(Above from chovos ha'livavos, Sha'ar Ha'bitachon)

A 'frum' guy can get so damn worked up and scared over $$$ to the point of mamosh hatred towards another yid, loshen hara, and violence. And of course porn and masturbation...

And then turn around and even BEGIN to say that a fry, simple, honest yid is probably a 'shagetz'!?!?!?!

"Mindboggling".. Is an understatement.

You're both yidden.

He's never been shown Hashem.. And honestly it seems that you haven't been either.

You're doing nothing more than living a 'culturally' jewish life, which never had Hashem there in the 1st place.

BH gratitiude is all I can say to describe where Hashen has put me today. As I walk the world dressed as one of 'tzivos Hashem' in the 'army uniform', I can actually look the world in the eye, and even deep in to the heart of the world, and feel deserving of the position. Jewish integrity is a gift only from heaven itself!

One of my favorite Torahs of all time; for a good healthy perspective on life.

Pirkey Avos ch 5.

"The world was created with ten utterances.  What is this teaching us? Certainly, it could have been created with a single utterance. However, this is in order to make the wicked accountable for destroying a world that was created with ten utterances, and to reward the righteous for sustaining a world that was created with ten utterances."

It's a basic essential principle that Hashem is the essence of goodness..  "G-d's kindness is all day", "the world is built with kindness", "G-d with his goodness, every day and moment, renews creation"... Etc.

So here is our loving and kind G-d deciding to make a world, and he was so mad at people that didn't even exist yet so the 'very 1st thing on His mind', before even the tzadikim, is beating up reshoyim!?

He don't sound too nice to me..



Anyone who's learned the laws, and seforim on monetary damages and payments, knows that "to collect payment" in loshen kodesh is "l'purah" .

Interestingly, this mishna uses the same word for  what Hashem wants from the reshayim: l'hi'purah... "To cause them to give payment" (it does not at all say to punish them)

What in G-d's name could a Rasha possibly have that is so precious (even before tzadikim), that makes G-d pursue him 1st to get him to "pay it back" to G-d??


Teshuva.


We were intentionally created imperfect; with a strong inclination to sin, and the wonderful ability to do teshuva! The greatest nachas above, yes even higher than the avodas ha'tzadikim, is from our teshuva.

Indeed the very 1st thing which motivated Him to have a world, was having imperfect, struggling people (like us) and an imperfect world, as the major ingredients in His plan.  Watching us grow,  striving to repair ourselves together with our portion in the world around us, causes unimaginable heavenly delight above.

Only those of us who know VERY WELL the 'taste of sin', can understand what it means to 'destroy, in a miraculous way,  a (normal) world that was created with 10 utterances' ('10' is the way the world is arranged 'according to plan').

The ba'al teshuva is the one who learns to  'break through' the normal patterns of connecting to Hashem and 'squeeze' extra energy and resources out of himself  to re-connect to kedusha.
"Zedonos na'aseh l'zochious!" (Intentional sins actually become merits!! We gather MORE merits than the 'normal' pattern)


For sure the straight and narrow 'good guys', the tzadikim, aren't off course in anything. They are "sustaining a world that was created with ten utterances", and keeping things "according to plan". With time, we also learn how to function again in this world 'according to plan.'

Inevitably however, in select moments throughout any day, we blessed ones  have the gift(!) of feeling: "what I see is not enough".."My heart needs more Hashem". We make an extra call, do an extra good deed, spread an extra smile, and happily lend an extra hand to someone in need.  We have an inner 'necessity' for a deeper connection, and we are 'always' (sometimes more, sometimes less)  motivated us to break the normal run of the mill pattern,  thereby destroying "the normal' world that was created with ten utterances."


So our 'sinning' was indeed 'part of the plan' to begin with, so that Hashem would have our Teshuva after.

Serene smile,your posts are uplifting.keep them coming. The chovos halevovos that you mentioned is so important for us to remember. Everyone goes through ups and downs in his job or business and keeping the ch. Halevovos front and center will help us overcome RID when it strikes. I had what I thougth was a setback in business and I did some crazy stuff in my RID filled time. Now I am going through a similar situation and constant thinking about hashem is helping me cope.
Maalin

(For whatever it's worth, I learned Sha'ar Ha'bitachon 6 times all the way through..... Combined with all the other tools, it changed everything... To the side of good)

The whole world knows the phrase "chosen people"...

The secular jews focus on the 'people' part: "hey, we're all equal! All people are completely equal. No one is better at all."

The frum (traditionally) focus on the 'chosen' part: "of course! We're chosen and better. For sure holier and can do whatever we want!"

A balance in the middle seems to be not only healthy, but most importantly, reality.

I read yur torah on avos.mamash gevaldig! it was mechazaik me very much in my situation.

I remember the 1st time I heard it, and how an unusual feeling of 'completion' came over me. As opposed to my normal 'confused' state of mind,  I was uplifted on the spot. It' one of the foundations of how I've been approaching life ever since. It's a big blessing to share here :-)

Its a great vort,and the yesod answers so many kashes its poshut that its emes.

I don't know why, even though I know the concept the piece just made a roshem on me too.

Thanks

At Mount Sinai, tradition tells, there was no echo.

Torah penetrates and is absorbed by all things, because it is their essence. There is no place where it does not apply, no darkness it does not illuminate, nothing it cannot bring alive. Nothing will bounce it back and say, "Torah is too holy to belong here."

 

Hottest day in summer in NYC in 2009 was 80 something. BH rode bike to work all summer. 2010 was high 90's.. I didn ride at all... I'm hoping to ride this summer... My brain NEEEEEEDS it!

Going biking now, could use it too.
Had a rough night and morning. Somehow after the high of shvuous I found myself clicking away at the computer first for muter stuff then for the worst stuff i could find. My filter is really strong and I barely saw anything but I could barely recognize myself after. Am I the same guy who learned all shvuous night? The answer is i am and the yetzer hara knows when to creep in and shlep me down but with hashems help I wont let him.

Wow. The tomay 'creepy things' are right after Nadav V'avihu passed way in the highest form of spiritual bliss!! (U ever saw the Or Ha'Chayim Ha'kodesh about them!?!)...

To teach us: YES! Even after the greatest high, be careful!!! The greatest low is lurking around the corner.

(And oh yes: bike all ready.. Be"H.. Monday here we come :-) )