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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

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TOPIC: fresh start 79525 Views

Re: fresh start 17 Aug 2009 18:53 #12782

kedusha
Current streak: 717 days
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My Dear Struggle,

I once discussed my Nisyonos with HaRav Scheinberg, Shlita. This was when I was single, and way before the Internet. I had been under control for about a year, and felt myself about to fall (or in the middle of falling). Rav Scheinberg was very understanding, and encouraged me to immerse my mind in learning or, when learning is not possible, in other things that need to be done. He referred to the Rambam at the end of Isurei Biah, among other sources. He said that this is a challenge that we all face in our years before marriage. Of course, as we see from this site, getting married does not solve this problem, but it can be quite helpful in keeping the y"h at bay (as long as we don't let our eyes stray - rhyme intended!

Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'!

Last Edit: by BiggerPicture.

Re: fresh start 17 Aug 2009 19:10 #12789

Sturggle Current streak: 178 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1706 Karma: 1	So, Kedusha, are you suggesting that I get married, immerse my mind in learning or just be busy? I think being busy is the best for me right now, with as much immersion in learning as I can...
	Last Edit: by Good girl.

Re: fresh start 17 Aug 2009 19:15 #12791

battleworn	Struggle, you have to get busy about making your life meaningful.
	Last Edit: by Guard.

Re: fresh start 17 Aug 2009 19:22 #12794

bardichev

5 THINGS YOU CAN DO THAT WILL HELP 100s OF PEOPLE

1 GO INTO ANY SHTEEBLE AND CLEAN UP THE SEFORIM
2 CONTACT 2-3 GABBAIM IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD ASK THEM IF THEY NEED BULBS CHANGED IN SHUL
3 CALL THE ADMINISTRATOR OF YOUR SCHOOL ASK THEM IF THEY NEED HELP SETTIMG UP CLASSROOMS
4 CALL A LOCAL BIKKUR CHOLIM OFFER A NIGHT SHIFT ( THEY WILL ACCEPT IN A HEARTBEAT_
5 CALL ANY CHESED ORGANAZATION ASK THEM IF ANYONE NEEDS A RIDE

Last Edit: by strike.

Re: fresh start 17 Aug 2009 19:32 #12797

kedusha Current streak: 717 days OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 3167 Karma: 46	struggle wrote on 17 Aug 2009 19:10: So, Kedusha, are you suggesting that I get married, immerse my mind in learning or just be busy? I think being busy is the best for me right now, with as much immersion in learning as I can... Sounds like a great idea. And save marriage for when you have this problem under control - your future wife will thank you for that!
	Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'! Last Edit: by ycbbt12.

Re: fresh start 17 Aug 2009 20:28 #12813

bardichev	ONE MORE THING U CAN DO PRINT THE GUE PAMPLETS AND DISTRIBUTE THEM IN PLACES U THINK MAY BENEFIT FROM THEM
	Last Edit: by dov28.

Re: fresh start 19 Aug 2009 21:37 #13375

Pintele Yid

struggle wrote on 16 Aug 2009 08:00:

I fell last night. I was at my grandparents for Shabbos and they have a computer that is not filtered... I was thinking of going out, but Shabbos ended late anyway and my friend that I was going to get together with got held up somewhere. I decided I'd turn in a bit early, it was cute, my grandfather said that at my age it was a crime to go to sleep so early, but I was tired anyway and planning on getting up pretty early for shacharis. I figured I'd read a book and fall asleep. I ended up going on the computer, checking this site and then, well, things went downhill from there. I wish I could even send out a cry for help like many others do on this site, but I was gone... And I thought I wouldn't go so far, just a minute and that's it, and an hour plus later... Then I woke up this morning for davening on time, which I was happy about and pleasantly surprised that I was able to. I fell again this morning, acting out my own in bed before I got up and even after I got back from davening by going online again... I am feeling quite miserable and almost like I want to give in... I know that I don't want to, but I am feeling somewhat helpless and hopeless and it's pretty strong. Now I'm still at my grandparents on my own computer, which is filtered, and my parents are here. I don't feel like spending time with my parents... and in this mood, it's not helpful, but for some reason I think I might stick around here anyway... I don't know what's with me... Well, just checking in... Hope to keep my head above water for the rest of the day.

struggle

Heiliga Struggle,

I am very sorry I have not been able to post recently. My time has been extremely limited.

