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Depression and addiction
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TOPIC: Depression and addiction 737 Views

Depression and addiction 08 Jan 2015 01:13 #246793

  • breakingthehabit
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  • עָזְרֵנִי אֵל חַי לְהַכְנִיעַ, אֶת יֵצֶר הַמְפַתֶּה הַמֵּרִיעַ.
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Hi Everyone, I've notice many here (including myself) have suffered from severe depression, do you think s@x addiction and depression are interlinked? should depression treatment accompany the chizuk of the GYE program? It seems that while you can protect yourself with the tools given Depression can be a trigger in the future to a fall down.

Personally before acting out on my urges I am depressed or angry and that also gives me a "heter" to look at shmutz and act out.


any thoughts?

Re: Depression and addiction 08 Jan 2015 04:31 #246800

  • Shmeichel
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no solution though from me yet
but i think it definitely can have a connection
however, be careful, because depression can be of two different types
where one needs medication, and nothing else will help, and the other needs a good psychotherapist, or a thorough learning of chovos halvovos etc...
but in the second case there is definitely a room for a healthy moral support against that killer called depression
thanks
when going forward gets tough, its merely a sign that you are going uphill, just give more gas
put your sobriety first; before your wife, before your kids, before your avodas HaTorah (except for the 3 that are יעבור ואל יהרג) Without sobriety you won't have any of those things!

Re: Depression and addiction 09 Jan 2015 19:56 #246895

  • cordnoy
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Not only are they connected; depression might be the cause of the addiction.

That is what the 12 steps are about. We need to find out what was/is wrong with us that we were lookin' for lust as a solution.

Your post hits it on the head why some addicted people are not recoverin'.
they are searchin' for chizuk in their addiction, and at the same time lookin' elsewhere to help them with their anger, resentment, loneliness, depression, stress, jealousy, and more.
It is only when they realize that one is fuelin' the other will they be on the path of recovery.

this is not for everyone, but for some.

b'hatzlachah
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Re: Depression and addiction 11 Jan 2015 02:53 #246920

  • doingtshuva
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breakingthehabit - Good ?
When ever I have an urge to look at Shmutz,
I stop and ask myself, am I now tiered, hungry, angry, stressed, depressed......?
At the same moment I try to remind myself that Smutz is not going to make the situation any better, just the opposite!!!!
I'll rather go on walk, eat, or make phone call.

From what I have read depression ,traumas or an abuse can lead to addiction, meaning that some addicts are not to blame for there addiction.

But who wants to stay suffering?
I would say that I work on both. Not to lust, and to have well being.
 *  NO, It's not all or nothing, just every bit counts!
 *  I failed yesterday, and I might fail tomorrow. But just for today I'm going to give it a try.
 *  Being curios made me lust and get into trouble.

אָמַר רבי יוחנן: אֵבֶר קָטָן יֵשׁ לוֹ לָאָדָם, מַרְעִיבוֹ = שָׂבֵעַ, מַשְׂבִּיעוֹ = רָעֵב

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Last Edit: 11 Jan 2015 02:55 by doingtshuva.

Re: Depression and addiction 11 Jan 2015 03:40 #246922

  • Shakeitoff
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The whole idea of stopping and asking myself "Am I...?" before looking for shmutz might be easier for me if I "put it off 2 minutes" every time I feel the urge. What I mean is...feel the urge, tell myself to put it off 2 minutes, then ask those excellent questions.

Might help me stop overeating too!

Re: Depression and addiction 11 Jan 2015 08:12 #246924

  • dms1234
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Shakeitoff
The whole idea of stopping and asking myself "Am I...?" before looking for shmutz might be easier for me if I "put it off 2 minutes" every time I feel the urge. What I mean is...feel the urge, tell myself to put it off 2 minutes, then ask those excellent questions.
I get what you mean but i don't know if i like to "put off" the urge. It just seems like i am avoiding recovery. I have to accept the urge! Meaning I realize its there and then realize like doingtshuva says that it won't benefit me. I often when i get an urge, take a deep breath which helps me concentrate. You could say i am putting off the urge but that lashon implies that it will come back immediately. Im not sure and I'm doing too much thinking. All i know is that WE GOTTA GET OUT OF OUR HEADS. Reaching out so key. Having someone that i can even message, preferably call, at any moment is a lifesaver.
I am happy to speak on the phone. Please email me at dms1234ongye@gmail.com

My name is Daniel, I go to face to face meetings and I work the 12 steps with a sponsor. 

Re: Depression and addiction 11 Jan 2015 08:59 #246929

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I couldn't agree more that reaching out to someone else is the best thing. Best of luck in your learning in Eretz Yisrael!

Re: Depression and addiction 15 Jan 2015 19:25 #247240

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  • עָזְרֵנִי אֵל חַי לְהַכְנִיעַ, אֶת יֵצֶר הַמְפַתֶּה הַמֵּרִיעַ.
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Thank you all for your responses. I just have been thinking a lot about the subject. And because of it I've tried to work on my depression with a therapist besides the 12 steps. I think depression which conducts to low self esteem can become a matir for acting on your urges.

Re: Depression and addiction 15 Jan 2015 19:51 #247241

  • cordnoy
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Ain't that the truth!

I wouldn't say it as a matir; more like a relaease, a lettin' go, a removal from reality, a place of escape.

And that is why we call this addiction as a solution; not the problem.

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1Page 2Page 3Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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