INH,

A fall which leads to such personal insights may be more of a mitzvah than aveira in my little mind.
A fall which leads to depression or giving up is exactly what the yh wants.
But if the fall is the catalyst bringing you closer to Hashem...I can only think that to be good!

But anyway, may all future growth be through climbs and not falls,

7up

Hey Rabbosai,

Thanks for the generous words 7up. I need to find a way to not mask my stress. I need to embrace and understand that its all from Hashem no matter what. Stress, anxiety, depression, and the like may all stem from our lack of complete Emunah in Hashem. Anyine have any advice on how to do this?

-INH

You're on Duvid Chaim's calls, that's a big step in the right direction...

Maybe some stuff on this page could work for you: www.guardureyes.com/GUE/Tips/SelfTher.asp

Ineedhelp!! wrote on 09 Nov 2009 18:03:



I can only share what helped me get there:
Hugs!
Make a point of actively noticing all the good Hashem does for you every step of the way through your day. It takes effort and time, but once you start recognizing all His 'hugs', you begin to internalize that if He is there for such 'minor' issues like good lunch and the right bus, then kal vechomer He is carrying you for the biggies.
Check out the HUGS thread.
And start posting!

INH - You are a very lucky man to have insight as you do, and friends like these!!

Thanks Dov,'

I really love this place. Is there a GUE Addicts Anonymous??????

-INH

Ineedhelp!! wrote on 11 Nov 2009 16:41:


Someone  tried setting one up -
-but none of us were willing to join!
We love this addiction too much!
R' Dov; any advice, or are we beyond help?

Hey everyone,

I fell today again. Hopefully Hashem will bring me back up.

-INH

7Up wrote on 11 Nov 2009 21:08:

Oy, you took the words right out of my brain.

INH - You may need more support than you are getting, particularly the non-virtual kind. After all, our problem isn't just "virtual"...

thanks Dov for the advise but Im not really sure what you mean????

I am absolutely positive that, in my case, there was no substitute for biting the bullet and meeting to talk in person with other guys who were sober. Specifically other guys who were at least as bad off as I was (or worse) to start with (in fact, worse off was better, cuz it proved more to me of the power of recovery!). We know exactly what it feels like to think of something that is totally self-destructive and to desire it anyway. We know the excruciating pain of not acting out our mishigas'n - even though they are totally nuts. So we are not ashamed of admitting it to eachother, thank G-d, and can finally get and remain completely honest about it with somebody.
How long will the addict remain afraid to get the gruesome details - in all their shameful stupidity - out into the light? That is how long they will probably hold sway over him. (tzetel koton is similar on this)...and that will be just the very first step, you know. G-d has a lot of work to do on us, cuz we can get a lot better, you know. Stop accepting the scraps off the table. Get a big bite of the main meal!!
This virtual thing is a giant leap in the right direction, don't get me wrong please. But if we see that we need more to make it, then how much more do we need to suffer and put our precious relationships at risk before taking the necessary painful steps?
For me, those steps were coming face2face with other addicts who saw right through all my BS and also exactly knew my pain, and came out the other side alive. I needed meetings, a sponsor, and an open, open, open fellowship with others like me to get better.
We are all afraid of a different life, until the one we have becomes totally unbearable, of course. It all depends on what you want: the same, or better?

Hey, you asked me.... ;D

Hey all,

I am feeling a little weak so I figured I'd post then walk around for a little bit. Hows everyone? Hope everyone has a great week!

-INH

I'm OK, thanks. Have a nice evening, reb INH.

Hey INH, what I wouldn't do to get a post like that from Dov on MY thread!! (but no, I won't fall for it  )

Remember, a fall will never ever help anything get better, only worse. Be strong! We're all here for you.

Hey Dov and Guard,

I heard something today in the DC group call that I cant rememmber but made so much sense. WAIT just remembered it! Were not trying to control the addiction were trying to.... forgot the punch line???? anyone know how the saying goes?? It was so great when I heard it. And were also trying to make it that we dont have a Taivah for lust just like we dont have a taivah to walk into Mcdonalds and eat a cheeseburger. Can someone help me out there????

-INH