Thanks all. So my rav at the time didn't give a psak, he ran through the options and also pushed me to get to a sexual health clinic so we could speak to a professional. His opinion is that the coil is the best option. We haven't been yet as we hadn't made a firm decision on number 4.

My other kids are 5 year old twins and a 2 year old. They are bH great kids but often a handful. The older 2 bicker a lot and the 2 year old needs constant watching as he loves drawing on carpets and walls and body slamming off the furniture. I could certainly handle another, but right now I wouldn't enjoy another

my experience is that from all birth control methods, the coil without hormones is the one that has the least side effects (crazy hormonal wife) but it is uncomfortable to put in and remove.. and not something you would run to do for a few short month break.

This is not medication, it's birth control. You only find out what works for you once you try it. The only difference is in halacha, but sometimes a rabbi is machmir cuz he thinks that other options will work, but it may be a chumra d'usi lidai kulah. Vd"l. I didn't write in my post that you should hide anything for a rav. 
In my case I did my research and asked my rav about all the options, we had some problems in the beginning but BH we settled in the end.
I also helped a few friends with my experience & I'm very happy about it.
This was the last time I replied to this.

sonicReducer wrote on 22 Dec 2017 10:41:

BH you have healthy kids that are creating memories that you will love to recall in years from now. (You remember when Moishy scribbled on the wall & looked on us with his innocent face? Do we still have that picture? "...)

It's definitely not always easy but there is a great ROI (return on investment) on every child you will have. A car service driver once asked a friend of mine if it's not hard for us to raise 10 kids, he asked the driver how hard he'd work to get 5 million dollars & he told him that we work hard to raise kids because it's much more worth than money. (I'm not taking a side on whether or not you should think now of an other one, I'm just expressing my positive feeling towards kids...)