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90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less
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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.

TOPIC: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 66759 Views

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 28 Mar 2016 12:00 #282731

  • shlomoy
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"Dov" post=282362 date=1458767420Well that's saying something.

Continued hatzlocha with whatever you are doing that helps, man.

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 28 Mar 2016 12:13 #282733

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How are we doing Shlomoy ?  
I pm'ed you but all got erased .
How have you been lately ?

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 14 Jun 2016 17:43 #290059

  • gibbor120
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Yesodi wrote on 15 Feb 2016 23:28:
A selfish reason: the awesome feeling of being in control, vs. terrible sadness of being enslaved by the Dark Side.

You mean "The awesome feeling of knowing that Hashem is in control and taking care of everthing vs. the terrible sadness of the illusion that I am in control while instead being enslaved by the dark side" ?

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 18 Jun 2016 23:01 #290299

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gibbor120 wrote on 14 Jun 2016 17:43:

Yesodi wrote on 15 Feb 2016 23:28:
A selfish reason: the awesome feeling of being in control, vs. terrible sadness of being enslaved by the Dark Side.

You mean "The awesome feeling of knowing that Hashem is in control and taking care of everthing vs. the terrible sadness of the illusion that I am in control while instead being enslaved by the dark side" ?

Although I understand and also accept the general direction of your "correction," my bottom-line answer to you is: No. I pretty much mean what I originally wrote.

As our sages teach us: "הכל בידי שמים – חוץ מיראת שמים" ("Everything is in the hands of heaven except for the fear of heaven"). The illusion of control applies to 99.9% of the (mundane) "decisions" that we think we are making for ourselves, mistakenly thinking that these too are part of the tremendous gift of "free will" that we have been given.

But in true, moral, decisions such as these -- between Good and Evil, and between "acting out" and NOT "acting out" -- the free choice, and thus also the sense of "control," is (as much as can be said) ... "real."
I invite you to follow:

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 19 Jun 2016 03:22 #290302

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Yesodi wrote on 25 Aug 1974 02:18:
As our sages teach us: "הכל בידי שמים – חוץ מיראת שמים" ("Everything is in the hands of heaven except for the fear of heaven"). The illusion of control applies to 99.9% of the (mundane) "decisions" that we think we are making for ourselves, mistakenly thinking that these too are part of the tremendous gift of "free will" that we have been given.

But in true, moral, decisions such as these -- between Good and Evil, and between "acting out" and NOT "acting out" -- the free choice, and thus also the sense of "control," is (as much as can be said) ... "real."

 

I believe that what it means that we have the power of choice in terms of yirah shamaim in the context of our addiction means - that we come to the logical and MORAL conclusion that life is unmanageable and need  help desperately. This decision to seek and accept that help can be a case of proper yirah shamaim.
However, in terms of beating our compulsions as they arise in our daily life? We are in this mess because we are powerless. Surely, here and there there may be struggles we can whiteknuckle through but eventually we will fail, right?
We are willing to accept Hashem's sovereignty and dominion. We know he and he alone is truly in charge. This humble acceptance can also be called yira shamaim. In short following the true and trusted program is yira shamaim. However, that we have the power to win each war as it arises is clearly false; proven by  our life experience.
Not only is such an attitude wrong but it is arrogant although our yetzer harah has succeeded in fooling us for years into believing that it is indeed pious to believe so.
It is this attitude that delays us from receiving the assistance that truly works.
 

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 14 Jun 2017 01:16 #315230

  • cordnoy
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cordnoy wrote on 28 Apr 2014 06:14:

R76 wrote:

cordnoy wrote:
i did not come here because of the sin
i did not stop (for now) because of the sin
i did not become mean during my acting out
i was not depressed
it was enjoyable
the build-up was heaven
lustin' was excitin'


Definitely -- that is why it is so hard to give up. I have been clean almost seven months but I miss that time more and more. I have many different issues to deal with.


i remember visitin' hell twice....it is not a place i wanna return to right now.

even if I can't find heaven, I won't walk thru Hell with you.......
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 14 Jun 2017 18:04 #315286

But I'll walk OUT with you
my thread:guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/300426-I-will-make-it-bh" option="guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/300426-I-will-make-it-bh">I will make it b"h











very important thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21" option="guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/19180-FEEL-THE-HUGS%21%21%21">FEEL THE HUGS!!!

