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Not scared of Hashem
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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.
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TOPIC: Not scared of Hashem 120 Views

Not scared of Hashem 23 Apr 2021 01:13 #367308

  • eyes
  • Current streak: 614 days
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Hi Guys,
I have not been on for a while and will IYH not be on for another while.
I want to say something that I came to realize.
I came to realize that I am not scared of hashem. bc if i was i would be more careful. bh usually i am good, but sometimes not.

Re: Not scared of Hashem 23 Apr 2021 01:26 #367309

  • Sapy
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If you wouldn't be scared you wouldn't be careful at all.

Re: Not scared of Hashem 23 Apr 2021 01:27 #367310

  • HappyYid
  • Current streak: 94 days
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Sorry to hear.

But I honestly have a hard time believing that's really true.

I Quote from the GYE handbook:

- I would not be Mechalel Shabbos to view shmutz, no matter how bad I wanted it. I would be able to wait 24 hours.

- If the only way to get my fix in the coming 24 hours was by eating a Ham sandwich first, I probably would hold out and not do it for 24 hours.

- After I finish fully giving in to my desires, I don’t want to throw the rest of my Yiddishkeit away. I feel bad about it and I really do want to “come back” to Hashem. If I had a choice to push a “Stop These Aveiros Forever” button, I would press it.

Chances are all of the above is true, so clearly you are scared of Hashem in some way. Not entirely, because if so we wouldn't do many aveiros we do...

So just to say 'im not scared of Hashem' is really the wrong feeling. Maybe you're not so scared, maybe you feel your natural taivos are stronger than you could hold...but totally 'not scared'; that's a pretty big statement.

Wish you luck

Feel free to contact me
My thread

Re: Not scared of Hashem 23 Apr 2021 02:36 #367312

  • Lou
  • Current streak: 3 days
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R' Eyes,
From the little bit that I know about you I think that statement is not true in the simple sense of the words. However,possibly what you meant to say  is that you are not on the highest level of Yiras shamayim yet. As you said,if we truly feared Hashem we would not do any aveiros. However, this is something that applies to 90% of all Yidden for many Doros. If we all really feared Hashem on the highest level no one would speak Lashon Hara,make Brachos quickly,waste any time etc etc. . Even in the Gemara, a bracha was given that the talmidim should fear Hashem as much as they fear another person.Yiras shamayim is a life long avodah.You are certainly on the path just like all of us.

Re: Not scared of Hashem 23 Apr 2021 13:43 #367339

  • DavidT
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  • Posts: 795
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Rabbi Twerski wrote the following on this topic: 

Don't we have strong yiras shamayim?
B"H, we have wonderful yeshivos and seminaries. We have glatt kosher meat, chalavyisraelpasYisrael and kemachyashan. But listen to the Talmud. When Raban Yohanan ben Zakai was in his last days, his talmidim asked for his beracha. He said, "May your fear of Hashem be as great as your fear of people." His talmidim were shocked. "Is that what you think of us?" Raban Yohanan said, "Halevai you would achieve that! When a person does an aveira he is concerned that no person should see him. It does not bother him that Hashem sees him" (Berachos 25b).

Just think of it! The talmidim of Raban Yohanan ben Zakai! People whose greatness in Torah and kedusha is beyond what we can imagine, yet he felt that they might be lacking in yiras shamayim. How can we say about ourselves that we have adequate yiras shamayim? Remember what Chovas Halevavos says, "You may be asleep, but the yetzer hara is awake." Awake and unrelenting.

What can we do to increase yiras shamayim? Rashi provides the answer." To observe those mitzvos that we tend to trample on" (Devarim 7:12). B"H, we do not trample on kashrus,on Shabbos, or on chametz on Pesach, but unfortunately, we may trample on middos: kaas, lashon hara, kinah, sinah, ga'ava, shekker. We should keep before us the words of Rebbe Chaim Vital, that we should take even greater precaution with middos than we do with aveirosMiddos is the key to yiras shamayim.Middos gives the person a sense of kedusha and dignity that he would not allow himself to soiled with the tumah of the internet.

Let us be honest with ourselves. Do we sometimes lose our temper? The Talmud says that this is equivalent to avodah zara. Do we sometimes listen to or speak lashon hara, which is equivalent to the three cardinal sins of avodah zara, shefichas damim and ariyos? Do we sometimes deviate from the truth? No amount of chumros can be considered yiras shamayim if we are not meticulously careful about middos.

It is easy to buy kosher food. It is not easy to become master of our middos. It may be the most difficult challenge of our lives. But think of the person who will drive ten hours for fear that he may be exposed to the swine flu virus and how disastrous this can be to his grandchildren. If our homes do not become fortresses of true yiras shamayim, our children are at risk of being infected by the virus of the internet. Remember the words of Avraham Avinu "There is just no fear of G-d in this place." Without true yiras shamayim nothing else will work.

"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
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