Boruch Hashem today is/was day one! It has sadly been a while since I was able to stay clean for a day (other than saturday), but today Hashem made my day busy and kept me protected! Hopefully today's success will bring success tomorrow and all the days that follow until I get to 90!

Everyone starts with day. One.

KOT!!!

B

So the y''h got me today after a great day yesterday, not one, but twice. What can you do... I gotta look forward to tomorrow and b'ezras Hashem tomorrow will be day one! I don't think I would even have a shot at being clean if it wasn't for this site. Everybody here has helped me largely and Hashem will reward you accordingly! Please keep up the good work!

oneday wrote on 24 Jun 2010 00:37:


Don't worry about tomorrow man, tomorrow is a mystery, yesterday is history, today is a gift, called the present.  8)

............Ok, so I copied that text from the personal chart, so what... Ok, ok it's not my text.... But it's still true....

And my papa also said: A thousand time is not enough, once is always to many times. ....Ok, ok, it wasn't my Papa, who said it, it's from GYE, but still it's true. When I'm Papa, I will say it - but that is the future, a mystery... So, what is it that I was saying????? Oh, a thousand times is not enough!

All the best to you, keep strong, just for one day, just for this hour!!!

Good Shabbos!

I fell again and again and again!  :'(
Why does this always happen? Why do I have to fight this battle? Why does it seem like I'm never going to get there? I know I''ll get there eventually as Hashem wouldn't put me in a situation that I couldn't overcome.
Yes, this difficulty has brought out the good in me (go to minyan for shacharis when not at school, learn on my own chumash etc...), but why couldn't I bring out the good without this nonsense!
I guess only better days are ahead as its pretty hellish right now.
Sorry for the rant, but I'm pretty fed up with dealing with this. I just want to break EVERYTHING that has an internet connection right now!
May everyone who reads this be successful in their own journey!
Today so many ones happened in my life today in sports (John Wall to the Wizards, Orioles getting a 1 game winning streak), but b'ezras Hashem tomorrow will bring a 1 in may streak to 90!

hey oneday,
it seems like you're thinking about the mental aspect of this a lot, and maybe not about the practical aspects. at least for me, i couldnt put any type of streak together if i had any, unrestricted internet access at my fingertips without someone else there. does your computer have a filter (with a password you dont know)? does your phone have its internet disabled? are there any other causes of falls that you havent gotten rid of? it took me a while to figure this out, but only when you are truly, 100% honest with yourself does this fight get any easier. heck, i dont know too much about your situation, i just thought i'd chime in to see if i could help  8)

and as for your second paragraph asking all these questions, realistically, you just gotta stay in this battle. as long as you never give up, you're doing fine. think about it like this: you're running a rather long race (longer than a marathon). as you go, there will certainly be areas that are more difficult, uphills, wooded areas etc. but at the same time, if you ever want to finish this race, you gotta push through these difficult times because you know deep down you want to finish this race! and when you do hit these so-called uphills, just think about the fact that for every uphill, there's a downhill to come! when you have to run through forests and are being tripped up by branches and brush, just look to the beauty that surrounds you. with this battle, yes there are rough patches, but you gotta just keep runnin' with it!

Hatzlocha and have a fantastic Shabbos! 

Thanks for the words Shlomo, I liked the analogy!
Boruch Hashem that I didn't just fall, y''h was saying just one quick look etc. I quickly went to my inbox and read a couple of chizuk e-mails!
Only 1 hour and 10 minutes left in the day and then today I'll go back in the win column!

So today was an interesting day to say the least, SO CLOSE to finishing day two, but its alright in my opinion today I reached a new level and I feel that this war had reached its turning point in my favor!

Here's what happened today in a story way as if I was an ice trucker:
So before I left town, I davened to Hashem that today I would have a successful day. I left the town and the ride was going pretty smooth and was just enjoying the scenery outside of the trees. I lost my footing on the breaks and began to slip around midday. Luckily, Hashem pulled me through and I continued my journey to my destination. A couple hours later the same thing happened, but luckily again Hashem got me through it. A few Hours after that, I slipped on some ice and my truck went off course, I bumped the tree but not much damage was done. (Opened a site, but closed it immediately). At 9:30 I hit this big ice chunk the sent me truck flying into a tree. It was quick. My truck didn't survive, but I was just happy that the airbag came out and I was unscathed. (I fell, but wasn't depressed, but happy that my timing in between falls grew!). I saw this truck come by immediately and waved my hand for help. It was my dad, Hakadosh Baruch Hu. He bought me this truck the other day and I though he would be mad that I ruined it. He said, don't worry about it, it's only a truck, I can buy another one. He was just happy that I was still there, there to continue the battle and not give up!
Sorry if my story doesn't make much sense, it did in my head. 

Basically, it was a long hard day, I lost at the end when I 'ran out of bullets', but my moral is high! My last three falls happened on different days and I haven't had for a few days my multiple falls! I can start seeing the sun to rise. I believe the darkest times have past! 

Hatzlacha to all! 

an old trucker once said:

keep on trucking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today wasn't a good day, but its alright. You're gonna have some good and bad and today was bad with the 2 falls. Its alright. Hopefully tomorrow I can get back on track!

Today was day one! The whole day today I was telling myself, fall tomorrow not today, today is a fast day! It worked! It feels good to get that all important day one in the books and b'ezras hashem can keep the momentum going and make tomorrow day two!

Remember that each day is valuable - each minute is valuable. Not just as part of staying clean long-term, but just for the here-and-now. No matter what happens 10 minutes from now, if I stay clean right now, that's a victory I can be proud of.

I find that helps me, sometimes.

I haven't posted these past couple of days because on Wednesday I made a neder that if I fall, I won't go on the internet for 24 hours. I happened to fall on those 3 days, but each time it was isolated. I have had much trouble isolating my falls to once a day and last week, I succeeded in isolating them.
Each week for the past 3 weeks, I have fallen less and less per week. I'm feeling pretty good about myself as I finish day one now and tomorrow I will be out of town so I will be able to get day two in the bags also!
A couple weeks before summer started, I though it would be a train-wreck and I would only get worse and worse. I asked Hashem help a few times and he has been pulling me through! Yes, I am still far from perfect in this, but I believe I have already cut my falls by 50% from last week 'till a month ago!
The tables are turning!
May everyone else have success in their own battle!

After two clean days and about 2 hours away from reaching 72 hours (3 days), I fell. Today, it all came crashing down falling three times. Even though today wasn't so great, I'm going to have to forget about it and view it as only a little bump in the road. I never said this would be a perfect ride! B'ezras Hashem tomorrow I'll be back on track!

Tell me my friend - when you fell the second time in one day - what were you thinking?
"if I already fell then so be it...?

Maybe we could count half-days?
I see you're counting hours!

Keep strong and in touch. Report your fall at once, and get feedback.
even better - if you're feeling like a fall is coming - ask for help!
Noora bei Amram!