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my lifelong battle with lust

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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

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TOPIC: my lifelong battle with lust 3309 Views

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 06 Feb 2011 21:37 #95880

Mordechai

ur-a-jew wrote on 03 Feb 2011 23:01:

And remember 90 days is just a stepping stone. After a nearly 30 year addiction, it will unfortunately take more than 90 days to overcome.

You are so right ur-a-jew, thank you!!!

I know that 90 days is not a point when I can say: I made it, now I can relax and let my guard down. I am aware that I need to be constantly on guard! Every minute of every day! But seeing another day clean gives me so much joy! I try to make it a habit of trying to update the chart everyday, so I will be reminded of my succes for that day and the need to stay strong and not letting lust in.
Today I am 77 days clean!!
When I reached 70 days, my wife gave me a chocolate bar wrapped in a gold coloured wrapper. (I told her about the chart and the virtual rewards you’ll get) She said: “you will also get a ‘gold bar from me’. She rejoices with me for every clean day.
If you are able, share your successes with your spouse, so you can rejoice together. That joy will also be a great chizuk to continue the battle against lust.
For me, seeing my wife rejoice as I have spent another day clean tells me I’m finally doing the right thing, makes me proud at myself (in a good way), builds up self esteem and makes me happy as well.

Up to 78 days!!!!!

Last Edit: 06 Feb 2011 21:55 by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 10 Feb 2011 21:13 #96542

Mordechai

a couple of days ago I heared abou t a young boy who died as a result of a braintumour. He was 3 years old and had been fighting the disease for a year and a half. My brother knows the family. It reminded me that the most important thing we can give to our loved ones and HaShem is our time!! We must not spend it on worthless things and forbidden entertainment, because you never know how much time you have.

Quite a sobering thought.

I hope it strengthens you just as much as it did me.

--Mordechai--

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Re: my lifelong battle with lust 11 Feb 2011 00:21 #96582

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 384	When the real-estate in my brain is taken up with the stupid distraction that is lust, I have no time for my kids, my wife, myself, and especially none at all for Hashem - even if I am davening thrice daily and learning. Boruch Hashem for every single day sober - and especially for today - no matter what was before or what may come after! You are a very fortunate man, Mordechai!
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 19 Feb 2011 19:29 #97559

Mordechai	Today was a very special shabbos for me... because this shabbos I reached 90 days sober!!!!!! I'm very grateful to HKBH for helping me reach 90 days and for leading me to this great site and through GYE to all of you fine people!!! Your support and posts help me stay strong and encourage me to go on. a great toda to all of you --Mordechai--
	Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 19 Feb 2011 19:35 #97560

geshertzarmeod Current streak: 8 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Like a bridge over troubled water. Posts: 595 Karma: 3	Phenomenal! Mazal Tov! May you keep going from Chayil L'Chayil!
	ישראל אע"פ שחטא ישראל הוא If you're connected above, you won't fall down below - Reb Shlomo ולבי חלל בקרבי לולא האמנתי לראות בטוב ה' בארץ חיים Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 20 Feb 2011 00:49 #97562

Rising Up Current streak: 122 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 395 Karma: 0	CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
	Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 20 Feb 2011 01:40 #97565

yona18 Current streak: 4500 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 364	Congratulations Mordechai!
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Re: my lifelong battle with lust 20 Feb 2011 01:43 #97566

kedusha Current streak: 717 days OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 3167 Karma: 46	Very appropriate - on the Shabbos of Shushan Purim Koton, we can all shout "Boruch Mordechai!" Mazal Tov!
	Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'! Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 20 Feb 2011 04:26 #97585

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 384	Mazel Tov.....now there is today, just like there was only 'today' yesterday. Today is precious, isn't it?
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 20 Feb 2011 17:09 #97677

Yosef Hatzadik OFFLINE Platinum Boarder A GYE'er since 2010 Posts: 2986 Karma: 10	GEVALDIG!!!
	*Yosef Hatzadik's Ha'oros* *Tov veyoshor Hashem al kein yoreh chata'im baderech!* Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 21 Feb 2011 04:33 #97797

rashkebehag	Mazel tov wishing you הצלחה in all areas of your עבודת השם
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Re: my lifelong battle with lust 21 Feb 2011 05:39 #97799

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	Mazel Tov Mordechai! very happy to hear about your milestone keep up your great work you are investing in your life (remember also that as all good investors say: past performance is not a guarantee for future results, the Y'H is known to pick fights with post-90-ers as well as newbies, if not more so) KUYGW!
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 21 Feb 2011 19:54 #97889

im not alone	mazel tov mordchei i'm really happy for you, such success stories are a breath of fresh air please have us all in mind, we all want to be there (i'm heading there with my 18 wheeler) in the mean time i'll just KEEP ON TRUCKING just keep up till 120.................... "years"
	Last Edit: by .

Re: my lifelong battle with lust 06 Mar 2011 21:08 #99813

Mordechai

(remember also that as all good investors say: past performance is not a guarantee for future results, the Y'H is known to pick fights with post-90-ers as well as newbies, if not more so)

This is so true.. Ever since reaching 90 days the Yetzer hara has been working on me. I was so thrilled about my succes that the Y'H' had me think about my succes and how I was last year and the years before. How addicted I was. when I thought about that images started to surface in my mind and I felt the urge growing again...Baruch HaShem, I didn't give in and am still clean. It's just that the Y'H'is telling me that I can afford to let my thoughts wander and see if I am still addited or still strong. Truth of the matter is: yes I am still addicted and it is only by HKBH that I am still clean!!!! it reminds me to never, ever let my guard down. (before you know it you're KO)

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Re: my lifelong battle with lust 07 Mar 2011 17:50 #99958

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	Mordechai wrote on 06 Mar 2011 21:08: Truth of the matter is: yes I am still addicted and it is only by HKBH that I am still clean!!!! it reminds me to never, ever let my guard down. (before you know it you're KO) very true good attitude you have there keep up the good work!
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .