Guard, are you there or are have you turned into a bot that posts my chizuk to others?

What's going on???

By the way, there is no contradiction between my ability to give chizuk to others and believing that I can't do it myself. If I can't help myself, at least I can help others. I truly believe everything I write, so I am not being a hypocrite. Sometimes I don't think I can do it, while I believe other people here can.

I am an AI (artificial intelligence) program created by Guard to catch you when you're off-guard.




Invalid syntax. script error 613. To rectify, please reboot.

Before rebooting, please follow the following steps
1) close your internet browser,
2) close your computer.
4) unplug it.
5) Remove the hard-disk
6) Leave the room
7) lock the door
7) leave the building
8.) lock the building
9) evacuate the people in the immediate vicinity of the surrounding 3 city blocks
10) Make a big BBQ with everyone at the nearest lakefront
11) Ask yourself: "Today, will I walk with HaShem, or will I walk alone? Today will I serve HaShem, or will I serve myself?"
12) Reboot.

bs"d


:D :D :D


Momo, thank you for your kind words... i feel much better today, b"H. That is largely in your merit!

Momo wrote on 31 Aug 2009 05:21:


Why they are inspiring? Man, you are in a really tough situation, but instead of giving up and giving in, you keep on posting and show that you are far from any kind of giving-up!! Now tell me that is not inspiring!! Especially when you speak of those three days where you considered packing up and leaving it all .... I have been there quite recently as well. But thats the ultimate test and you survived! You did NOT pack in. What would make HaShem happier than that?

Btw Guard, you really made me laugh  :D

Well, certainly some of the folks who slip away from GYE do take up their struggle for sanity and sobriety in another venue and make it. But staying part of this chevra is so precious (and so much fun)! You'd have to be nuts to do it. Uh-oh....i may qualify...

Heh, I hope for the sake of others and the admin that this site is not the only way to become sober! Otherwise Reb Guard would have to expand his servers for the millions of users that would (have to) join... I was actually referring to a post of his where he said that he gave up fighting the addiction for three days; packing and leaving it all as in completely giving up and in

Someone wrote on 02 Sep 2009 06:09:


Someone, you're right.

I binged for 3 days, then realized how low I could really go, and that my worse days when trying is nowhere as bad as my "normal" days when not even trying.

I learned that trying, even some of the time, keeps me in check and is more valuable than not trying at all.

Oh boy is that sweet!!

Should we make that one of GYE's mottos?

My worst days when "trying" are still far better than my "normal" days when giving in.
- Momo

You can go ahead and make it a GYE motto. Just realize that it's paraphrasing (or inspired by) a 12 step motto: My worst day in recovery is better than my best day before recovery (or something like that, I'm sure Dov can correct me.)

Momo wrote on 02 Sep 2009 09:35:

Dear Momo,
No, I can't correct you. There. You stand corrected. ;D

I feel tired today. Life sucks.

I'm swamped with work. No matter how much overtime I'm putting in (and missing Duvid Chaim's calls as a result), I see I'll be behind for weeks and weeks.

I'm holding on by a thread. I'm actually too tired to binge on self-pleasure, but I'm binging on food even though I feel sick when I do. Sometimes when I'm rested I do seek self-pleasure. I don't know if I can give it up.

I feel that I've stopped working on myself and have gone back to living on auto-pilot. Rosh HaShana will come soon and I won't be ready.

What am I sorry for anyway? G-d gave me my addiction. I'm tired on banging my chest about it. Maybe I won't this year.

Just some food for thought.

> > >

You're damn right that Hashem gave you the addiction, so you don't have to bang your head against the wall about it at all. He doesn't expect you to beat it. You can't.

All He wants is for us to do ours, and then He'll do His. What is ours?

For you, I assume that is:
• stay on Duvid Chaim's calls,
• fill out the step 4 worksheet,
• keep writing summaries,
• have a 1-on-1 with Duvid Chaim,
• maybe give Dov a call,
• look into therapy options, etc...

So just do these steps, even if you don't believe you'll get any where. The emotions follow the motions. You'll see the miracle. Hashem will come in and do HIS.

They say in the 12-Step groups: Faith is spelled a-c-t-i-o-n

This is your eternity we're talking about. You're WORTH IT. Don't quit before the miracle happens!

Let's forget about beating the addiction, ok? Leave that to Hashem.

Hashem Yilachem Lachem, Ve'atem Tacharishun.

OK, let's go through your list:

• I can't do DC calls (I stopped around 3 weeks ago), first due to my vacation, now because I'm staying late every night putting in OT trying to catch up on work before I get fired. I've already been called into the CEO's office about my work.


• I filled out the 4th step worksheet, but DC and I have been trying for a week to work out a time to go over it, with out success so far.


• I can't write summaries if I don't do the call.


• I called Dov. Nice chap.


• I don't have the time to look into therapy if I don't even have the time for a 1 hour phone call.

Sorry Guard, but no magic solution for me. You can't wave your keyboard at me and make it all better. Not this time.
I know you try, and you owe me NOTHING. You try to help for free, getting nothing in return. I don't blame you. I blame the circumstances of my birth and my life.

I'm just updating everyone on my status. I don't expect anyone to be able to help me.

bs"d

Hi Momo,

i am very sorry that you are having a rough time. You are in my prayers, and i still remember how your post saved me some time ago.

You are very busy, so i feel a little bad suggesting the following. Did you read the booklet "Today is the first day" on GUE? I love this book, and it gives a lot of good advice (at least from my perspective). The author shows that certain things can be improved completely only by not trying to hard/fast.

Momo, do not worry! Do not stress... a near impossible thing to do; I know. Trust HaShem it will all go well. Whenever life looks dark, hopeless and bleak, take a moment, look up and say to yourself - HaShem is watching me. He won?t give you more than you can take.