I would never have normally have seen myself posting, but due to my recent fall i feel i have to try a new avenue. Maybe allowing others in some what, will give me new strength. I have struggled deeply in this area since my early teens. At that time it was something i toke for granted never doubted never question just something i did and soothed through denial.From that period till now as a married man with kids i grew alot , but somehow this area remained hidden a secret of such. The last few years i have reflected inwardly alot to try and match my inside to the out to try to grow in a true really way without dillusion or false perception. I know i want to change i have no doubt but I struggle to truly beleive it after all the years of false starts and thoughts of this time will be different. I am turning to you not for pity and understanding but rather for courage and streangth that it can be done, you can rewrite your story so to speak. 

thanks 

It takes a lot of work, but you can do it! Stay here with the chevrah, because being connected is a good start! And who knows where it will take you!Please check out these free resources to jumpstart your recovery:ebook/book: The Battle of the Generation. Incredible book. It's a real game-changer.Audio series: The Fight by Rabbi Ben Tzion Shafier. Also incredible.Links are below in my signature.Hatzlocha!

It can and has over and over on this very site....

Welcome dear friend!
Try the F2F program, for me it was the key to start, there you will understand where you are up to and how you can move on to futher stages in recovery, and yes! this time it could be different!! Prove yourself!