Amazing, this is true growth and clarity!

I have found it that I am more relaxed, even when I have an urge, by the knowledge that I am a healthy human being that doesn't need to rely on Lust to get through my problems. This is including times of extreme stress and pressure!

Feeling worthy is also about self-respect. A lot of us have lost respect for ourselves, and if we change our self image from a person who doesn't deserve to be worthy, to a person who has earned that worthiness by working on themselves, then we are on the right path to happier lives.

(A side note, "happier lives" doesn't necessarily mean always happy, it could also mean that during the rough times this burden isn't there, which makes the rough times more manageable. As well as when life isn't rough then we are truly happy without this weight holding us back.)

Keep on Trucking, One Day At A Time!!

OK oilam truckin to 13 BeH! 
Spoke to mentor for a while tonight. Hes great BH really helping me.
Its ok to be hurt sometimes and not react with anger. Its OK to feel hungry sometimes and not run to eat something. Its OK to feel a need to relax and not turn to p&m even though I want to. Its OK to get triggered to feel bad and not react with the false pacifier of p&m.
Step 1 is recognizing that I am a good, great person with many positive qualities and not beat myself up every time something wrong happens. 
1 step at a time BeH.
Thank you to this special family for being there for me.
Until next time brothers.
Love,
WC

OOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I made it to day 26! Pretty good! Great actually! BH!
Then yesterday I fell, 2X. It started with a few glances at the wrong things...then when I couldn't fall asleep...it was tooo hard not to fantasize after laying awake in bed a few hours and then one thing led to another....then the next day fell again bec why not I fell already! Yeah I know wrong approach.
Either way BH today doing better. Day 1.
Actually the best thing eva happened through this fall. I reached out to my mentor and he told me he was disappointed in me. But he still loves me. That showed me that he has true expectations of me, its not all just fluff. There is someone who truly believes in my abilities to do better. And if I fall, he's going to be disappointed in me. Hopefully will make me think twice next time.
Heading on vacation next week, going to be a hard set up. Hopefully I will be able to post that I stayed clean the whole time!
Need to stay focused on my 1-motivation, 2-Triggers, 3-How to deal with my urges. Don't have them set up so well yet.  Also I think having a few people to call when the going gets rough would be good. More then 1 in case I cant get through to someone. Also I don't want to feel like I'm bothering someone when everyone has busy lives.
Until next time,
Love,
Wannachange

Shalom Brother,

26 days is huge! Glad you are appreciating that.

Sorry to hear about your falls but it's a great chizzuk to see you standing up and ready to get back to it. Yaasher Koach!

Have you written down your motivations? Might be a good idea to do that and review them daily.

I'd be happy to be one of your few people to reach out to, if you are interested (calling is harder for me, but I'm pretty available for messaging).
Let me know. My email is BenHashemBH@gmail.com and I can share my Google Voice number if that is easier.

When I was on vacation, I found it very helpful to have accountability, planning each day in the morning what I need to do, and assessing in the evening how it went and if improvements were needed. Stay on the ball

Hatzlacha and Koooooooooooool Tooooooooooooov!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hey Brother,

you're a true Hero!!