Chevra,

I had just an epic realization as I am preparing myself for this last Shabbos of the year.

As I stood in front of HKB"H last year on the Yom Ha'Din I have no recollection of actually asking for the gift of sobriety this year. In fact on the contrary I kind of remember feeling hopelessly and helplessly doomed to die as an addict only to face the revelation of my secrets to all at the end of my days. As painful and depressing as this thought was it was never enough to get me into recovery, and I was tired of repeated failures of trying to stop on my own without the 12 step program.

Now pause for a moment and think about what I just wrote. I wasn't even asking for recovery last year at this time. I was convinced that I had no way out.

As I prepare for this last Shabbos of the year, I feel full of life and full of emotions. I can feel this way in spite of the immense personal struggles I have been going through this week. It doesn't make any sense to me that this can even be possible (I just pinched myself to make sure that I'm not dreaming).

My friends, the essence of my message is this - Yeshuas Hashem K'Heref Ayin. Hashem can bring about salvation in the blink of an eye. It makes no sense that such a thing can be possible, but at whatever time HKB"H decides to give us the gifts of "serenity to accept the things we cannot change and the courage to change the things we can", from that instant it can be a Techiyas Maysim for those of us have been the walking dead in our addiction.

If it can happen to me then it can happen to anyone, and if you ask me how then you already know the answer! The answer is H - O - W
Honesty
Openness
Willingness

May we all be zocheh to the Yeshuas Hashem this year!

yidintrouble wrote on 11 Sep 2015 21:11:

"Walkin' dead in our addiction" - I believe Rabbi Wachsman said that last night at the Focus event.