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Talking to parents
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TOPIC: Talking to parents 128 Views

Talking to parents 25 Mar 2025 20:17 #433441

Hey everyone!
before I ask my question I just want to express my thanx to HASHEM, gye, and the gye community for this incredible site. Every day I have my phone I check out the testimonies and story here and it gives me so much chizzuk! 

so my question is this: 
the only rebbi I’ve spoken to about my kedusha struggles is a very knowledgeable rebbi/physiologist. After I told him where I’m holding and my complete story (check out my story I think in my profile) he said that something that will be very helpful for me is to tell my parents everything. I agree with him. Bh they are incredible  and understanding people and I believe this will only strengthen our relationship. I think this will help considerably with my insecurity issues. 

so I just wanted to know if other people have done this and what feedback have they gotten. Thanks. Keep fightin!

Re: Talking to parents 25 Mar 2025 23:20 #433452

  • 1dayatatime1098
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Hey! I'm happy to hear you've opened up to someone about your struggle and are getting guidance. I did eventually tell my parents about my struggle (to an extent) when I was around 20. Our situation may be different so the results may also be different. I hadn't told a soul but my parents knew for years something was bothering me. I just refused to talk and kept everything thing to myself and it ate away at me. 

When I was around 20 I became extremely depressed, convinced I had ruined life for good and had zero hope and started having disturbing thoughts. Eventually my father asked once again what on earth is going on and I turned my brain off and told him. I think he was bracing to hear something worse (like abuse or the like). I remember being so freaked out but they took it well overall and were understanding. They were very upset at themselves for not properly filtering the family computer (which they then did). There were consequences as a result but I'll say that was for my situation and relationship with my parents not a general statement.

Bottom line it was a relief overall and helpful. They were supportive, got me to a therapist and it did help them understand me better etc....hope this helps.

Re: Talking to parents 26 Mar 2025 15:14 #433507

  • yitzchokm
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It depends very much on your relationship with your parents and your parents' personality. It isn't something that can be addressed on the forum. Your Rebbe should be able to give you the advice you need.

Re: Talking to parents 26 Mar 2025 21:13 #433543

  • adreamingyid
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Can't say yes/no as it depends on the situation which you your rebbe knows, but what I will say (from experience) is that if you are going to tell them, it can seem a lot scarier in your head than it actually is. If you and your rebbe think you should and you have that sort of relationship, it can be easy to chicken out. Push through that initial discomfort and it will bezh end up much better than before you told them
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