Amazing Yedid! Keep on sharing your struggles it gives chizuk to us all, and it's always good to share.

Finally with much Siyata dishemaya I have reached the 1 week mark. This is unexplored territory for me. It really feels great but at the same time I'm scared. Today hasn't been so good though. It started this morning when I saw one of the teachers who I am attracted to and then for the rest of the day I was lusting. Bchasdei Hashem I was strengthened at Mincha and learning. I really anticipate now each clean day.

Last night I was tired and it was late and really wanted to go to sleep but Iv been trying to learn every night. There I was lying on my bed ready to just give in to the urge to sleep. Then I remembered the countless times that I have stayed up into the hours of the morning watching shmutz and falling. Surely if I had koach all those times I have the potential to stay up this time. And it worked I managed to learn a good 45 minute. Thanks you yetzer hora if there's one lesson iv learnt from my struggles it's this lesson that the strength is within us to stay up the whole night.

Thanks and Tizkeh Lmitzvot

Sorry I know that this is random and has nothing to do with this forum but I feel that it is important to speak my mnd somewhere

Hevra!!!

This Friday with the whole Palestinian bid for statehood or whatever,the USA have said they will veto it which is obviously a good thing.

please people do not forget for even on moment that it's not Obama it's the RIBONO SHEL OLAM who is being mashgiach on this it's all in his hands we have to know this and it's so important.

sorry for this irrelevant rant but I had to say it somewhere

yedid_nefesh wrote on 22 Sep 2011 17:46:


Excellent stuff!  We have all heard that it is possible, after teshuva, that our aveiros can be turned into mitzvos.  It seems to me you've done just that!

Shteig on!

Amazing Yedid! And 'sticking in' a reference to emunah is always relevant, in whatever context, on this forum.

Ok I'm really sorry to Hashem to myself and the holy people of this forum for letting you down. I fell On Friday and yesterday afternoon and it's really rare for me to fall on Shabbos. On the bright side however I made it to a week - something I haven't done in ages and on top of that last week I fought some of the hardest and best battles iv ever encountered so it's not that deprressing. Even though I fell fridY afternoon that morning I managed to control myself in an almost impossible situation coming out strong. The potential is there to do it again we just got to give it our all. Tizkeh lmitzvot.

Yedid,
You're doing fine and will ultimately triumph.
Try as much as possible to avoid "impossible situations."
Truck on!
Alex

Ki Sheva Yipol Tzaddik Vekum


just saw that by someones name

do u know who??

The fighting is just beggining.....keep on battling.....

Ok last night I was mamish planning on falling, surfacing on an iPad getting the best content. The I had to do a few things and by the time I was done the Internet wasn't working, so I kind of gave up the plan to fall( I was actually disappointed) For some reason Hashem did not want me to fall, but I'm admitting here that it was my intention to fall. 

Today was very mixed there were times where I would let my eyes wonder then I would decide not to and on and on. But towards the end of the day I decided to be strong till mincha and BH I managed. It's really interesting because I was in a place where no nice woman would have been and then all of a sudden this one woman decides to walk her dogs there and she was dressed in a way that I find attractive. I was standing behind a fence and her dog started gong crazy at me looking viscous and all but I stood there and just stared at it realizing that the harm from this dog is nothing compared to looking. Nothing and lusting is death. It really is, anyway it's was a shtickel chizuk. I'm kind of getting used to that nagging call from the yetzer to fall. Anyways thanks for listening to my ramblings.chalk vematz
Tizkeh lmitzvot

The trick is to turn to Hashem with tefila as soon as your radar detects the temptation.  We call this turning the battle over to Hashem.  Have you looked over the 12 steps?

No I haven't looked at The 12 steps but i will bli neder during my upcoming ing holiday. It hasn't been such a great day but I think things are fine for now. Day 4, beezrat Hashem I can enter the new year with some clean days behind me.thanks.tizkeh lmitzvot

That is beautiful to enter the new year clean....I didnt think of it like that..thank you

GMAR chatima tova to all
See you next year

Well we won't 'see you', actually maybe we will....this might be the real 'seeing'......deep stuff......