sci1977 wrote on 08 Feb 2010 14:58:


That's a really great discovery!

Sci, I'm kicking myself for not visiting this thread sooner. I can't BELIEVE what I've bee missing!

I am speechless. Good thing I can still type, tho...

I have never in my life read such a uniquely sincere and personal account as you have so bravely shared with all of us. I am truly humbled by the depth of feeling and understanding, and style, with which you write.

Your introspection, your attitude, everything about you is so inspirational! Your Dear John letter, the TIME and courage it took to accomplish it... WOW.

I see I have been fooling myself thinking I know myself so well. You have shown me that it takes time and effort, and above all sincerity, to make a soul-searching inventory of oneself. And the amazing thing is that your perspective is so positive! THAT'S A DIRECTION OF GROWTH AND PURPOSE that most of us find hard to reach.

Yesterday, if I tried to define myself, so many points on my list would be the negatives - what i am NOT or who i wish i would become eventually. I would have defined myself by my shortcomings, because I tend to be hard on myself and see them first. (funny, cuz I'm always giving other GYE warriors advice to AVOID that and see only the positive in themselves - like we know, it's easier to tell someone else what to do than live by it oneself).

But today, after reading your posts, I can actually SEE how to start defining myself in only the positive light. Bli neder (without vowing) I'm gonna try to follow in these big footsteps of yours, and make the time to find out WHO I am. Get under the bumps on my skin and see the real pickle inside. I may not be as brave as you, to post it, but I think i need to do it too.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

Steve, my favorite pickle, thank you so much for stopping by and sharing here.  Thank you for the kind words and mostly thank you for your friendship.  We all need each other!!  I think people here might get tired of it, but think positive always.  It's not easy to be positive all the time.  But its worth the efforts. 

OK, OK, it's not the only reason i stayed up, but i was hoping i'd see this masterpiece of introspective discovery thingy posted already. Thought i heard somewhere that it might get findished tonite. But I guess all good things require second & third drafts. If so, fine, make mine a lager on the rocks.

Guess it's one of those times to play french, and go Ce La Vie!

"Lahveee."

Steve wrote on 10 Feb 2010 06:07:


Masterpiece didn't work out how I wanted last night.  Hopefully today it will be out, but I think it is going to be in the other thread as my update for today. 

ok so project sci1977 continues.  In a very heated business discussion today I realized that if you let the little things bother you, it is enevitable to fail on this journey.  I never once thought about slipping or falling but I am glad this happened today.  It made me go deep inside on how to deal with stress.  And I thought stress is something that everyone has, no matter what.  So what?  It's part of everything.  Thank you G-d for reminding me that today and not letting me get so stupid to yell either in the arguement.  One other note regarding stress, I looked at my life and now want to try and determine the factors in my life that cause me stress.  I think this will help me to go even further.

And project sci1977 is looking better and better each day!!

Incredible! You truly rock...and I love learning from you!

You're really deep, Sci!  I think it's a huge advantage!

Have a good Shabbos.

The road of life is really amazing sometimes.  I was talking to a co worker today and he made a comment about one of our customers.  He said the whole company was always looking to help others in business.  It didn't matter who they helped.  So my mind started thinking, forgetting the company part, am I like that.  Would I help anyone all the time.  I realized that when I had money I gave to charity.  Now that I don't have money anymore I should really look into other ways to help people.  Another thing that sci1977 needs to work on.  However, at first I was sort of upset that I wasn't so great with this.  But this too can be turned into a positive.  We are a work in progress.

Very true - and you clearly are looking for ideas of how to grow!

OK a new idea has been in my head now for a few days.  If you are selfless with G-d, do you need to be more selfless everywhere in your life.  And I have been having trouble with the idea of this.  But I think, more and more, it is true.  You have to be selfless everywhere.  It starts will being selfless with G-d and then moving on to the rest of my relationships.  I don't know if I see a change yet in myself, but I know I am trying to be more aware of not only focusing on what I want.  I must focus on the needs and wants of all that are around me. 

I think the two go hand in hand - the more we truly become selfless, whether with god or with others around us, we become more selfless and giving overall.

I think the two go hand in hand- sci and great posts!!!!!!!!

;D That, too!