Can I look at women (in order to give eye contact and communicate)   _________________  :

1. with whom I work with in the office?

2. at stores who I purchase products from?

3. at banks with clerks? 4. At hospitals with doctors?
5. Female friends of relatives.
If the answer is yes how often am I allowed to look in their eyes? Every time they speak with me or I I speak with them? Or must I close my eyes or look the other way when I speak to them like it says in this book "THE GUARDING OF THE BRIT AND THE GUARDING OF THE EYES"

Also what are the restrictions for my wife regarding whether she is permitted to look at men in the same situations as I asked about above: in the office with men she works with, in the stores with men she purchases products from, men who work at banks as clerks, and men who are doctors in hospitals?

Also am I allowed to greet women mentioned in the 4 questions I asked   above. Because I learned from studying torah that I am not allowed to greet women.  I personally go as far as not greeting women who are friend's of my female relatives. This is not alway easy because I don't want to be cold to women I don't know who know my relatives.  It is easier to great women who are friends of relatives who are men. 

Hi.

The general tone of your post doesn't sound good to me, but then I'm weird ...

I'm not your Rabbi, but I think you are allowed to look women in the eye as long as necessary to deal with the matter at hand. For most women this is a matter of respect. Maybe if you are at a kosher supermarket in Monsey they think it's better if you look at your shoes while you check out your groceries. I know one lady who does not look men in the eye. When we say hello she looks at some other part of my face. I am surrounded by super frum people and nobody does this.

If you look away when a woman is talking to you, eg your child's teacher, it makes a lot of women feel like they're just a source of desire. If you think about it you can see how there might even be a Torah violation there, depending on how she feels about it.

In fact, I purposely look women in the eye and focus on the merits of the conversation so I won't look at or think about other parts of their anatomy while I'm forced to interact with them (eg a meeting with my boss at work.)

Greeting women is a much easier problem. It depends on her philosophy. A frum Jewish woman usually does not greet men in the street and vice versa. But it's probably derech eretz to say "good morning" when you go buy a cup of coffee before you ask for your order. As I already stated, this actually puts you in the frame if mind that this thing in front of me might actually be a real human, not an incarnation of desire I can use to get turned on. So it helps you to act with derech eretz towards women that you are forced to deal with. If you have a choice, don't deal with them.

I don't it's assur to greet any woman if you think that's what she expects. I think the gemara says that you don't ask a woman how she's doing, but that's inquiry, not greeting. I think you can say "good morning." Just don't ask "how are you?"

I think women are allowed to look at whoever they want. I think that's left to women's sense of modesty. Thet usually know. And if they don't it usually doesn't help to point it out to them. It's like pushing a rope.

There may be cases where looking a woman in the eye is not permitted. I once looked a teacher in the eye and I was feeling terribly lonely and unloved by my wife, and we looked at each other and I could tell we had an emotional connection. I think she wanted to look at my eyes as derech eretz, and I looked at her eyes in a needy way. She hid behind a door as a result. She knew this was way too intimate. But it's pretty rare.

You really have to know yourself. But to know yourself you have to have a philosophy that allows you to see your own problems. That's a big topic ...

This is a halacha question (including the 5th chelek of Shulchan Aruch) and should be asked to a posek. If you dont have one, forward your question to the GYE administration and they will ask Rabbi Morgenstern or another one of their rabbonim.

I apologize for not welcoming you in the previous post. Welcome to the site. Have hatzlocha with whatever you have come here for.

I will qualify that I'm not a possek, but this is basic halacha. There is no issue of looking at any woman when talking to them in the normal way people do. There IS an issue in staring at a woman anytime in a lustful way (even at their hands). In general if you struggle with staring it women, it's better to look just above them - that way they see you as looking at them, but you can avoid the staring. 

In terms of greeting - it is not a problem saying hello to a woman. You may be confusing this with sending a greeting to a woman through a messenger. It is also an issue to call a woman her name directly (as in to her - not when just talking about her). 

If you get my drift, if you follow the precise halacha there is absolutely no awkwardness involved. 

Woman can call men by their names and I don't think sending greetings are an issue. Looking directly for them is also less of an issue. 

Please clarify all of that with your Rav.

as far as i understand, this is not a halacha furom, most people on here are allergic to the slightest kind of lust, and for me its a life or death situation if I'm gonna look or talk to women that will trigger my allergy I'm gonna end up relapsing and dying, if you feel you can do it then good for you thank god that your a healthy person, and no here cars on stuff that's between you and god. how ever if you are like me and you just wanna stop because of halacha then go out there and come back when ready  

The issue is that G-d created us with almost 180 degree vision. It's impossible to go outside and not see women (sometimes I pass a hundred when bringing my kids to school). So I think learning to manage it is something everyone needs to put work into. 

stronger- you're points are definitely very on the mark ( as usual) however i thing crying's point is that for him and alot of folks on here myself included (to a certain extent ) if we brought ourselves to a level where we lust after any woman we see sometimes for recovery may have to go that wat of totally avoiding even if may not be halachically necessary for a regular person as explained pretty well by MZL for many of us it may be PIKUACH NEFESH

Thank you. I can completely understand that, but is it something that is even feasible? When you walk in the street you can take your glasses off (which I sometimes do even if everyone is dressed tzniyusly), but if your driving you can't take them off. What are you supposed to do then?

stronger_today wrote on 19 Nov 2018 07:53:

You can't.

Fortunately the real problem is not looking but thinking. When you look at a pretty cashier giving you change at the store and you get turned on you are thinking something.

If you are someone who bh has the seichel to take off glasses in the street (or look past the people), you obviously are trying very hard to do the ratzon Hashem. When you daven in the morning and say the words "v'lo li'yedei nisayon", have in mind that Hashem should protect you from inappropriate sights as you drive.  Secondly, when there are two routes and one is more tzniusdik, choose that one - "ika darka achrina". May He grant you your request and protect you in the zchus of your doing your utnost on your end.