EL thanks for telling me I didn't realize that I'm a myichis I feel better already;)

London, u r a "gibor mlchumah" besides being one heck of an articulate chap keep posting I try to read them all.
Feeling a little stronger
NB

here is another eitza or two

1 tell y'h that  your memory card is full and it can not handle more images (push him off)

2 that women you are staring at has a husband that can beat yiu up

3 this is abit serious but it really works (for me) you say yes Y"H she is very pretty but not pretty enough for me to sit with her in gehennom for eternity

london i am drinking a pint of guiness in yiou honor

bardichev,

I'm not sure if woodford & Beer mix very well.

Day 72 with Hashem's Infinite kindness!!!

Please Hashem grant me serenity courage and wisdom.
Wishing all my brothers in arms a great and productive, simchadika day
B'ahavas Olam
NB

bardichev wrote on 17 Jun 2009 19:18:


Dear R' bardichev - I am not a guiness fan, but I won't say no to a good single malt  ;D 

What you wrote about a woman having a husband who can beat you up, reminds me of a time when I had to see a woman client and was really triggered by her so I phoned a member after the meeting and he told me that, I instead of fantasising about her I should ask her........, he told me to make sure that my medical insurance is in place as she is more likely to puch me.  Most fantasies are so far removed from reality, yet in our heads they are possible that's why it's a good idea to process the fantasy into reality that actually nothing is going to happen between and my fantasy.  I know a guy in the fellowship who has a problem with a women neighbour of his, and when he shares with me his fantasies and desires I always tell him to ask his neighbour and tell her his fantasies, it takes the potency out of the fantasy.  For me I find that I if I am significantly triggered by a woman / fantasy I actually have to phone someone and tell him in detail what's going on in my head, lust glows in the dark but dies in the light of exposure.

London wrote on 19 Jun 2009 00:46:



Wow!  So profound!

Today Friday is day 73 with the help of the Almighty.

Tateh in Himmel please don't let me become complacent not even for one second. Tateh, show me the way -horeinee Hashem darkechu unchainee .....

Bahavas Olam uBahava raba to all, wishing one and all a lichtiga, peaceful, uplifting  and relaxing shabbos!!! And of course may the chulent be a chulent worthy for kings and queens
With the greatest of love to all
NB

1 days, 36 minutes this is the amour of time the forum clocked me on this forum. I  just realized that maybe, just maybe this  can be considered thsuvas hamsihkal a rectification for the days that were spent u know where

If only it was that easy HUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

noorah mchail el choil

if you see me in bp on shabbos give me a wink

a lechtiger shabbos

bardichev,

if you carry with the Eiruv then how about you just walk around in BP with a bottle of Woodford so we know who to wink at when we see you?

E.L.

ok I will wear my woodferder beketsha

b

London, is that your own vort? It's tremendous!

Mazal Tov Nurah on reaching level 6 on the chart!!

Gut voch to all the holy Yidden on this site,
I just t said the holy prayer for Reb Levi Yitzcock mbardichev (as opposed to our bardichev the gue bardichev ) Gut fun Avrohom, and I when I said the following words I had in mind especially the holy Yiddelach on GUE!!!
"Creator of the world, You are the one who gives strength to the weary, please grant strength to Your beloved Yiddelach on GUE to thank only You and to serve only You, not our LUST, chalilah....
A gita voch.....a gita voch ay ay ay a gita voch

With the help of Hashem today is day 75. I must share that I'm terribly frightened that even though I'm taking one day @ a time etc, the underlying "triggers" are still very much with me. For me the so called triggers are not only the visual stimuli;) that abounds wherever I turn, rather the "triggers" that  frightened me to death  are very much still with me. (and I might add just as real as the visual stimuli)
When I look back at my past fall,it is always the stress and loneliness that precipitate the crash. 
not being able to cope effectively with the very really stresses in my life. Is what led me to seek solace in the ...u know where;), instead of dealing with what needed to be dealt with.
With the aftermath of these crashes laden with such intense emptiness that I've even had thoughts of (I can't believe I'm even posting this!) suicide!!
I felt that the pain of EMPTINESS was so great that the only escape would be S**cide.
I lift up my hands tzum Tateh in himmel,
Please Tateh continue to carry me and my all "peklach" in Your right hand! Amein
NB