I hope you are going to celebrate.

yas dov 12 steps i just let go of letting go for a bit!

RT wrote on 10 Oct 2012 07:31:

MAZEL TOV!!!!!

tocontrolmyself wrote on 10 Oct 2012 16:32:

Great! And when you say 12 steps do you mean u r working them alone - or with another sober addict like a sponsor or mentor or something?

i went through a cycle of steves call

Went? So what tools do you have now? That's the point of his calls, i'd imagine. To give you tools, no?

Maybe staying in the repeated cycles is the way to go, or joining another call, or going veiter in some practical way on the derech of his calls...there are a lot of ways to do that. What do you think, chaver?

im thinking of joining dovid chaims call but im going to israel and the cell phone plan isnt very suited to such long calls so consistently....tried getting s.taubs book but itll take to long to get to where i live ill be gone by then but i saw on chabad.org he has in depth articles ojn recovery so ill reread the big book and try to make a habit of reading some of his stuff...thanks for your support..actually had a very dirty fall last night but b.h i got up straight away w/o any negative attention...all the best!

Sorry you had that trouble last night, but it's great you can share that here!

Please take this as it is meant - just a suggestion to help u reach your goals:

Merely admitting you had "a very dirty fall" is not nearly enough to help, chaver. You (we) need a game changer, don't we. Unless we want to keep playing the same exact game...and that is exactly whay you asked how to get out of. So: Believe it or not, admitting things like that in such generalities - and only on a virtual forum - and hiding behind a fake username, too boot...these things will not yield you the treasure and serenity that you are plotzing for.

Do you hear me and is there any way for you to find safe people to open up to in a way that will really help you get rid of your secrets? Wise people have said, "We are as sick as our secrets." I know that to be true for me and for many others I meet.

Hatzlocha moving along and not just staying comfy! You are not alone!

i have a rebbi in yeshiva im perfecylt honest and open and he knoes everything but we both know that he doesnt know the 12 steps to help me but im open its not a dark deep secret.i also talk on the phone with guys from the gye phone conference group but its gonna be hard to maintain...

RT wrote on 10 Oct 2012 07:31:


Mazal Tov RT!! I am so happy for you. Keep up the inspirational work

maybe be call the american number from a computer using skype or google-voice.

hatzlocho rabbo!

bye im off to israel bh all the best i dont think ill have access.ive just got back on track namely i worked on and started feeling more g-d conscious.bye see you guys with clean eyes!!!!

97 days
all this days clean machshovo (from hirhure niuf and znus)

hope ya'll are well

how much days do YOU guys have??


p.s. hmm. if i'll make this year muvtach ani sheani ben haolam habo... if u know what i mean

I know what you mean , RT.... may Hahsem help you become stronger every day!!!

Kevin - always with you!

A gitten Tog raboysay.

Today was THE day. After being sober for 102 days, the yetzer hora came again -.-

I didnt fall. h"v
I did not come to kishui h"v
I didnt even have so much hirhurim. at least yet. adraba, baruch haShem I was even matzliach to fight them.

BUT

he came back -.-

I had this feeling, which you all are probably familiar with. If you learn. dont think about bad things. but you feel that es kocht sach inside. you're burning. grrr.

Afraid stikkle about tomorrow.

well. be well.

Kevin, why dont you send me a letter ?