When my wife found out that I betrayed her by looking at inappropriate pictures online and chatting with other women, it was as if she was traumatized.  After all, she told me, "I didn't sign up for this, this is infidelity and just as bad as actual cheating. I answered back defensively, "well, at least it wasn't another real person, it was just porn."  That didn't go over very well 
Finally I realized that my betrayal, to any degree, has traumatized my wife and instead of being defensive I have to show empathy to her so she can heal and we can have a normal relationship again. 
As I thought more about it, I realized that this was a good way to think about consequences when I get triggered moving forward.  Is it worth a few minutes of looking or sexting when I know how deeply it hurts my wife?  How can I expect her to want to be intimate if I've just betrayed her?  I can't, not until she trusts me that I am working a program of recovery. 

Sounds like good motivation.

I'm afraid such motivation, while completely valid, might be short lived. Motivations are great because they might force you into coming up a good solution, but I don't know if the motivation itself is quite enough to help you overcome these behaviors. You should definitely find someone safe and trustworthy that you can be honest with about these matters.



Wishing you much Hatzlachah!

Thank you for the chizuk. Please keep posting.