Don't let yourself be fully undressed for any longer than necessary.
Keep very busy.
Don't linger on the computer.
Don't pick up mainstream mags or newspapers.

In brief: Guard your eyes, guard your mind, daven for syata dishmaya in this area, and keep very busy.

Welcome!
Alex
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Re: Hello, I need chizuk 18 Dec 2011 07:10 #128686

  • Pure yid
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Don't beet you self up, just try your best and by coming here you'll be good. I mean for your age to do this step of joining here, is major
Keep coming back, it works if you work it, so work it, you're worth it.
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