Please remmember that when you get out of this situation and become an Emes Ba"al Tshuva in this Inyin(and if you stick around GYE and implement the advise you will get out), the Malach Gavriel or Michael will take every drop of Zerah that you spilled and bring it on the Mizbayach Shel Mayla as a Korbon for Hashem. Remmember Zdoinois Nasseh Kezochuyos!

Rome wasn't built in one day and when there is a will there is a way. You will B"H beat this. Just don't get deppressed!

Something to think about when going into Elul

Love Pintele

Last Edit: by Jaeger.

Re: fresh start 19 Aug 2009 22:23 #13378

Sturggle
Current streak: 178 days
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Karma: 1

Pintele Yid wrote on 19 Aug 2009 21:37:

Please remmember that when you get out of this situation and become an Emes Ba"al Tshuva in this Inyin

Pintele Yid, thanks for the encouraging words. I'm thinking about the above, though, and wondering, "Is that ever really going to be me?!"

Bardichev, Battleworn and Kedusha, thanks for posting here and for your words! Bardichev, you have some really good ideas... I hope to implement some of them when i am able. I actually sat today with my roommate who is getting married soon and helped him make phone calls to all of those people who have not yet responded to the wedding. It felt very meaningful to be helping out and doing something for someone else. Then he got me and another friend lunch because of it... I hope that doesn't cancel my zchus in helping...

I've also been hanging around a lot in this forum for the last few days and I have been feeling a lot better than I was at the very beginning of the week, I just hope I'm not getting addicted to GYE!!

Last Edit: by luigi.

Re: fresh start 19 Aug 2009 22:30 #13380

bardichev	MAZEL TOV ON YOUR FRIEND IMY"H BY U OIF SIMCHAS!!!! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK IT WILL ALWAYS COME BACK TO YOU!!
	Last Edit: by kokos.

Re: fresh start 19 Aug 2009 23:31 #13390

Pintele Yid

struggle wrote on 19 Aug 2009 22:23:

Pintele Yid wrote on 19 Aug 2009 21:37:

Please remmember that when you get out of this situation and become an Emes Ba"al Tshuva in this Inyin

Pintele Yid, thanks for the encouraging words. I'm thinking about the above, though, and wondering, "Is that ever really going to be me?!"

Of course you will do it! There have been so many people in GYI that have. Keep on reading their stories and their tactics and be inspired. It will eventually sink in and you will win. There is Achdus here at GYI. The Y"H is alone. Koach Harabim Adifa

struggle wrote on 19 Aug 2009 22:23:

I've also been hanging around a lot in this forum for the last few days and I have been feeling a lot better than I was at the very beginning of the week, I just hope I'm not getting addicted to GYE!!

Getting addicted to GYE is good. Will keep you busy and out of trouble

Pintele Yid

Last Edit: by username007.

Re: fresh start 20 Aug 2009 06:34 #13433

Sturggle Current streak: 178 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1706 Karma: 1	3 days clean. I am back on the charts. what a feeling. now the challenge, today. anything particular? no, except for making today today, if that makes sense to anyone, it does to me. chodesh tov!! lots of love, struggle
	Last Edit: by mishkan.

Re: fresh start 20 Aug 2009 18:51 #13528

Pintele Yid	Heiliga Struggle, 3 days ;D That means you have a full fledged Chezkas Tahara gong into Chodesh Elul!!!!!!!! Chazak Vematz, Pintele Yid
	Last Edit: by .

Re: fresh start 22 Aug 2009 21:45 #13716

Sturggle Current streak: 178 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1706 Karma: 1	gut voch. I'm feeling a little down right now. A little unsure as to why, it could be coming from numerous different places or all of them together. I think it's time go to sleep and I will start afresh tomorrow. love you all and looking for a big hug, Struggle
	Last Edit: by Qwer.

Re: fresh start 22 Aug 2009 22:01 #13718

the.guard Current streak: 805 days OFFLINE Moderator Posts: 6438 Karma: 138	A BIG HUG FROM GYE
	Webmaster of www.guardyoureyes.org - Maintaining Moral Purity in Today's World. We’re here on a quest ; it’s really all a test. Just do your best and G-d will do the rest. Last Edit: by anonymous.ttcg.