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The Workout Room!
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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.
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TOPIC: The Workout Room! 28831 Views

Re: The Workout Room! 20 Jan 2017 12:51 #303727

  • mayanhamisgaber
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Amen

B'hatzlacha
very important thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21" option="guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21">FEEL THE HUGS!!!

Re: The Workout Room! 22 Jan 2017 15:34 #303795

  • stillgoing
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Step 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of G-d.

We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection. Our description of the alcoholic (addict)... our personal adventure before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:

a. That we were alcoholics (addicts) and could not manage our own lives. (Is this you - yes-no?)

b. That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism (addiction). (Are you beyond human aid - yes-no?)

c. That God could and would if He were sought. (Are you willing to believe - yes-no?)

Being convinced (of a, b and c), we were at Step Three, which is that we decided to turn our will and our life over to G-d. Just what do we mean by that, and just what do we do?

The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success. (Are you convinced - yes-no?)
BIG SHOT!
Free Choice?!
Yirai's Memories
STORY TIME :)

Dr. Seuss - You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

FSKOT! (Fell Shmell--Keep on Trucking) (The Rebba R' Bards)

613stillgoing@gmail.com

Re: The Workout Room! 22 Jan 2017 15:43 #303797

  • stillgoing
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stillgoing wrote on 22 Jan 2017 15:34:




a. That we were alcoholics (addicts) and could not manage our own lives. (Is this you - yes-no?)




I wouldn't stress over whether we could or couldn't manage our own lives. To me, if one tried many times to stop, and tried somes 'tricks' that gye suggests, and still haven't stopped, then we can answer yes to the above question.  Maybe some 12steppers can chime in with their informed opinion (as opposed to my uninformed opinion :-) )
BIG SHOT!
Free Choice?!
Yirai's Memories
STORY TIME :)

Dr. Seuss - You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

FSKOT! (Fell Shmell--Keep on Trucking) (The Rebba R' Bards)

613stillgoing@gmail.com

Re: The Workout Room! 22 Jan 2017 16:59 #303805

  • cordnoy
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  1. Yes
  2. Yes
  3. Yes
  4. Yes
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: The Workout Room! 22 Jan 2017 21:49 #303852

  • thanks613
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stillgoing wrote on 22 Jan 2017 15:34:


Step 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of G-d.

b. That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism (addiction). (Are you beyond human aid - yes-no?)

c. That God could and would if He were sought. (Are you willing to believe - yes-no?)



I was recently talking with someone about how G-d intervenes when we "surrender our lust to Him".  In my experience, He doesn't simply make the lust evaporate, as in a sudden spiritual 'Eureka!'.  It was suggested that G-d intervened through the people that he makes available to help us, and maybe in some other ways too.  This idea makes sense to me at least.  From a religious standpoint, Hashem is very much involved in our lives, if we let Him in.  But He acts in hidden ways.  So is it beyond my power? Beyond the power of human help?  If I believe that my own efforts and the help of a therapist, Rabbi, friend, or whatever are purely human achievements, then who knows..  But I choose to recognize instead that Hashem gives success to my efforts, and that He guides the people and circumstances around me to provide support when I look to Him.

So is help "beyond human power"?  

Re: The Workout Room! 24 Jan 2017 16:07 #304118

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thanks613 wrote on 22 Jan 2017 21:49:

stillgoing wrote on 22 Jan 2017 15:34:


Step 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of G-d.

b. That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism (addiction). (Are you beyond human aid - yes-no?)

c. That God could and would if He were sought. (Are you willing to believe - yes-no?)



I was recently talking with someone about how G-d intervenes when we "surrender our lust to Him".  In my experience, He doesn't simply make the lust evaporate, as in a sudden spiritual 'Eureka!'.  It was suggested that G-d intervened through the people that he makes available to help us, and maybe in some other ways too.  This idea makes sense to me at least.  From a religious standpoint, Hashem is very much involved in our lives, if we let Him in.  But He acts in hidden ways.  So is it beyond my power? Beyond the power of human help?  If I believe that my own efforts and the help of a therapist, Rabbi, friend, or whatever are purely human achievements, then who knows..  But I choose to recognize instead that Hashem gives success to my efforts, and that He guides the people and circumstances around me to provide support when I look to Him.

