but the triggers are inside of me
inside my head
i cant get away from that
maybe after another many years of therapy

maybe ill just cry myself to sleep

i tried that. i could try other ppl,, but ayn li koach kvar
i dont want to explain to anyone what im feeling
i dont want anyone to know
if i cant protect myself then at least i can protect them

Sturrgle -

If the lust is killing you NOW and you want to overcome it now while GYE is an amazing site - get away from the computer and start  taking a jog. Run as fast as you can go until your heart rate hits 180. It really works and when you get back home the lust will definately be diminished.

Hatzlacha -

Update us as soon and as often as you can!!

Sturrgle, you're not flying that plane for fun! There are targets out there that you need to take out in order to bring the geulah (both your personal one and the general one)

Sorry that you weren't informed before, but every nissoyon is a message from the Commander-In-Chief to you. Now is the time to FIRE! Now is the time to muster up all your resources. Talk to us! Post away! TALK TO HASHEM!!! He's right there with you. This is your oppertunity! The hardest times are the times of the greatest growth!

Yasher Koach on shouting out!

I know this; fighting this thing has improved my life - the pleasure in my life - in ways I could have never imagined beforehand.

Hold on; this too shall pass.

WHOEVER KNOWS STURGGLE'S NUMBER- WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!
sturggle, my brother! empower yourself! YOU ARE GOOD!
and secrecy is only going to feed it! please, please, please don't keep quiet! Don't you remember! "Lust glows in the dark!"
turn on the lights! do 100 jumping jacks!
and we are not protected- we are alll exposed- the Y'h's telling you that we don't want to hear! WHAT A FILTHY LIAR!
we DO want to hear! we want to know!
talk!

ninety, i know what you say is true
but i dont want to jog now
i dont if that makes any sense

ive been hardly able to move from my bed all day
ok, im crying here, but i think thats good...
its relieving some of the tension i feel inside

i dont think this is over
but thanks for responding

jumping jacks sound like fun...
but guys i dont want to talk right now
i dunno...
its nothing new anyway
you can just read my previous posts
i dont like myself, period.
something i need to work on i know...
the fleeting pleasure of giving in to lust
can put on such a real disguise

cry. cry to Hashem and cry in anger to the Y"H!
but, please, struggle, cry on the phone to a real person!!!

Hey, instead of crying all by yourself, maybe give me a call. 052-713-9525

this is nothing new to any of us. you need to talk to someone. i know it's scary but IT IS SUCH A HELP. you need help and you showed that you want help by posting.
go get it!

im crying to you guys...
and it helps...
really does.
virtual or not, i feel a big group hug
and trust me i am crying!
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

im going to stop posting for a bit,
try to take care of some things around my apt
ill update you guys

and, seriously, thanks for the hug
i think maybe thats exactly what i needed

and even if you don't feel good about yourself- Hashem wants you to win this! The malachim are watching, they're holding their breath!
and we're davening- actually crying- for you! Hold strong!

Dear Sturggle, aka Struggle,

Passing just this one test might be your protection on the upcoming Yomim Noraim.

Why not read (hard copies of) the GYE handbooks?

SOMEBODY CALL STRUGGLE!