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TOPIC: Tryin' 266105 Views

Re: tryin 31 Jul 2013 23:47 #214369

  • cordnoy
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so He is with me, for He is everywhere?
He is with me, for I can talk to Him?
Heis with me in the addiction, for He cares about me?

sorry that im a bit slow, and definitely not as connected as you are.
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Re: tryin 01 Aug 2013 01:28 #214399

  • MendelZ
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cordnoy wrote:
so He is with me, for He is everywhere?
He is with me, for I can talk to Him?
He is with me in the addiction, for He cares about me?

sorry that im a bit slow, and definitely not as connected as you are.


Yes. The One Above is all of the above.

"With me" sounds like He bichvodo u'vatzmo was there in a spacial sense in the bathroom when I last wanted to feel good. Or, with you in parking lot number 4. (I doubt this is the forum for discussing tzimtzum and the various ways of understanding מלא כל הארץ כבודו - maybe in the GYE Beis Medrash there's a thread on it already?)

Instead, let's say Hashem is available to me at all times. I am constantly in a relationship with Him, whether I feel "connected" or not. (Don't give that word too much meaning. You are always connected to Him.) He is always there to draw strength from, to enlist into your fight. He expects us to conscript Him into battle, so to speak. He is much more than that, obviously, but at the very least I need to see Him as the One I can speak to and call on at every moment of my life.

In the context of "where was He then?", I would say G-d helps those who help themselves. If we help ourselves by calling on Him, He will help. Not always in the most apparent way, but He will answer us somehow.

It seems to me that if He wasn't with me, then where could He have been?
If He isn't with me now, where then is He?

Letting him in, as the Kotzker said, is like being powerless, no?
אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר
That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.

Re: tryin 01 Aug 2013 04:31 #214421

  • cordnoy
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thank you

I know I am powerless without Him
I know He is everywhere
My innerself is always interested in what He wants
I just don't hear Him tellin me to stay clean
Perhaps He is and my ears are stuffed

Either way, onward is the name of the game
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
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Re: tryin 04 Aug 2013 12:27 #214888

  • cordnoy
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been davening better the last several days

shiva shavuos gotta count for something!!!!
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Last Edit: 18 Feb 2016 23:39 by cordnoy.

Re: tryin 04 Aug 2013 13:41 #214894

  • Watson
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cordnoy wrote:
been davening better the last several days

shiva shavuos gotta count for something!!!!




Amazing!!!

Kol hakovod!
Last Edit: 18 Feb 2016 23:39 by cordnoy.

Re: tryin 04 Aug 2013 20:08 #214922

  • cordnoy
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doc,
your posts and others give me tremendous chizuk
for some reason, my struggle now is not as tough as it was before, and not as fierce as you and some of the others are relating.
I don't know what remedies are

I do know that telling therapist (two of 'em) all, and I mean all....must help for something

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Re: tryin 05 Aug 2013 00:07 #214950

  • MendelZ
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for some reason, my struggle now is not as tough as it was before, and not as fierce as you and some of the others are relating.


BARUCH HASHEM!!! Thrilled to hear that. As obvious as this is, i find it helpful to always remember not to become complacent. Some ppl never have an issue with that; they are so scared stiff that they always know how close they are to sliding back into old patterns. But, for me, when I find myself not struggling so much, I make a big point, bs"d, of refocusing on humility and gratitude that things have gotten easier. Its a huge beracha that we must never forget to be thankful for.

I know this isn't a chidush to you. Just saying what helps for me.

KTTR (Keep that tank rolling) and KOKO (Keep on keepin' on)!!!
אלא יש לו לייחד כל מעשיו לשמו הגדול לבד, ולא ישתף עמו דבר אחר
That's the goal. The key to everything. Working on it, bs"d.

Re: tryin 05 Aug 2013 00:29 #214955

  • cordnoy
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thank you mendel

how well I know

my two issues are forefront in my brain

issue with wife, I must tread carefully at every moment and turn
she is under tons of stress, and I cannot afford to make a wrong move (for her sake, not for mine).

Tayvos...I cannot afford to let that happen...stakes are too high...life is too precious....I have not been in control of my life ..... ever! I cannot leave go of the reins!

thank you, and please....keep remindin me

b'hatzlachah

Avrom
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

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Last Edit: 01 Jan 2014 02:23 by cordnoy.

Re: tryin 08 Aug 2013 17:27 #215428

  • cordnoy
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status.... goin' strong
no problems at all b"H

keep on tankin along
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Last Edit: 18 Feb 2016 23:40 by cordnoy.

Re: tryin 12 Aug 2013 06:48 #215773

  • cordnoy
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remember that quote (possibly from zemiros, or Hashem's soldier):

[b] YOU'RE ONLY AS CLEAN AS YOUR WEAKEST DAY [b]

(or something like that).

Gotta always be on guard!
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Last Edit: 12 Aug 2013 06:49 by cordnoy.

Re: tryin 20 Aug 2013 19:19 #216641

  • cordnoy
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life's good!

had a slightly stressed morning
mentioned to a chaver here that in da past, I would revert to other stuff
had somewhat of a desire to do that again today
didn't
I wish I would know why I didn't
cant put my finger on it

main thing is that I didn't, but it sure would help (me and others perhaps) if I knew why.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Last Edit: 18 Feb 2016 23:41 by cordnoy.

Re: tryin 20 Aug 2013 19:53 #216647

  • skeptical
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Perhaps it's because you have a different, more mature attitude now.

Keep growing!

Re: tryin 20 Aug 2013 20:06 #216649

  • cordnoy
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you might be right
just cant pinpoint the steps

thank you

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
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https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Re: tryin 20 Aug 2013 20:15 #216652

  • tryingtoshteig
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sixties.jpg
"ויעזור ויגן ויושיע לכל החוסים בו ונאמר אמן" -- ArtScroll Gabbai's Handbook

Re: tryin 20 Aug 2013 20:20 #216654

  • cordnoy
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why da "60's"?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
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https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.
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