you know him?

I love you Uri, but I don't know if I have Koach to explain it again, because I've explained it so many times before and I don't seem to get anywhere... Maybe ask Reb Shlachter what my shitah is on the 90 days... I shmoozed with him today for a while, and we were in full agreement 

Hint: See the GYE handbook. Notice that tool #6 - (finding alternate fulfillment) and tool #7 (cutting down slowly) come before tool #8 - (the 90 days).

We put it in the welcoming e-mail because it's a great motivator to get people started (after all, addicts love control, no?  ) Once they get on the 90 day train, they start to learn the real secrets of letting go (and all that kind of stuff) from the forum... Over time, their 90 day journey becomes a whole different ball-game... They learn that it's not a goal in itself, they learn how to let go, they try to find inner serenity, how to live one day at a time, etc... and hopefully the tricks they learn here can take "root" because they are not acting out... (all under the pretense of getting to 90 days  ). Cuz if an addict is in active addiction, they can't learn how to "let go and let G-d" or all the other beautiful truths we learn in recovery. As they say in AA, "Do it Sober"  And like Momo always says, "Restricting yourself frees yourself to be the real you"... so hopefully they'll get to 90 days with a whole new attitude. Oh, and then the scientific study will kick in too - and not only will they have a better attitude - they'll also have managed to hopefully change the neuron pathways of the addiction!  :D

And BTW, I also spoke to Battleworn today, and we agreed that if a person is succeeding to slowly cut down (through tools #6 and #7), then even if he's not making it all the way to 90 days (tool #8), he still may end up succeeding in the end. It is only if a person sees that neither tools 6, 7 nor 8 are working for them, and they are simply falling completely back into the addictive pattern again and again, then at that point they need to move on to the next tools, and ultimately go for therapy and the 12-Steps - to get a whole "attitude make-over" from those with the real experience...

my boss' daughter is taking a class in college in philosophy and she is going over the debate of whether we really have free choice in this world or whether our lives are completely dictated by the circumstances we are presented...in other words, if you take any person and out them through the exact circumstances they will b ethe same way...she came into my office and said "rage, what do you think about this topic"...i said, "how did you know my name was rage?" no, just joking...i said that i strongly believe that we have the inner power to make ourselves anything, our surrounding notwithstanding" and she said why (philoosphers can get away with saying why to everything you say...philosophers and my 6 year old)...i said, "momo"...she said "why"...i said i have met people that the odds were stacked up against them..this guy that the world was stacked up against him, every atom in the universe declared, "this person is condemned to be unhappy" and this person did not let it happen...he revolted...and he changed the course of the universe...momo, i know the road ahead is long but what you have already accomplished is nothing short of מעשה בראשית....you have brought to life this amazing person that moves each and every person on this forum and can in fact move mountains...and for that YOU ARE TRULY SOMEONE SPECIAL

rage, can i just say that you are one craaaaazzzzy nutjob lunatic?!!!!  :D ;D > :o 8) ??? : :-[ :-X :-\ :-* :'(