So is help "beyond human power"?  


As a frum Jew, I agree that all human efforts are really from Hashem. However, when I turned to myself, "Rabbi, friend, or whatever" for help stopping, I got nowhere. The times that I actually managed to turn directly to Hashem and recognize that there is no one & nothing else in the world including the big strong uncle Will Power that can stop me, and that Hashem alone Can help me, then despite fairy tales being false there Was a poof. I actually felt the urge to act out drain away immediately. Of choice I could have ignored the help and continued to act out, but I no longer (for that moment) had the strong desire to. Without the urge/desire being present, my logic actually had a running chance of being heard. 99 out of 100 times in that circumstance my logic won, and this is with someone who without G-d directly will choose p##n 999 times out of 1000.

Do I believe in magic? No
Do I believe in G-d? Yes
BIG SHOT!
Free Choice?!
Yirai's Memories
STORY TIME :)

Dr. Seuss - You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

FSKOT! (Fell Shmell--Keep on Trucking) (The Rebba R' Bards)

613stillgoing@gmail.com

Re: The Workout Room! 24 Jan 2017 17:49 #304123

  • cordnoy
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Beyond.....Yes

Could.....yes

Would.....I don't know
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 05:43 #304178

  • thanks613
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cordnoy wrote on 24 Jan 2017 17:49:
Beyond.....Yes

Could.....yes

Would.....I don't know

I'm not sure what you mean?  You don't believe that G-d would?

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 18:41 #304231

  • cordnoy
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thanks613 wrote on 25 Jan 2017 05:43:

cordnoy wrote on 24 Jan 2017 17:49:
Beyond.....Yes

Could.....yes

Would.....I don't know

I'm not sure what you mean?  You don't believe that G-d would?

You know what God will/would do?

I don't.

Will He restore you to sanity?

What are the parameters?

So, in response to your question, I will repeat: I don't know.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 19:02 #304235

  • mayanhamisgaber
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though i'm not an addict still i rely on Hashem for many things.
do i know how he will help me with family tensions (which by the way are about to  blow sky high like think dropping an atom bomb on the house!!!!)
NO
do i know how he will give me parnassah
NO
the list can go on and on but ii can still say that he WILL help me and i may never see or understand how 
so what, i still know that he is my loving father who only wants and does what is best for me.

am i missing something or not understanding the question let me know thanks

B'hatzlacha
very important thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21" option="guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21">FEEL THE HUGS!!!

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 21:53 #304251

  • cordnoy
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And maybe what is best for you is not to have parnasah, or not to be sober, or not to be healthy, or to be missin' somethin'.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 22:00 #304253

  • mayanhamisgaber
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maybe so but one must try what one feels is right but know that Hashem knows best and acts on this


B'hatzlacha
very important thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21" option="guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21">FEEL THE HUGS!!!

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 22:05 #304254

  • cordnoy
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MayanHamisgaber wrote on 25 Jan 2017 22:00:
maybe so but one must try what one feels is right but know that Hashem knows best and acts on this


B'hatzlacha

Let us try to focus please on the issue at hand: we are discussin' if God 'would' make us sober or not. Are you addressin' that?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 22:14 #304255

  • mayanhamisgaber
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yes i am let me try to be clear 
if sober means not doing things that are assur then YES Hashem will make us sober we just have to do the right amount of hishtadlus what that amount is will be different for everone.
very important thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21" option="guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21">FEEL THE HUGS!!!

Re: The Workout Room! 25 Jan 2017 22:43 #304260

  • cordnoy
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MayanHamisgaber wrote on 25 Jan 2017 22:14:
yes i am let me try to be clear 
if sober means not doing things that are assur then YES Hashem will make us sober we just have to do the right amount of hishtadlus what that amount is will be different for everone.

My point exactly (besides the assur stuff, for that means nothin' to my recovery): since we have no idea what is required of us and we have no idea of any other factor, we will not know if God would/will make us sober; we do know that He could.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.
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