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 17 Oct 2017 16:22 #321205

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When i'm in a lust bubble 90,000 reasons are not enough to stop me, nowhere near. The only thing which can stop me is God which is why i need to get on my knees every morning BEFORE the lust attack and ask Hashem for help.
Formerly mikestruggling I just bought a truck. l hang out in the trailer and G-d drives. 
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 18 Oct 2017 09:22 #321259

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hashem gave us this special nisoyon and we can give our father in heaven the biggest prize hold back like avrohom ovinu with his nisoyonos

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 20 Oct 2017 13:37 #321359

  • yiraishamaim
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The reasons don't directly help an addict stop. However, it is for these very reasons that he/she seeks out an effective program that will indeed help that individual begin to live properly.

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 21 Oct 2017 19:37 #321384

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i fully agree with you
thanx for correcting me

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 07 Mar 2018 03:02 #327860

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If i act out ill get into שאלות over my TAPHSIC shvua. Dont get into שאלות rabosai.

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 07 Mar 2018 21:31 #327896

Acting out! acting out! acting out!
Remember this urge that is inside us that push'es us do it! do it!
This is the Yitzer Hora,
So you think to yourself you know what we'l give in now, and leave me alone Yitzer Hora,
Looks like A familyer deal, Right?
Now one's you gave in to him instead of saying Thanks,
He is back again OMG what do you want from me now I already gave you what you asked for?
No No No! that was only the beginning of my plan Shafele, Now comes the real work for me, Now I will use your fall to DESTROY YOU!!!! 
So basically how he works is, The few hours before the fall he is taking over your whole body, makes you do crazy stuff push all the limits to the max [Bt'w if you anytime want to know what you are capable of and what your limits really are try to remember that when there is A will there is A way:}] so you cannot focus on life, kids, marriage, business, and everything that is important to you, Only on the urge.
And then there is the fall, And then after the fall you feel like such A noting that you have no appetite to focus on life, kids, marriage, business, and everything that is important to you, 
So it was so-posed to be A good Shaabas, A good Yom Tov,  A good Simcha, or just another good productive day at work or in your life and here it is all destrrrrrrrrrrroyed!
So, lets take all are kochos together and tell him NO! NO! and one's again NO! 
​I will try again and again and again, I will push the limits, I will try every trick, support, and help that hashem gave me and use them to the best of my ability, 
I will live my life like A yid, and enjoy it like A yid
And with hashems help I will live A good productive clean life!
Last Edit: 07 Mar 2018 21:39 by shevayipoltzadik.

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 16 Mar 2018 04:20 #328418

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This is my first post on any forum on GYE.

Think to yourself: Acting out is beneath my dignity. I may have done this in the past, but this is not what I do  anymore. I am more important than that. I am beyond this. 

Re: 90,000 Reasons To Say NO to acting out.... in 20 words or less 07 Jun 2018 03:35 #331835

  • cordnoy
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shevayipoltzadik wrote on 07 Mar 2018 21:31:
Acting out! acting out! acting out!
Remember this urge that is inside us that push'es us do it! do it!
This is the Yitzer Hora,
So you think to yourself you know what we'l give in now, and leave me alone Yitzer Hora,
Looks like A familyer deal, Right?
Now one's you gave in to him instead of saying Thanks,
He is back again OMG what do you want from me now I already gave you what you asked for?
No No No! that was only the beginning of my plan Shafele, Now comes the real work for me, Now I will use your fall to DESTROY YOU!!!! 
So basically how he works is, The few hours before the fall he is taking over your whole body, makes you do crazy stuff push all the limits to the max [Bt'w if you anytime want to know what you are capable of and what your limits really are try to remember that when there is A will there is A way:}] so you cannot focus on life, kids, marriage, business, and everything that is important to you, Only on the urge.
And then there is the fall, And then after the fall you feel like such A noting that you have no appetite to focus on life, kids, marriage, business, and everything that is important to you, 
So it was so-posed to be A good Shaabas, A good Yom Tov,  A good Simcha, or just another good productive day at work or in your life and here it is all destrrrrrrrrrrroyed!
So, lets take all are kochos together and tell him NO! NO! and one's again NO! 
​I will try again and again and again, I will push the limits, I will try every trick, support, and help that hashem gave me and use them to the best of my ability, 
I will live my life like A yid, and enjoy it like A yid
And with hashems help I will live A good productive clean life!

So I can't count; you can't have everythin'.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.
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