Hey Everyone, 
Just wanted to provide some encouragement on here. Keep doing your best. Try not to lie to yourself and rationalize anytime you fall, no matter how big or small of a fall it may be. As long as we are being honest with ourselves and with Hashem, we will get through this.  
All the best 

Welcome. May Hashem give you much hatzlocha. 

One point - we will all have these urges for the duration of our healthy lives. One should not feel guilty or broken from having desires. Rather our job is not to act on those urges, nor fill those desires.