I’m so glad I B”H found this website through a blog (discussing the Onesh of Z”L on a funny way).

I’m a frum Bachur- student at the age of shidduchim and realize I must regain control of my life before I fall even much deeper.

I’m struggling and suffering from my addiction for over 4 years and was always hoping that I would get over it but …

I suffer (when I’m not clean) from  concentration, fluent speech (some words are hard to pronounce), unexpected problems out-of-nowhere (fines, failed tests, lose my money and investments on various bizar ways, shidduchim problems) , lack of interest in my hobbies- jiddishkeit- friends- studies- success in anything I do, empty feeling, etc.

Then when I’m clean for a while I just wish I could keep it that way and have a normal life, but then comes that evening where I feel bored, lack of excitement, tired, and hope that the watching and acting out will make me feel better, but after I fall in the illusion-trap, I immediately regret it and take a shower to minimize the depressing feelings.

So I’m glad I finally found you guys and thank Hashem for getting me here!

Welcome my friend have a seat..

make yourself comfy we dont want you to be a visitor.

I can relate to all the above and being a black belt is aint gonna do it for this fight.

He is stronger then the blackbelt have you noticed that yet? It's time for a new approach..

You came to the right place. let me find the welcome post for you

HOld on...........

here u go-

Welcome to our community, you have finally come home!

GuardYourEyes (GYE) is a vibrant network and fellowship of Jews of all affiliations, struggling to purify themselves and break free of lust related behaviors. For the first time, there is somewhere to turn to for help in these areas. We're all in the same boat here. Tzuras Rabim Chatzi Nechama  .  Once you've arrived, there's no turning back. Everyone here will just grab a hold of you and pull you up with them!
 
In the last couple of years, the GYE network has helped roughly 1,000 Jews get back on a path of sanity, self-control and healing and has touched the lives of thousands more. GYE has become known throughout the Jewish world as the number one address for dealing with these challenges which have reached epidemic proportions. 

The tools of our recovery program were developed with guidance from the best experts in the field, such as Rabbi Dr. Avraham J. Twerski, and through the personal experience of hundreds of Jews who successfully broke free. We use a unique approach that recognizes that there are many different levels in these struggles.

Our network is comprised of a website, a pulsating forum, phone conferences, daily Chizuk e-mails, support hotlines, therapists, live 12-Step groups and a program of recovery for all levels of this struggle/addiction.

All our work is free of charge and we zealously protect the complete anonymity of all our members.

Here are some quick things you can do to help you jump straight into your journey:

1) See the "GYE Program in a Nutshell" (Right Click the link and press "Save Link/Target As" to save the PDF file to your computer) that can help you quickly identify at what level of the struggle you are at, and which tools and features would help you most at your particular level.

2) Install a strong filter (see this page for more info). It is hard to break free of this while having all the garbage within a mouse click away.  The filter gabai at filter.gye@gmail.com will hold the passwords for you. We also highly advise installing "Reporting Software" such as webchaver.org to give you some accountability.

3) Join the daily Chizuk e-mail lists to get fresh chizuk every day.

4) Join the 90 Day Challenge. Scientific studies have shown that it takes 90 days to change the neuron pathways created by addictive behaviors in the brain.

5) Post away on this forum, where hundreds of yidden like you exchange chizuk and post logs of their journey to recovery. You will internalize that you are not alone, and you will learn the techniques and attitude that work for so many others.

6) Join our free anonymous phone conferences, led by an experienced sponsor.

7) If you need more general guidance, write to GYE’s helpline at gye.help@gmail.com or call the hotline at 646-600-8100.

8.) Download and read the "Guard Your Eyes Handbook" (a hard copy can be purchased for cost price over here). This handbook outlines the GYE approach in detail, and makes our network much more effective and helpful for people. The handbook has two parts:

A) The first part, "The 20 Tools", detail suggested tools and techniques, in progressive order, beginning with the most basic and fundamental approaches to dealing with this addiction, and continuing down through increasingly earnest and powerful methods. No matter what level our addiction may have advanced to, we will be able to find the right tools to break free in this handbook!

The second part, "Attitude & Perspective", detail 30 basic principles to help us maintain the proper attitude and perspective on this struggle. Here are some examples: Understanding what we are up against, what it is that Hashem wants from us, how we can use this struggle for tremendous growth, how we can deal with bad thoughts, discovering how to redirect the power of our souls, understanding that every little bit counts, learning how to bounce back up after a fall, and so on and so forth…

Our souls cry inside of us, but we have accustomed ourselves to block out that cry. Today we can begin to be who we really want to be.

We are here for you.
www.GuardYourEyes.org
GYE E-Mail Helpline: gye.help@gmail.com
GYE Phone Hotline: 646-600-8100
Help us help others: Donate Here

WELCOME!  May this be the first courageous step of many to recovery!

heeeeeeeeeeeeeeee- yah!

or hello



welcome,
browse around, read the welcome package, you will see many others who are in similar circumstances and b'ezras hashem were able to get to a better place.
wishing you much success
zs

Interesting that you have such a strong reaction when you act out -- that your whole life gets messed up.  That seems somewhat unique.  You must have a very special and unique neshama.

Before there were purple belts, yellow belts, orange belts, it was just white belt, green belt, black belt.  Every student started with a white belt.  When he was thrown to the ground enough times, his grass-stained belt told the story.  Only the sturdy few who were knocked down enough times earned the distinction of sensei, their experience recorded by their blackened belt, worn with pride.

A blackbelt knows it is better to run than to fight.  He has nothing to prove.  There are no more colors to earn.  It hurts less to avoid the fight.

How to avoid lust?  Guard your eyes in all settings.  Keep far from computers and magazines.  When lustful thoughts come, daven over and over.

Domo Arigato for joining us!
Alex

Thanks for all the nice and funny comments,

I really feel empowered and strong by joining you pro's (blackbelts) in the challenge, this forum seems to make me feel much better when I'm dealing with those bored moments at night.

Welcome.  I have three important words to tell you.  consider it the shortest maimar you'll ever hear:  Get A Filter.

hatzlocho.,  don't be a stranger