Today was my second fall since getting involved with GYE.  Last time I picked myself up and just started over, but I'm not sure what to think about today.  I'm traveling abroad in China right now, and it's been a pretty stressful trip.  I had been fine the whole day, no problems.  But, on the bus heading to my hotel I started to feel sick (I've officially got a cold now), and got stuck in traffic for over 2 hours.  I came home hungry, tired, sick, and really annoyed, and next thing I knew ––

what makes me so upset about this, is that it happened before i even knew what was going on.  None of the stuff I'd been reading here came to mind, not even the TaPHSic shvuah I made (so now I get fast while traveling and with a cold tomorrow).  only after it was over did i come to my senses and realize what had been going on.  how is it possible that, even though this subject has been on the front of my mind since i got here, that in one instant i forgot everything?  how do i prevent this in the future? 

thanks & best,
yoni 

because you're in China, and it's filled with sick people.  (Not to be racist or anything).  But it's really a foreign society for a Jew, and it's like the most dangerous spiritual place for a person in early recovery.  If you can't avoid going there due to work reason, then you need to set up a massive plan of refuge - i.e. find a group, find a minyan, etc.  Without making a plan in advance, you might as well consider yourself as setting up the fall.  Was there no way to avoid this trip???  After seeing the video of that poor young girl die in the street in China, I have to say, I want nothing to do with that contract and the evil it breeds. 

start over

ki karov elecha hadavar me-od!!!

great question.I do not know the answer to it I can just share what is my experience and that is that every time I had a sudden fall like that I learnt something new about myself and my addiction.So it might be that you now are more aware that being tired and hungry and stress is a very vunurable state to be in.

start on a new truck

it will say
"made in china"

ill pick it up in walmart

Hi Yoni,

Stay strong and keep on trucking!!

The problem is that the trucks in China look like this one, but it only has to last you another 6 weeks, then you can come home and get a real one  ;D ;D .

Gevura!

ive experienced the same thing.  Its hard and I dont think it has anything to do with your location.  I have the same thing happened to me wherever.  Just go into risky situations, whatever that means for you, with a promise that you wont do it.  if not a promise a reminder.  bhatzlacha!