silentbattle wrote on 19 Sep 2010 14:01:
I need to remind myself that the happy things are what i need to focus on. They're what's real.
I try to avoid thinking about whether I am happy. It makes me too upset. :
![](https://guardyoureyes.com/components/com_kunena/template/default/images/emoticons/new/smile.png)
???
But I get your point and it
is appreciated. Thinking about being
happy makes much more sense than getting vexed about not being happy enough, and you do seem to be focusing on doing what is good and right. So I'm definitely with you there! You seem to trust that doing that will, eventually, make you happy....and I agree.
But I like to remember that my happiness isn't
only a state-of-being, which
is something I can work on - it is also a mood. And moods can be fickle, weird, and often(
I believe) uncontrollable. And I recently discovered that after a big loss, R"l, the feeling of sadness can come on quite unexpectedly. I need not trouble myself to uncover the trigger every time. Giving myself the space to feel sad once in a while is just part of being human, I guess. With time, it goes away, at least in my case.
Of course, if my general state-of-being/attitude
are screwed up, then I will have those 'moods' much more often....and that'd be a problem.