I fell.  Plain and simple.  I did not put up enough safeguards and the yetzer horo knew it.  I actually at first did not want to post but I told myself that if I was going to serious about being stringent with my Shmiras Anayim, than I was going to have to post. Did I let myself down? Yes. Am I a bit embarrassed? Yes. Do I feel like I cannot start again? No.  I kept 17 days clean and I have not felt this good in months.  I know that I fell, but picking yourself up is the hardest part of the battle.  I am forcing myself to post right now and it seems like there is a bigger yetzer hora telling me not to post than the yetzer horo that spoke to me last night before I fell.  Maybe falling is bad, but it is not the end of the world. Falling and not being strong enough to pick yourself back up, that is the end of the world.

My last streak was 17, starting today, I am going for 90 again!

What Reselience so nice to read your post.Hatzlochah Rabbah.

Pure dove, its part of the game man. If you wanna succeed, u gatta be open to fail. And theres no way you'll fail in the long run if ur tryin sp hard. And about your fear of postin stuff on this forum, i also had it, and the reason ur having the fear, is probably because you feel that if you post stuff on forum, then ull loose your desires and passions. But truth is, its up to u in the end and only u can succeed. Go ahaed, and keep on truckin

Honesty is one of the main ingredients to recovery.

The safeguards need to be in our brain, and until we can do that nothing really helps long-term.

--Elyah

awesome attitude! with the right attitude you'll go all the way!

PureDove,
The Y"H has endless patience.  He never quits  We can actually learn a great deal from him.  The key to success is early and frequent blocking of his advances.  And strict shmiras eynayim at all times.

Your honesty is appreciated here.  It will pay big dividends.
You will do this!
Alex