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TOPIC: HELLO 2638 Views

Re: HELLO 18 May 2012 22:58 #137806

  • emunah19
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I never call, ever when Im close to falling I just cant i dont know why its nuts but i hope i dont fall im scared of falling i dont know what it will be like again im scared What am i going to tell myself when I fall I cant face myself I just hope that guys on the forum can keep me uplifted.I am so dejected lately I dont know why My Rebbeim told me I should do things that i enjoy in yiddishkeit I dont even know what i enjoy actually thats not true i know a few things but its hard to bring myself to do them.

I think that I am an attention seeker i love learning in a spot where everyone can see me.I love telling people my accomplishments I feel like all this "showing off is getting to me and somehow driving me crazy I dont know if this makes sense or if I'm overdoing it a bit (which I tend to do) but in any case I feel wrong inside empty devoid of anything holy I used to feel much more connected I dont know whats wrong with me I hope Hashem guides me in the right direction In the meantime i tried joking with my mother about a cuzin of mine who is very pretty and here for Shabbos "maybe I should marry her" She didnt like it anyway this cuzin is here for Shabbos and i keep on getting thoughts of us doing something together And i get unrelenting thoughts about my cleaning lady who is not so pretty and my grandmothers cleaning lady who is like 50 and i just have this scene in my head that doesnt seem to go away anyway about this week I hope I get strength not to fall and masturbate because I want to so badly And Im scared im going to approach my cuzin and say or do something stupid I just am scared. I WANT EVERYTHING TO END I am so frustrated i want to hit something now i dont know why

Good shabbos hopefully i have a good shabbos

Re: HELLO 19 May 2012 02:26 #137808

  • obormottel
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Daven for willingness to stay clean.
Gut shabbos.
Baby steps.
If the road is pulling you down, it's a sign that you are going uphill, so just press harder on the gas!

Have a great day - unless, of course, you made other plans.

Re: HELLO 20 May 2012 05:19 #137813

  • Eye.nonymous
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Call regularly. Build up a relationship.

If you just wait until you're about to fall to call a total stranger and say, "I'm about to m*sturbate," it's really hard to do. But, if it's someone you speak to regularly, it's not so hard.

It has happened to me a few times that, those people that I speak to regularly, have called me precisely at those times when I really should have called them but wasn't feeling like I could.

--Elyah

Re: HELLO 21 May 2012 17:02 #137911

  • TehillimZugger
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How was the shabbos with Miss Pretty?
?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: HELLO 21 May 2012 17:27 #137915

  • ZemirosShabbos
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Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
~Cordnoy

The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ

Re: HELLO 01 Jun 2012 21:34 #138684

  • emunah19
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Shabbos was great It didnt bother me that much

good shabbos guys and thanks
BTW How was your' Shevuos

Re: HELLO 01 Jun 2012 21:45 #138685

  • emunah19
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Okay Zemiros the truth is i called mishmeres hatznius ;D ;D ;D

Re: HELLO 04 Jun 2012 09:55 #138783

  • TehillimZugger
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Zemmy was helpful, wasn't he?
?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: HELLO 08 Jun 2012 20:48 #139141

  • emunah19
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Zemmy? You Just made that up on the spot?

Anyway ya he was. And so are you. So let us sing and dance and have fun .I am just Hyper btw so disregard anything i say except for this GOOD SHABBOS!!!!!!!!!

Re: HELLO 21 Sep 2012 21:44 #145164

  • emunah19
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Hi guys long time no speak B H im doing fine i hope everyone else is also doing fine
Good Shabbos

Re: HELLO 21 Sep 2012 22:07 #145165

  • gevura shebyesod
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Hi there, welcome back! B"H trucking along.

Have a great Shabbos!

Gevura!
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: HELLO 09 Oct 2012 21:38 #145692

  • Eye.nonymous
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emunah18 wrote on 21 Sep 2012 21:44:

Good Shabbos


Gezunteh Vinter

--Elyah

Re: HELLO 26 Oct 2012 18:57 #146810

  • emunah19
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miss you guys i hope everyone is doing fine have a wonderful Shabbos

Re: HELLO 26 Oct 2012 19:23 #146816

  • reallygettingthere
@emunah18

Just read your thread. wow you are mamash amazing.

KOMT

Good Shabbos

Eli

Re: HELLO 26 Oct 2012 20:12 #146819

  • emunah19
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thank you ;D that is nice, now i have to see your thread :D :D
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