installed webchaver. yay.
this will work for me and my brother home from yeshiva for sukkot. i don' t know why but i trust it a lot more than k9, maybe b/c i already know how to hack k9 and not this one, but im hoping its for better reasons like that, for example being harder to hack would be nice.

stupid thing is, so i put my friend as my chaver, but now he'll know i'm on guardyoureyes.org. doi- what should i do about that?

Why does he know you're on GYE? All he knows is that you need a chaver...either way, though, you can just explain that you want to grow and be careful in this area, and you trust him and need his help.

I think that's pretty smart, actually.

Keep pushing in the right direction !

Why be embarrassed >... be proud! 8)

Many if not most men are nichshel in shmiras eynayim, and many (hopefully not most) don't do anything constructive to improve.

you are!

Even if your friend does know you are in GYE he won't know you are "desperate teddybear" as long as you erase this thread before he surfs the Forum.
Good luck to you and your brother.

i guess the reason im embarrassed is that the person im trusting as a chaver is someone who i look up to very much for being a tzadik.
when he gets the list of sites i visited he'll see i visited GYE ALOT and he'll know i'm messed up. i mean yeah im fixing it but this person's a really temimusdik guy who only visits the internet for email and that sort of thing.
i doubt he even knows the problem exists in the fum community and for him to know that i have the issue is mortifying. he's my role model i don't want him to think this of me.

i guess kutan's right i should just talk to him about the fact im working on shmiras einayim and thats why im always on this site- but that will call even more attention to it etc "the lady doth protest too much" and whatnot.

argh. so embarassing. i'm thinking- i'll make sure to visit a bunch of other frum sites on self-improvement a couple times a day as well so it doesn't look so bad...BB's right- he won't know my specific issue he won't be able to tell who i am on the forum he'll just know im visiting. for all he knows im just on there for a bissle chizuk.

Hi there...don't know if you've read my thread yet, or not. Check it out, though - at least the beginning. I began to seriously work on myself in this area almost a year ago, after my rebbe found out. And you know what? He's proud of me now. He's impressed. I'm talking about a very chashuve rebbe in a big, mainstream yeshiva.

Because he knows how much of a challenge this is, and he knows how impressive it is to work on it, and grow in this area. I'm not saying it didn't feel horrible that he knew - but his chizuk helped tremendously. And I'm happy to know how proud he is of me.

Be proud.

I dont think that wwb chaver will report kosher sites. I think only questionable ones. Check for sure.

Frumfiend The star wrote on 20 Sep 2010 16:13:


frumfiend, you're awesome. i checked it out and there's a setting for whether or not i want reported top 20 sites visited most often or not. otherwise it just puts in the 'questionables'.

otherwise yeah, SB is right id just have had to suck it up and deal with the blow to my fragile ego- recovery is most important thing....maybe in a way it's better for someone you respect to know, but personally don't feel ready for that.

i notice that a lot about myself, i guess it's because in elementary school i was a complete dork. i don't ever want people thinking less of me in any way.
i have to work on that.

You could always tell him that you're Guard!

There are no dorks on this Forum. The dorks look around as guests for a while and let the Yetzer Horo tell them not to join. Dorks secretly watch p**n and then go to a secret place to m*******e for decades and never try to get any serious help. There are no losers here either. We are all winners.

Please trust kutan... a true tzadik will only be impressed... now that you are working on the issue, you can be proud!

See (actually, listen to:)
www.guardureyes.com/GUE/Music/mus/ShiurYesodos.mp3

No one can or will guess what you actually did in the past... all they know is that you have urges to look where it is best not to (and almost everyone does) and that YOU are working hard at it.

In today's generation, you have no idea how precious and special that is!

thanks guys.
so...listen...does it get any easier? like quitting smoking?

or is it always this hard? i don't know how much longer i can hold out.

im trying not to fight it, im trying to just see it as biting my nails- you know, a bad habit you're trying to break that is breakable.

when can i stop being scared to get into bed at night?

It does get easier, but the fight is never over.
Everyone is different, the main thing is don't worry about or ask "how long" questions.

If you can deal with right now you're ok. Later you can deal with later.

One day at a time. Give one more day to hashem. Think about somthing special that hashem did for you